


The Light Alchemist

by Hellcube



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Envy and Selim are the Elric brothers of the story, Homunculi are humans, Homunculi roleswap, Kimblee and Lust are basically the Roy and Riza of this au, Not as weird as it sounds, Pretty much the whole cast is in this, Roleswap, Roleswap AU, They are just all alternative versions of themselves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:01:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 45,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22269841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hellcube/pseuds/Hellcube
Summary: This is a roleswap au between most of the cast, the rest are simply altered to fit the narrative. Selim and Envy take the place of Ed and Alphonse Elric, all the Homunculi are humans and take the place of canon human characters.Prodigy alchemist Selim Hohenheim and his younger sibling Eve live in the outskirts of Central. Until they lose their mother Dante to a fatal illness, while Selim becomes a State Alchemist to save their home, Eve gets another idea. Now with his sibling cursed from committing taboo, the siblings take it upon themselves to use Selim’s military power to find the Philosophers Stone and fix Eve’s body.Will they succeed? Or will they realize there is something far more dark lurking under their feet?
Relationships: Dante/Van Hohenheim, Zolf J. Kimblee/Lust
Comments: 10
Kudos: 21





	1. The Garden Party

Eve hated garden parties. The people going in and out of their mother's mansion were fine. Having to speak to them was fine. The stupid dress was acceptable. Their mother introducing them to various guests, military and non-military, was boring but manageable.

That didn’t stop Eve from loathing every minute of it. 

The party had just started; Eve’s mother was gathering their loose blonde hair into a bun. They were in their mother's room, as they always were before these important social events. God forbid Eve destroy their family reputation by tilting their hat the wrong way. 

Their mother grabbed some pins from the dark wooden desk in from behind her. The room was modest, as rich went they were on the lowest end. Soft green walls with wooden trim, her makeup area in the front of the room. A large round mirror with handcrafted trimming sat on the mahogany make-up table. Golden doorknobs for the small pockets of skin and hair care products, elegantly curved legs with birds carved into them supporting it. One chair with the same bird-like wood carving on the legs deep mahogany. 

The rest of the room follow suite, handcrafted armoire with subtle gold curls painted on and golden knobs. The sunlight reflected off the various wooden frames of paintings that decorated the wall. A large bed sat in the middle, with curtains currently covering silk gold and brown sheets and elegantly stitched pillows. 

It looked rich, but it was all presentation. The house was cheap due to the area; the garden was nothing but a bunch of dirt. Gardens are easy, anyone can throw a few flowers in the ground and buy a couple of fancy fountains. The furniture was all passed down and their dresses were cheap imitation silk. Better than when they get real silk, real silk felt like wearing an art piece. Any stain was a blemish on society and class, like spitting in the face of God. As if their mother had the right to whine, she sure as hell didn’t pay for it.

Eve could imagine it now, government and non-government scumbags thinking about the brownie points they’d get for buying a sweet woman a dress for her daughter. That’s how the family received half the clothes they owned.

Not that they didn’t respect it, those scumbags were fake. Their mother was fake too: it was a strange type of self-awareness. The military dogs never cared for their mother and she never cared for those men. They were completely resigned in their mesmerizing theatrics. It would almost be sad if it weren’t so amusing.

“They’re our guests.” Their mother chided, practicality read their thoughts. Eve kicked their foot against the stool they were sitting on. 

“Doesn’t mean they aren’t brain dead rats.” Eve replied dryly. Their mother smiled at this.

Her dark brown eyes drifted slightly. ”Don’t be so sure, we have some important guests tonight. The Fuhrer’s best.”

“The Fuhrer's best? So more horny old men, yeah, real important.” They hissed back. 

Their mother grabbed at a loose hair that rejected the bun. “Alchemists, war heroes. I would like your respect for them. You’re making things hard eno-“

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll smile and look pretty. Don’t worry about it-“ Their mother slapped the back of their head. Eve winced and turned to her, eyes wide.

“Don’t interrupt me! If you are going to keep this attitude you’re going to stay in your room all night. Be respectful, be kind, be social. This is a very important day for Selim and I won’t have your childish behavior get in the way of that. He wouldn’t do that for you.” She scolded.

Eve shrunk down; she was right. Selim wouldn’t ruin their day, he never has. This was a big deal for him and Eve should at least pretend to be supportive. Even if it wouldn’t matter, you would have to be brain dead to hate Selim. 

“Good…” Their mother said. She had given up on the loose blonde hair. It hung in Eve’s face, right in between their eyes. Their mother walked over to her small armoire. 

“Who would think such lovely, golden hair could be such a pain. Did you wash it or did you forget again?” She mused, cracking the armoire open. She picked up a hat from a golden hook and tossed it in Eve’s direction. 

“Of course I did! I’m not a child!” Eve grumbled, setting the hat on their head. They adjusted it so the brim sat nice and straight.

“Then stop acting like one. Now, go downstairs and introduce yourself. I have to get ready.” She demanded sweetly.

Eve slowly nodded and left the room, walking downstairs. 

The rest of the mansion’s decorations were a carbon copy of their mothers room. Gold framed paintings of various big deal artists hung on the wall. All the doors were a deep brown with golden knobs, complementing the pale brown walls.

Eve didn’t understand their mother's obsession with gold. It was the easiest way to look rich. That’s the only answer they had.

They took off their hat and looked it over. It had a round shape, with a wide brim, a pale green ribbon, and delicately sewn fabric roses noticeable against its white material. It did match their stupid, emerald green dress. The fake silk gown was paired with a white cardigan and red strap shoes. 

The kitchen and sitting room were right in front of the large patio doors, more obscured but still open to the light. Cabinets stained deep brown with golden knobs -what other kinds of knobs would they have- lined the walls. The kitchen was large and closed in, with a wooden table in between it and the sitting room. A big table was in the dining room and was only used on special occasions. Warm mid-afternoon light reflected through the large oval windows, casting light on the blue and white of the sitting room couches. 

They walked past them to the patio door and out to the garden. The garden was full of various flowers of hundreds of hues, all they remembered planting. Eve felt a bit of pride knowing half the flowers they either planted themselves or helped their mother plant. A large fountain was in the center of the garden with three large, stoned paths leading to it from all directions.

A large table was in the front near the entryway to the garden, full of food and drinks. Mostly water and fancy appetizers their mother would always make: escargot on bread, cheese and bread slices, hummus, mini tarts, and a few other light dishes. Alcohol was hidden under the pink table cloth, in case someone brought kids. 

Guests were scattered throughout the garden, most in black, gray or brown suits. Some wore blue military uniforms, and most women were in candy-colored summer dresses.

Eve walked into the garden and they could see Selim. He was tall for thirteen and wore the same blue suit he always liked. How predictable, Eve thought to themselves. He was chatting up the only woman at the party who seemed to forget what season it was, and a male in a white suit.

The woman wore a red dress, her hair was in delicate curls, and her makeup was way too sultry for the event.

“Who the hell wears dark red to a garden party?” Eve muttered to themselves. 

Apparently that got their brother’s attention. His eyes shot over to them, his hand waving. Eve mentally groaned but pasted on a fake smile. They walked over, mentally preparing for another wonderful conversation about alchemy. 

They got a good look at the man, his hair in a ponytail, a neatly pressed white suit, and wild gold eyes. His smile was the kind only seen on a man with blood on his hands and was damn proud of it. This guy was definitely a war hero.

“This is Lieutenant Colonel Solaris and Major Kimblee, They’re both alchemists.” Selim said with a bit of excitement in his voice. Solaris waved sweetly in response while Kimblee simply kept his nightmarish smile.

Eve kept their fake smile, holding their hand out to the pair. “I’m Eve Hohenheim, a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” They said synthetically.

Solaris took their hand and shook it first, murder man going second. 

“It must be such an honor to be related to a man of legend.” Kimblee mused. Solaris shot a look at him.

“Ignore him, I have heard quite wonderful things about your father.” Solaris said. 

‘Like his _amazing_ alchemy skills, that clearly run in the family’ Eve finished mentally. “Oh I don’t mind, our father is quite mysterious.”

“I learned everything I know from his books.”Selim budded in, “The principles of alchemy are quite simple when broken into parts, yet grossly fascinating. Like a mystery hidden in plain sight, or a painting with thousands of layers.” 

Solaris smiled at that, Kimblee’s expression didn’t change as he mused, “A painting with many layers is a perfect description. After all, how better to hide a layer than a fresh coat.” 

Selim seemed a bit shocked by the response, but quickly hid it under his signature smile. ‘A painting with many layers huh’ Eve thought to themselves devilishly. 

Solaris cut through any potential tension. “What is science without mistakes, learning is about the experience, isn't it?” She hummed.

“Yes, I suppose science is nothing more than trial and error.” Selim replied like he actually understood them. “The best alchemists were built by their failures, my father failed many times. It took me an entire year to get my light array right, I can imagine how long it must have taken father in his studies…” 

Eve shut Selim out and tightened their look at Kimblee. The would-be philosopher’s face was unmoving. Just another one of the government’s dogs doing tricks for engagement, those dogs Selim wanted to bark along too. 

“So, Miss Eve, is it?” Kimblee asked. Eve twitched. Sure, _Miss Eve_. As if this guy wasn’t irritating enough before.

“Just Eve is fine.” They responded, holding back their evident disgust. 

“I hear you dabble in alchemy as well?” He replied, taking note of the child’s poorly hidden distaste.

“Bits and pieces. I get by, but I’m no Selim.” They responded modestly, if they would be put down they would rather do it themselves. “Alchemy’s his whole life, I can’t imagine spending life like that.” They jabbed at the man, synthetic kindness in their voice. Eve’s eyes glanced lazily to Selim, who had started a conversation about his favorite mysteries of alchemy, and back to the nosy man.

“Now now, why put yourself down like that? I’m sure you're just as talented of an alchemist than he is. It runs in the family, doesn’t it?” 

Their eye twitched, now he was getting on Eve’s nerves. An empty compliment was meaningless to them, they wouldn’t even waste time pretending it was true. This man either wanted brownie points or some favor to get into their mom’s pants. Eve wasn’t interested in tha-

“Wouldn’t that be a waste of time?” Kimblee interrupted their thoughts.

“Excuse me? Alchemy? But didn’t you just ask?“ They tilted their head a bit, eyes back to Kimblee.

“Don’t play stupid, getting your mother’s favor.” Kimblee said, his murderous smile fading to a disinterested look. 

Eve froze, did this man read their mind? Could he do that? Or were they just being stupid, showing their emotions flat on their face just like their mother scolded them not too. 

“I won’t tell, I can’t imagine what you go through. You’re only a child after all,” he absently picked up a drink sitting on the fence next to him. “You’d do better telling your brother the truth about your feelings.” 

Eve glared daggers at the creepy man. “And just what might that be?” They replied, keeping their walls just high enough to elude him. He would give up once they stopped playing along, Eve had better things to do than play around with government fleabags.

“It doesn’t take an alchemist to see you’re miserable. Guests can be such a pain I imagine, especially when all they do is gloat about their accomplishments,” he mused.

This struck a chord in Eve, a burning desire to punch this pretentious man firmly in the face. He had a lot of nerve to pretend to understand them, to pretend to give two shits outside of obligation! Even worse, play the all-powerful alchemist card on them! They scuffed weakly to themselves, how pathetic. 

“Now what would I gain by angering one of many hosts? I simply want a real conversation.”

“Was our conversation before not real?” They mused the smile returned to their face, death lingered in their eyes. 

“Don’t ask questions you know the answer too.” He swished his wine delicately. “Fake or real, the line becomes blurred after the years. It never fades, it simply gets easier to pretend it’s gone.” 

“How deep, mister alchemist. What wise sage did you get that one from?” Eve bit back, sarcasm overtaking their voice.

Kimblee took a sip of wine, eyes unmoving, ”You hate me don’t you? And everyone here? I don’t blame you.” He glanced around to the guests, all deep in conversation throughout the garden. 

Eve didn’t respond, biting back their urge to call the man out. He had a trump card on them and he knew it. They were just a child. He was a war hero and a guest.

“My brother tells me you’re eleven? That’s seven more years until you’re an adult. What will you do? It’s your future.” He asked, his face more disinterested than focused, playing with his half-empty wine glass. 

“Whatever I would like, I am quite happy with our guests I’ll have you. It’s rude of you to use your military power on a child like that. What would my mother think, knowing of your cruelty to her dear daughter?” Eve lied, their fake smile breaking into a real smirk. 

“Now, she would have some nerve to call out a guest like that, wouldn’t she?” Kimblee said, swaying his wine glass to and fro, coldly eyeing the light reflecting off the clear surface.

Eve tensed up, of course, this asshole called their bluff. They had to be an idiot to think he wouldn’t! Their mother wouldn’t give two shits about them, they were the family’s stain. Their fists clenched, expression contorting into a cruel glare. Eve didn’t respond, whatever they had to say would only make things worse. 

“Only seven more years and you’re free. Free to be whoever you like, but time is fickle. By the time you realize what you have, it’s gone. All I ask is that you think about it. Do you really want to live like this forever? What do you want, Eve Hohenheim?” Eve felt their chest tightened at their name, mockingly spoken by another government shitbag. 

They knew a second more and they would tear this asshole to shreds. They took a deep breath, unclenching their fists for the time being. “I have to grab a few things.” They lied, turning heel, but not before sneaking a final look at Kimblee. He was wearing the same sadistic smile from before, twirling his wine glass. 

Selim hadn’t noticed, far too deep into his conversation about nothing. They huffed, forcing themselves out of their slouching position, plastering on a fake smile and pushing through the garden. Waving off at guests and they smiled to greet them, but quickly turned heel at any conversation. It took a minute or two to get to the back of the garden.

It was mostly grass and bags of seeds, with miscellaneous piles of stones laying on the wood wall of the gardening shed. The grass was patchier and the various flowers too ugly to stain the front garden were planted along the edge near the wooden fence. 

Eve retreated into the garden shed. It was full of tools on one side and a small dust-ridden desk on the other. They leaned against the empty wall on the other side, fuming, arms crossed tightly.

Like hell they cared about what some military fucks said about them, some nobody they would never see again. He was sucking the military’s dick like everyone else. As if the rat bastard had any right to say he gave a shit about them, then turn around and threaten their ass! Just like those military fucks, to play that card when they’re down. 

He couldn’t last a day in their shoes. He was a bitch, he would whine and cry if he had to be anything close to a decent person. When he couldn’t solve shit with his fancy suit and blue uniform. That woman was probably one of his whores, she probably rid his cock into the military. These were the same people Selim went around jerking off egos, for what? 

Favors and compliments? Did that shit matter? Did this stupid act matter? Didn’t make a difference to Eve, people were all playing different acts. People were fake, that was reality. No one had to be real, much less military fucks or silk dressed aristocrats. Being fake was their job. Fake smile, fake assurance, fake care, fake, _fake, fake…_

They threw their fist into the wall, it smashed on impact. A horrible shock of pain jolted through their arm. Eve screamed, grabbing their now bleeding knuckles. Great, more good news, they had horribly embarrassed themselves again!

Eve saw no point in wasting any more time in the stupid shed. They grabbed some bandages from the small cabinet in the shed, slowly and carefully wrapping it around their bloody hand. There was only a gauze-like bandage for deep cuts, the rest of the first aid kit was in the house. They tied up the bandage, mentally preparing for the onslaught of shit eating guests they would have to force through to get to the door. 

They had some gloves in their room they could grab to hide the wound once it was clean. Then they could make it back to the garden like always, and pretend as if nothing had happened. 

——

It didn’t take long to get back. Just as they had expected, Selim was gloating to guests. Their mother was now outside, her dark brown hair in a bun with a blue silk dress. Their mother wouldn’t be caught dead in fake silk. She had gold jewelry because of course she did. 

The man and his whore were having a conversation with a man in uniform and short black hair. His own woman alongside him with a pastel pink dress to her knees of flowing fabric. A few more guests were gathered on the garden paths and a few more were settled around the hors’ d’oeuvres table, chatting up their mother. Most women were in pastel flowing gowns, and a few men wore soft brown and gray suits, a few of the older men in blue, pink, and other pale pastel suits. Every outfit was a reminder of their fading or long-gone youth, expensive jewelry or watches, pearls as white as the gray in their hair. Every single guest was engaged in deep conversation.

No one noticed Eve arrive or how they hid their left arm. The bandage was far too embarrassing and any questions would only make things worse. They rushed to the door in the most casual way they could, waving their right hand to all the guests. A fake smile plastered to their face. 

Eve's mother glanced over to them, as one of her guests continued his story. She gave Eve a tight stern look, Eve tensing up and their mother glanced down to their left hand. “Fix it.” She demanded silently, before turning to the guest with a short smile as if nothing happened.

Yeah, Eve was definitely in trouble for that one. 

They crept inside, quickly turning to the ki-man stood in front of them. They stopped just short of slamming into his chest. He was in uniform, but his jacket was undone, revealing a black undershirt. 

“S-sorry!” They stammered.

The man laughed. “Don’t worry about it, hell I was the one about to slam into someone’s kid.” The man said embarrassed, rubbing the back of his head. His brown eyes widened. “Sh-I mean, you’re Dante’s kid right! Crazy that huh? So…” 

“Yes, I’m Eve Hohenheim. Sorry to bother you really, but I-“ They said as gently as they could, with a sweet smile.

He blinked a bit, “Right! Sorry! I’ll-“ he took a step closer to the cabinets, giving Eve just enough space to slide past him.

“Thank you. Sorry to disturb you-“ Eve began, eyeing the military uniform he had on, specifically the embroidery on the shoulders. “-Major.” 

The man still seemed tense and smacked his hand out in front of them. Eve jumped, startled by the abruptness of it. “Major Elric! Guess this stupid uniform is good for one thing.” He laughed.

Eve took his hand, shaking it quickly. They had a wound to patch up and this was only adding to their previous irritation. “A pleasure to meet you, Major Elric.” 

The Major looked them over before his face grew serious. Shit, what did they do this time!? Did he see-

“You’re bleeding.” He stated Eve’s face flushed red as a tomato. They pulled their hand away from him and over their bandages. 

“It’s fine! I was just going to take care of it!” They blurted out, anger slipping into their words.

Major Elric's eyes widened, then his expression softened. “Sit down.” It was more of a command than anything else, but his tone was kind and soft. 

Eve bit back a retort. This was a guest, they were already in trouble with a different one. The least they could do was not make another scene. They nodded.

Major Elric guided them to the kitchen table, they sat down. They were right next to the window and thankfully everyone outside was far too busy in their own conversations to notice the pair.

“Do you know any alchemy?” The major asked. 

“Bits and pieces.” They replied.

“Bits and pieces is plenty. Want some water?” He let go of Eve’s hand, walking to the cup cabinet. How did he know where that was? Come to think of it, what was he doing in their kitchen at all? The bathroom was the opposite direction! Unless… Of course! He was one of their mom's playthings! He was pretty young for that though, barely in his twenties, and Eve had never seen him before. Most of her favored rats at least introduced themselves to Eve, maybe he didn’t because he was so young? But why would someone so young even have an interest in a woman in her mid-thirties?

“How do you know where our cups are?” Eve asked blankly. 

Elric tensed up, fumbling for a cup before replying, ”This place is built a lot like my house! So I just assumed ya know.” 

Eve looked around the kitchen, there were more dishes on the drying rack than before. “Were you using our dishes?” 

Elric didn’t reply and filled the cup with water from the sink. His eyes clearly widened and nervous. 

Note to self, rewash those dishes. 

“Dante said I could make myself something, so I wasn’t stealing or anything like that!” He defended, handing Eve the glass. 

“No, just entering a stranger's home and eating their food. Totally normal.” Eve snarked, taking a sip of water. They were dehydrated and something about how easy it was to read the Major made them feel safe to drink it. If he was one of their mother's boys, he was certainly a bad actor, still better that Eve doesn't mention it. In case he was supposed to be a secret, but he looked so unprofessional. Their mother would never let one of her boys dress like that, nor did she have time to get him like that. Eve had been with her all morning, in her room. Had he been hiding in the guest room?

His light blond hair was much messier the second time they looked at it, it looked like all he had done was throw it in a braid. His bangs were overgrown and hung in his face, and his glasses were a bit askew. Eve decided to ignore it, everyone was up close with their mom, at least this guy was nice.

“How long have you been in the military?” Eve couldn’t help but ask.

“A month. Is it that obvious?” The major smiled weakly, his hand rubbing his neck again.

“No, you raided my kitchen, I would have guessed a few days.” Eve snarked, not that they could help it. The major was a puppy and they were right to call him out for it.

“I asked! Besides, I didn’t eat before coming. I thought there would be more than weird- I mean, tiny portions.” He caught himself again.

That’s a poor excuse for a guy that spent the night, but Eve let it pass. Tiny portions were normal for a small formal party, he had to be an idiot to expect otherwise. He would have to be a bigger idiot to not get food while Eve was with her mom getting ready. Unless he was worried about Selim?

“Well eat before next time, and button up your uniform. It makes you look unprofessional.” Eve mused, not that they believed him for a second. But they didn’t gain shit calling him out.

Major Elric sighed in defeat, he had accepted being grilled by an eleven-year-old. He wearily buttoned his coat up completely. “Better?” He half snarked, his elbow leaning on the table.

Eve smiled. “Elbow off the table and slick your hair back, maybe cut it too. Most majors don’t have ponytails.” 

“It’s a braid!” He blurted out, grabbing his braid. His face going red. “B-but...sure yeah.” He looked down away from Eve, then back to them. “But on the slicking back thing! I am not cutting it!” 

“Sure…” Eve chuckled, setting their empty glass on the table. They leaned back in their wooden chair. “Thanks for the talk but I’m kind of bleeding right know-“ 

“Wait! I can take care of that. Stay right there.” He pushed himself up from the table, the chair behind him screeching back. He turned heel for the front door, where the coats were.

Disappearing for a few seconds before returning with a leather-bound journal, a damp cloth from the bathroom, and small wooden box. He set them down on the table, one after another, before promptly sitting down.

“Give me your hand.” He requested calmly, Eve accepted, bringing their bandaged hand in front of him. It rested on the table, red seeping through the soft white. 

The major lifted their hand, removing the wet bandages. The blood wasn’t too much of a shock to see, Eve got cut often. It was typically self-inflicted, their anger always persuading them to do something stupid. 

He set the bandage aside, before speaking again. “Alchemy is good for a lot of things, but I think Ametris has closed its door far too much.” He grabbed the damp cloth and cleaned up the blood soaking their knuckles. The table was going to be a mess, but they could clean it after.

“Do you trust me? You can perform alchemy right?” He asked again.

“Are you going to transmute my wound away?” They half-joked, if Eve wanted all this alchemy talk they could go back outside.

“No, but I can show you how.” He smiled, oh so he was wasting their time. How very noble of him, subtly begging for fuck points.

“Aren’t you an alchemist, Major? Shouldn’t you be able to do that yourself?” Eve bit back annoyed, trying to play his keys a bit.

He set their hand down and opened the small chest, “I could never understand this form of alchemy. It’s out of my specialty.” The chest was full of needles.

Eve threw their hand back close to them, fuck no! They were not letting some crazy military dog stick pins in them! Much less one who just wanted brownie points! 

The major caught their fear, waving his hands to defuse the situation. “Relax! It’s not gonna hurt. It’s alkahestry!”

“Alkahestry?” Eve didn’t care what it was, they didn’t want it near them. They had heard of alkahestry, was it really a bunch of needles? No wonder it never made it to Ametris. 

“Healing alchemy, from the east. I’ve been studying it for a year now. Sadly, while I couldn’t get a handle on it, the concepts are simple. It seems some people have a knack for it and some don’t.” 

“And if I can’t do it?” Eve replied. Now more confused than anything else.

“Then we have hydrogen peroxide and gauze.” He reassured them,” Isn’t it at least worth trying? Human-based alchemy is a hard thing to master. So few in Ametris do, it’s at least worth opening the door.” The door that must have been shut in his face then, why did he have faith in Eve? Or was he faking it? 

Eve looked the man over, he didn’t seem too crazy. However, he also stole their food, so he could very well be crazy. He seemed too stupid to be corrupt, he was asking Eve to stick themselves full of needles. Most people who wanted favors from the great Dante just bought them stuff they didn’t want. Was this some advanced tactic? Was this guy an idiot or a genius?

Alkahestry, the concepts from their father's journals and their brother's alchemic rants. Did it really involve sticking yourself full of needles? Human-based transmutation was banned, wasn't it? Wasn’t healing human-based?

“I get it’s a weird thing to ask, but the needles won’t be in your skin. Just the table, and it’s different from human transmutation. It’s much safer, just rare in Ametris.” He pulled his journal to the middle of the table and shuffled through a few pages. “Here! This is the array, just draw it on the table and I can show you the rest.” 

Eve looking it over. It looked like a real array, but it didn’t seem like anything from Ametris. It was so simple, yet bared a few symbols Eve had never seen before. 

“It’s Xingese, it’s not necessary for the array to work, but this is how I was shown it. I was taught, by a healer in Xing.” He pulled out a piece of chalk. 

Eve focused on the array, could they do it? It seemed easy enough. If they failed they had backup, but if they seceded? That would mean they could understand other country’s alchemy. One the major claimed he himself couldn’t do, one they knew Selim didn’t know. They could use it to decode their father’s journals, or at least get farther than Selim. Even if the major was just lying for brownie points, Eve could at least gain something from it. Something that actually interested them!

A cruel smile crept up to their lip, “Give me the chalk.” They half demanded, the man absently agreed. 

Eve drew the array as accurately as they could. It was mostly line based shaped. No large circles or shapes, just pattern-based line placement. It was simple but intentional and Eve kind of liked it.

“Now what?” Eve glanced at the man, then to the needles. 

The major grabbed a couple of needles. “Place the needles on the five points of the array,” He instructed, sticking one on the top. The others were placed on the left corner, right corner, bottom right corner, and bottom left. “Like a star.” The major finished. 

“Then, it should be ready. Feel your body’s pulse, like you are a being of pure energy. Focus that energy into the array, onto mending your wound.” He instructed.

Eve nodded, focusing on themselves. They weren’t sure what that meant, all bodies held energy. To be nothing but energy? Like the energy in transmutation circles? Did you transfer your own energy? They closed their eyes, but no matter how hard they focused, they couldn’t feel it. Thoughts rushed in their head as they set their left hand on the array.

After a matter of minutes the man sighed, ”It’s alright.” Eve's eyes snapped open, so nothing had happened. The man continued, “I shouldn’t have expected you to be able to do it. It is entirely different alchemy, after all, I’d be surprised if anyone in Ametris could do it.” So it was hard. It was hard and Eve failed. 

Eve felt something stir inside of them, they failed! As if, he wasn’t helping them! How were they supposed to figure it out-their mother's voice entered their head ‘Selim would have figured it out already.’ Eve bared their teeth, Selim hadn’t, not yet at least. If Elric went trying to fancy Selim with the journal he would know in minutes. Shoving a newfound skill in Eve’s face again, they wouldn’t let that happen.

“Really, it’s fine, that stuff is complicated! I can go get the-“ Elric rose from his chair.

“Sit down!” Eve hissed. He threw himself back in the chair. 

“I just need a second, I can get it.” Eve rested their non-bloody hand on their temples. The array was a bit bloody now, but the blood on their knuckles was mostly dry. 

It wasn’t about the bleeding, not anymore. Eve could do this, they knew they could. They could be a being of pure energy. They could be an aristocratic puppet, they could be the perfect daughter, this was no different. They could be pure energy, they just had to let it happen. They couldn’t fail! Not again.

They forced their thoughts clear, focusing on their hand. On its energy, on how it moved and bent. The sparks they felt when alchemy would run between their fingers, the power they felt. The power they had, only them. Selim couldn’t do this. Selim couldn’t play this game, couldn’t flow like water, Eve could.

Eve could do whatever the hell they wanted, and they wanted this. Selim lived life easy, he never had to work, but Eve. Eve knew how to work. Eve could work for whatever the fuck they wanted. 

Then Eve felt something, tingling, and numbness in their fingers, the array began to light up. They felt it like their hands were threaded together. It was different than alchemy, sparked filled the air but couldn’t feel them. The array turning bright blue, and heavy numb climbing their arm. Their arm felt like it was melding into the table in front of them, yet it moved like nothing.

The imaginary threads of their arm lit up, a strange green flashed in their mind. The blue light mending the flesh of their knuckles. They were doing it! They were totally doing it. They knew it, and Major Elric and Selim were just two big idiots who can’t do anything short of alchemy. Eve, Eve could do whatever the hell they wanted!

Consumed by their own hubris, they looked up to Major Elric to see the dumbfounded look on his stupid face. The array broke, their eyes widening and mouth gaping open, though it was only a second, it felt like minutes.

His face was in awe, but behind him was a black mass, covered in hundreds of dots, fear, Eve felt so much fear. Thick, fear, they couldn’t breathe. Round, like eyes, human eyes, wide and begging-

A spark flashed through them and they yelped, bringing their arm defensively to their side. 

“Eve! Are you okay?” Major Elric shouted. 

“Yeah… I’m…” they nervously looked back to him, he was- he was fine. Nothing behind him, his face laced in a mix of concern and confusion. Did they just imagine it? But- they looked down at their left hand. It didn’t hurt at all. 

The numbing fading from their arm. Major Elric handed them the damp cloth, they cleaned the blood from their knuckles. The cold feeling was a rush to their numb limb. Their wound, however, was completely gone! 

They did it! The darkness of their mood washed away, a wide smile on their lips. They looked up to Major Elric.”How’s this for incapable! Look! Look!” shoved their knuckles dangerously close to his face. He yanked his head back. 

“Wow, you really did it! That’s incredible.” He said, mouth a bit ajar.

“Told you I could, don’t doubt me next time.” Eve smiled laughed, leaning back and closing their arms. What were they even worried about, that was easy! 

Major Elric clearly isn’t as skilled an alchemist as he thought. “I can show you how it works? If you want.” They mused.

Major Elric laughed.”I think I’m good, I could never get it to work even with a teacher. You make it look so easy.”

“Oh~ is it supposed to be hard?” Eve hummed a finger to their chin playfully. 

Major Elric twitched. “Okay, I get it. I’m a big idiot.” He bit back. He took the pins from the table and tossed them back into the box.

Eve glanced off to the garden, watching Selim’s hubris on full display as he drew an array in the dirt. Their mother, Dante, watching with a group of military and black tie aristocrats. All to make a stupid bird out of stone. That was nothing compared to human alteration.

“I take it alkahestry interests you.” Elric hummed.

“A bit, I mean I do have a knack for it.” They replied, still watching the garden, lax with satisfaction.

“You can have these if you would like, I have no use for them.” Elric pushed the journal and box of needles forwards. 

Eve's eyes snapped to them. “Really?” 

“Yeah, I mean you may have to wash them, that is if you want them-“ 

“No! No! I want them!” They pulled themselves up, hands on the table brimming with excitement.

The major simply smiled, a small laugh leaving his lips. “Well, they’re fair game, the journal too. I can’t do much with the knowledge anyway.” He shrugged.

Eve looked down to them, the table was still a mess. The tiny holes from needles and bloodstains were hard to miss. They picked up the journal as if it were a priceless heirloom. Their hands had no more blood on them, so they flipped through the pages lightly. 

Hundreds of arrays and Xingese lay on the pages, the notes half Xingese half Ametrisian. “The first few pages show how to read Xingese, it’s the first thing I learned.” Elric answered their question before they asked. His voice was more distant as he was now taking the bloody cloth to the empty sink. 

“Wow…” was all they could say. A whole new door had opened in front of them. This changed things, so many things, there were so many opportunities! They could study dad’s notes, shove it in Selim’s fac-Selim? It would only take Selim a few minutes to decode the journal and their father’s notes. 

Eve grabbed the box, they weren’t going to let that happen. Eve was just as much an alchemist as he was, they could prove it! They had the resources to prove it. Even if the journal was a dud, it was more than they had before. They could decode the Xingese at the very least. 

They got up from the table, Elric was washing the cloth. They quickly walked up the wooden stairs, journal in hand and box in the other. Eve sprinted as soon as they got to their room and slammed the brown door behind them. This was one of the few times they were grateful for such an empty house. Even Elric likely couldn’t hear them from downstairs. 

They burst open their dresser and shuffled the socks and stockings back. Hiding the journal and box of pins before throwing some socks over for good measure. That should keep it away from Selim and their mother. Laundry was your own job and no one touched their drawers but them. They made sure of that, their room was their own space.

They rushed downstairs, where Elric was already cleaning off the table. He had grabbed a spare cloth from the ones hanging over the sink. Mom would kill Eve if she knew a dishwashing towel was used on the table, but they didn’t care. If she got mad Eve could blame her boy toy. 

“You don’t have to do that.” They stated. 

“The mess is mostly my fault, it’s the least I can do.” The Major replied, picking up the damp cloth. The table was as clean as before the pair entered. 

“You’re weird, Major Elric.” They laughed. They grabbed the dishwashing towel from him and went for the other one in the sink. 

“I get that often.” He replied sarcastically. 

“That isn’t a good thing.” Eve mused, taking both clothes to the hamper hidden in the back of the pantry. It as mainly for dish towels, since the laundry room within the basement.

“It never really is.” Major Elric replied Eve didn’t hear him. 

Eve returned to the kitchen to see Major Elric at the door to the garden. “Wait-“ they stopped him, just before his hand touched the knob. 

“Don’t tell Selim-or anyone- about what just happened. Selim isn’t a fan of alkahestry and neither is mom.” They lied.

“Don’t worry, I won’t.” He smiled, cracking open the door.

“Promise! I really don’t want to get in trouble.” They continued, the more desperate the better, especially since it would be his fault if he told. 

“I swear on my life not to tell anyone what happened in this kitchen with Eve Hohenheim.” He put a hand to his chest. “Or let me anyone know I told her of anything of Alkahestry or my studies, nor did she see me stealing food. Fair?” 

Eve smiled. “Fair.” Sure, ‘stealing’. Still, they let him have it.

The man left for the garden, Eve checked over the kitchen. Once they knew it was completely clean and the dishes Elric used rewashed and put away, they too left for the garden. 

Maybe garden parties weren’t so bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drew Eve from this chapter! 
> 
> https://tinyurl.com/evegardenparty


	2. Rage, Rage, Against The Dying of the Light.

Selim watched Eve in the garden. It had been many months since their last garden party and their mother wasn’t well enough to tend to the garden herself. Eve carried that burden with pride and Selim smiled at how confident his sibling was.

The sunlight beat down at the garden, it was already mid-June. 

Three months, three months of constant travel and studying. Three months, night after night spent in tutors’ homes and the hotels of Central. Three months of day-long ventures in Central Library, digging up everything he could. Three months of their mothers smile slowly withering with pain.

Three months… since their mother had fallen ill. 

Despite every doctor in central telling them, she wouldn’t make it, he knew better. Nothing was impossible, it was simply easier to give up. Doctors work for money, a difficult patient isn’t worth the money. Selim could see it in their eyes, the words were never true. They were alchemists, him and Eve, impossible was simply another obstacle.

Eve had a strong type of confidence in them as well as they had a trick up their sleeve. Maybe they did. He didn’t bother Eve about their alchemy studies. He didn’t mind seeing them in and out or their father's office, or finding journals missing for short periods of time. 

Alkahestry books usually or books of his fathers travel to the east. He was happy for them, he thought as he leaned forward in his chair, Eve had found their passion. A spark, a hope. Eve was always independent. They kept their passions to themselves, but their strengths lie elsewhere. Eve’s memory was sloppy, bits and pieces melded in their head. 

Eve wasn’t on Selim’s alchemic level. They never had to be, nor were they interested in it. They had their own life, their own passions. The garden was one, the home another, alkahestry the most recent piece. 

Eve grabbed some branch cutters from their brown cargo pants. Their white shirt covered in dirt stains, their chest was flat and the shirt was baggier than before. It didn’t stretch, did it? He could always get them a new one. No, that shirt fit a week ago, he remembered them taking it to hang. 

He made a mental note to ask them.

Eve was nearly twelve now and spent most of their time in their room or with their mother. It was part of being a normal teenager, right? Being a shut-in? Eve was hardly a teenager. Selim was barely one himself, he was only fourteen. It must be a maturity factor, their mother did raise them to be well mannered and diligent.

Selim picked up his journal from the side glass table. The only reason he had been in and out of Central constantly was that it was too dangerous for his tutors to see his mother this way. That didn’t stop them from asking why she had been so quiet the last few months, Dante was far from a shut-in. For such a socialite to vanish, with only a letter, was disgraceful. What else could be done, their mother’s men had stopped sending things after the first month. They held no real respect for Eve or his mother, after everything she had done.

He had returned from a week-long trip just yesterday, it was nice to let himself go. He hadn’t stopped worrying about his mother's sickness. With the constant questioning he couldn’t, at least his tutors had taken the hint. Luckily he had little to worry about, Eve took excellent care of the pair’s mother. There wasn’t a day he came home that Eve wasn’t at her bedside, or walking her to her room, making her food. His mother wanted him to focus on his studies and he was always so happy to share his findings. He hoped Eve was having wonderful findings as well. 

He gazed down at the notes his tutor had written down. He smirked eyeing places the tutor had gotten parts wrong, Madam Rosalind was always atrocious at history. He set the book down in disinterest, checking up on his caring sibling.

They appeared to be shaking at the basin faucet at the side of the garden. ‘It’s always something isn’t it’ Selim sighed. It was like he never even left, he hummed to himself. 

He got up from his chair and strolled over to his disgruntled sibling .“You’re going to bend it again.” He warned blankly. 

Eve glanced over to him, eyes full of annoyance. “The damn thing is broken again.” They spit back. Shaking the faucet once more for good measure.

“That isn’t going to help, I can fix it-“ Before Selim could finish, Eve raised their finger. 

“-Can fix it with alchemy. Right?” They crossed their arms mockingly, their grown out blonde hair dancing of their shoulders.”Won’t be broken if that worked, would it?” They mused.

Selim rolled his eyes, he didn’t need sass he was offering to help.”Maybe it kept breaking because you keep insisting on abusing it?” He replied absently, a thin smile on his lips. 

“Or maybe you’re just bad at fixing it, _Mister Alchemist_.” They mocked, letting their body lax. 

“Then fix it yourself, if you could do so much better.” He snarked, leaning toward them with his hands to his sides. It was just like Eve to whine about needing his help. He never understood why they didn’t just ask, though he could blame that on their hubris. 

Eve shot daggers at him. “Fine, I will.” They hissed. They turned the handle to the faucet. Water dripped out slowly, they were silent, eyes locked to each clear droplet. Their hand to their face, deep in thought. Selim raises a finger, but Eve shushed him without so much as turning to face him.

For a few seconds, all he could hear was the wind bouncing off of the trees, distant wind chimes from the front garden, and the weak echo of the sporadic drops hitting the deep metal basin. Eve’s face took on a devilish look, and they swung their long leg back, slamming it into the faucet with a crack of metal that bounces off the basin. Water began to blast out like a cannon, shooting into the basin. 

Selim’s eyes were wide with an expression laced in concern and wonderment. Eyes darting between the faucet and his sibling's leg. Eve slowly turned to face him, a smug grin on their face. A smug nonchalant grin, a chord struck in Selim. “There, fixed it.” 

“You’re going to break your leg if you keep doing that!” Selim snapped. Selim didn’t have to ask how Eve stumbled upon that solution. The better question would be how the faucet was still there, the metal on the bottom was far to thinned out to be kicked like that. If Eve has been doing this all week it was amazing it hadn’t bent sideways already.

Eve’s eyes were wide before tightened into a deep grimace, pupils thin as pins. They simply turned away to pick up the empty watering can next to them. Selim’s expression pricked up to his sibling. 

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll be fine. I have my ways.” They mused, throwing his concern behind them. Swaying the watering can to their side laxly as they neared the basin.

Selim straightened up and tighten a look on his impulsive sibling. “You can’t rely on Alkahestry for everything.”

They froze in their tracks, the watering can tighten in their fingers. They didn’t turn to face him, their body rattling lightly and slouching low. Selim could see their expressions from behind them, but he could feel the tension. “And why is that?” They spit, with an intensity Selim wasn’t used too.

Selim blinked in surprise. Why were they being so aggressive? It was just Alkahestry, it was for small wounds. Eve should be smart enough to know it can’t fix a split leg. It was just another subform of alchemy, alchemy was since not miracle. Selim was careful with his words, stern and intentional.”You can’t rely on alkahestry to heal a limb so easily. It is alchemy, and healing takes energy, for each exchange is an equal or equivalent exchange. You are the one studying father’s journals. They speak clearly and firmly of overstepping alchemy’s boundaries, _especially_ on human matter.” 

Eve didn’t reply, they didn’t return to face him. The basin was filling slowly, the drain unable to check up to be pummeling water. He could hear Eve’s heavy breathing, he took a step closer to his tense sibling.

“Eve, it’s really not a big deal. These are simple mistakes-“ he began again, softening his voice. 

Eve lifted the empty metal can, Selim’s eyes widened, meeting Eve’s for a split second. Their eyes sharp like daggers, their arms heaving the metal can behind them. Selim threw himself back but it was too late, the side of the can smashing into his forehead. A loud crack shot up through the sound of running water. 

He hit the ground like a brick. 

——————————

Eve’s anger was still blistering inside of them. They felt red like their insides were burning flames. Eyes gazed down to their brother, their whole body shaking under their own weight. Their mouth was stapled shut, their eyes were sewn open. The watering can was dripping.

‘The basin will overflow soon.’ Was all their thoughts could muster. Their body moved on autopilot, slowly turning the crank. A lock of hair fell on their face, it was getting long again. The watering can was wet. 

Selim was wet too. 

Eve stared at the faucet, they didn’t understand how kicking it helped. It felt good to kick it, it…

Their hands were shaking, their hands were shaking and they couldn’t stop it. The faucet, the faucet was leaking again. On the ground next to them, soft hair over the open slit spout, his faucet was leaking. They couldn’t kick it, that won’t work, it would make it worse! They would make it worse again but It won’t stop leaking! He was going to run dry and it’s all _their fault_.

They turned behind them, Selim’s blood was staining the grass. He was moving, breathing. He wasn’t dead, the grass was red like roses, like their mother’s roses. Their hands wouldn’t obey them. They were glued to the can and their fingers were wet.

Why can’t they move? Why can’t they fix this? They need to fix this, they need to fix this now!! They need-

Their legs were shaking, they couldn’t keep their balance. Screaming ran through their head, screaming and cracking and screaming and cracking and _screaming and cracking and..._

The watering can fell, the handle decorated in long elegant drips of red, complementing the large red spatter on its metal bottom.

Eve lost breath. 

Eve lost balance. 

They were laying right next to Selim. 

Selim was losing blood. 

Their vision was blurry, their hands heavy as lead. Their fingers were dripping red, shaking like they would come off any moment. They couldn’t hear their breath, the blood was making it hard to hear. 

Selim was losing blood. 

Their vision was too blurry, their finger in the dirt below them. There was too much blood on him, they couldn’t draw. There wasn’t time, they could see. Their hand was shaking so much they couldn’t see the circle.

Selim was losing blood.

They kept going, all they had was their memory to guide them. Eyes desperately trying to seal themselves shut. They felt so heavy, their lungs had forgotten how to function. What had they done!? What had they done!? 

The circle was done, it began to glow. Their vision was too fogged to see the sparks, they felt them. They felt the spikes morph from the ground. Their mouth won’t open for air, all they could smell was iron. 

Selim’s eyes weren’t opening, why weren’t they opening!? Wake up! They bite their lip hard, feeling their face get wetter. Sweat dripped down their red tear stricken face. Their raised the bloody pins in their fingers. 

‘Like a star, five points, like a star, five points…’ They repeated, hearing Major Elric’s calm voice. Their fingers shook, their vision fumbled, they stick in the first pin. Right under the hairline. 

The next on to the bottom left of it, the red made it hard to see, Selim’s eyes won’t open. They didn’t want to hit his eyes, their hand won’t stabilize. They couldn’t fail, Selim won’t fail he won’t… 

They placed the third pin on the opposite corner. His breathing was getting slow. They force their eyes back open, scrambling fingers for the fourth pin.

Did they only alchemize three! No, they couldn’t have, Selim was going to die! He is going to fucking die and it’s all their fault! It’s all their fault they killed him! They fucking k-

They found the fourth pin, forcing it down on the lower right. They didn’t have time! The fourth one took too long to find, they forced their fingernail though the left side completing the star. The coldness of blood sending a chill through their heavy body.

It lit up instantly, the numbness shooting through their finger silencing the cold. Lights connecting together into a circle on his forehead, the light reflecting into their eyes like a blessing. 

Numbness crawled through their hand, weighing their body down in a different way. Something quaked beneath them. It was familiar but strong. Their elevated heartbeat slowed, syncing up to the quaking running into them. The light of the array was losing color, Selim’s breathing grew faster. 

The color was forming behind him, inside of him. Tendrils of lemon yellow curled around and through him. They felt stern, safe. While green slithered around their fingertips connecting the dying circle, bright vibrant green that felt like spider legs. For a moment Eve swore they were weightless. 

The array fizzled out and reality fizzled back in. The colors swept away with the wind and Eve’s finger fell down past Selim’s face to the ground. Their vision blurred once more, Selim’s eyes twitched-Selim! He was alive, he was okay!

They did it! They did it! They saved him, but, they…

Their eyes won’t stay open any longer. They shouldn’t have, had to save him… They saved him because he was going to die-because of Eve. Eve saved their own skin, Eve…

The darkness was creeping in, Eve could finally breathe. Their thoughts being drowned along with them, Eve tried to kill their own brother. 

What kind of monster were they? What would their mother say? In the darkness of the sewn shut eyes, the deep yellow of the sun peeking through their lids.

They were tired, so tired. They couldn’t rest, not now! They just needed to breathe, to catch themselves. Selim was okay, they knew he was okay, his breathing was steady. 

Eve was not. As soon as their mother found out, they would have no future. They had the right too, what kind of monster kills their own brother!? Even with Selim breathing next to them, they could still smell iron. They couldn’t pretend what happened seconds ago was a dream, they knew their mother won’t.

Their mother, they could feel it, see the disgust in her eyes. The disgust they deserved, laid upon them. The way she spoke of Selim with pride in her voice. His achievements, his letters, his voice, it brought a smile to her face Eve thought was long dead. A smile lost since their childhood, from distant laughs of jokes between two lovers, a smile reserved for someone great. Someone who never spoke to Eve, yet the times he did leave them feeling a certain type of recognition. That someone Selim sculpted his life to Selim earned that weightless smile. The smile that cradled the room in soft light, held together by all that remained of the true Dante Hohenheim. 

Eve wanted that light more than anything, to simply bask in it was a delight unworthy of them. Now all that was left of that light had nearly fizzled into nothingness, all because they couldn’t keep their temper in check. Their mother deserved to distrust them, Selim was right to as well. Eve was a ticking bomb, tying down their family’s future. 

Then why was Eve so scared? Why did the thought of their mother’s smile withering away in front of them burn so much? Her eyes were wide in shock and fear of her own child, her feral child, who had only made her life worse. She still believed in Eve, believed she had made a difference. That was all she had left, no men, no husband, not even his letter, it was just them.

Eve couldn’t bear to break their poor mother when she was all shattered glass, they couldn’t. They couldn’t lose Selim when he was all the family they would have left. 

They couldn’t bear being alone, even the days of tending to their mother dug into them. Her empty eyes, pale skin, watching Eve as if they were a miracle. Her smile as she had someone, anyone, to speak too, even if her voice was losing her. The stories she told Eve and no one else because she knew her days were numbered.

One day that room will be empty, Selim will be gone. He will be out, being successful just like their father. He was already well on his way, he would easily become a state alchemist. He was overqualified and even his maturity was level with his fellow future employers. He knew their language, their alchemy, their rules, he even wore the same blue.

Eve had no future. They could be a nurse...no, no, they couldn’t care for people, all they could do was hurt them. They were a child, a child with a family that had no reason to love them. They didn’t know the real Eve, or maybe they pretended not to. No one knew the real Eve: A feral brat who kicked and screamed when things didn’t go their way, a liar who leached off of other’s love. Who could only beg to cling to the shadows of those with rich lives and futures? 

No one wanted the real Eve. 

The truth was a stain in the grass that reflected off sunlight. The truth was their stain.

They opened their eyes. Their brother still breathing slowly. He seemed lost in a dream, Eve hoped it was pleasant. He would hate them once he woke up, Dante would as well. Eve counted their blessings as they slipped through their fingers. 

The least they could do was clean the garden. 

———————————

Selim’s eyes slid open, his head was pounding. It appeared he was in his room but wasn’t he just downstairs in the kitchen? When had he gone back up? 

He pulled himself up, the covers conforming to move with him. His head felt like it had been slammed into a brick wall and sure enough, when he rubbed it he felt a bandage.

When did that happen? He slowly turned to get a full scope of his darkened room. Selim didn’t need the light, his alchemy pushed him to gain excellent night vision. His bedside table had a full cup of water next to it, occupying a cup of writing utensils. The window with gold lace curtains pushed open, the moon peeking through a cloudy night sky. A bookshelf full of books and journals was right in front of the bed, and his brown wooden wardrobe was at the end of his wall near the door. The door with golden knob was a crack open, letting in a stream of light from the hall. 

His shirt was a long sleeve, he was in a bottom-up2 shirt when he was in the kitchen. Did someone change it? Who? And why? It must have something to do with the bandage, he must have been bleeding. To dig up the memories only made his headache multiply. He picked up the water from the bedside table and gulped it down, he would have to ask Eve tomorrow morning. 

He curled back down in his bed, wrapping his blanket around him. It smelt like a car shop, he tried his best to ignore the unpleasant scent. 

After a few minutes- or maybe hours? He couldn’t tell. He realized he was not heading back to sleep. His stomach growled and his head wasn’t feeling much better. Maybe after some food and then he could go back to bed. 

He slowly left his bed and headed down the stairs. The light in the kitchen appeared to still be on, so it couldn’t be too late. It was likely his sibling Eve, making dinner or studying. 

He walked past the sitting room, the glass patio door giving a grand view of the night sky. The light of the kitchen reflection obscuring the rest of the view, he could see Eve’s figure reflected in the pane. It was slumped down but stood up quickly as the real Eve saw him from the kitchen table. 

Their eyes were wide and distant like they were tracing a horrid thought. “Sel-Selim.” The barely mouthed, words thick to their lips.

The injury must have been worse than he thought. His sibling knew alkahestry, so he couldn’t make out how much of it was healed already. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t sleep.” He admitted guilty.

Eve didn’t move, their eyes still glued to him.”I know...Selim?” 

Selim quirked an eyebrow, something definitely happened. He’s never seen his sibling look this fearful before. It only made his concern tighten, knotting tight in his chest.

“I would understand.” Was all his sibling could say. 

Selim’s expression pinched together. “Understand? Does this have to do with the accident?” It had to, why else would Eve mention it. Was it just an accident? He only had one wound? How much of him was healed?

Eve nodded, “it’s a part of it, b-but it’s always been more than that. I just…you have every right to feel the way you do…” 

“Eve… What happened? I want you to be honest with me.” Selim softly demanded. Eve had clearly done something, something bad from how it sounds. 

Eve blinked a bit, their gaze shifted down. “I got mad, and you got hurt. I’m sorry but it’s exactly what you remember, I’m sorry I did it. I didn’t mean too, I know fixing it doesn’t mean shit, you have the right to hate me!” Eve blurted out. Their eyes refused to face them but their voice was full of emotion.

“Eve… I don’t-“ He recalled the basin. He was around it, Eve…

Eve kicked the basin, right in front of him. It was a metal basin? But the faucet was old and rusted at the bottom. He remembered than when he last fixed it, they must have-

It all clicked. No wonder Eve felt so bad, they had no idea the faucet was so thin at the bottom. Selim didn’t tell them he took material from the bottom to fix it last time, they must have thought the metal was sturdy.

A metal pipe to the face, it made perfect sense to him. “Eve, it wasn’t your fault. You had no idea that would happen, you were just trying to fix the faucet.” It was true, it was in no way their fault. The faucets weak base was all on the hands of Selim’s alchemy. 

Eve didn’t respond. They turned up to face him, eyes redden with tears. “You don’t have to lie to me! I’m not a child, I can take it!” They bit back, their face betrayed their words.

Selim sighed softly. “No, I was just as much my fault as it was yours. When I fixed the faucet I never told you how weak metal was. I should have warned you, then it wouldn’t have come off.” Even if they did fix it, the metal would only bend once more. 

Eve stared blankly at him, a small broken smile creased their lips, their eye twitched. “Ha...hahaha...haahahhaaha!!”’ They burst out, a hand cradling their face. “You’re such an idiot!” 

“I’m not an idiot, I made a stupid mistake. You’re the one who solves all their problems with assault. Now stop laughing, I have a headache.” He hissed back playfully, he made mistakes but he certainly wasn’t an idiot.

“Yeah…” they snorted. “I really do, don’t I?” A weak smile hit their lips, more soft and welcoming. “Sorry about the headache.” There was a different look in their eyes now, and their tone leveled. 

“How deep was it?” He asked seriously. 

“It wasn’t to the bone, maybe just broken skin. I healed it right away so I couldn’t tell. There was too much blood.” They answered. 

That was a problem, Selim noted. He could easily be concussed, alkahestry didn’t help brain injuries. “Is mother awake?”

“Why?” Eve asked, stringing up a bit.

“I could have a concussion Eve, we need to go to the hospital to check it out,” Selim stated, had his sibling really just thought he would sleep off a head injury? Either that or they had far too much faith in alkahestry. 

“We? Mother can’t-“ Eve began. 

Selim quickly cut them off, taking authority. “Yes we, I don’t recall what happened and you would notice first if I start to act strange. Those are very obvious symptoms of concussions, I’d expect you to know that.” 

Eve’s eyes sharpen at the statement, but just as quickly returned to normal. “Right, we’ll tell mom tomorrow morning. Someone will have to be home to watch her-“ 

Selim didn’t seem to skip a beat.”I can take care of that. We can be in central by tomorrow afternoon no problem.” 

“But-“ Eve began.

“But nothing. I’m no good to anyone concussed, much less you and mother. What time is it?” He continued.

Eve sat back down at their chair. “Ten at night.” 

Selim smiled, later than he thought but knowing her, she would be wide awake. He was thankful tomorrow was Sunday. He turned away from the kitchen, food wasn’t important anymore, he had a call to make. 

————————————

Eve watched the sunset that morning. The oranging of the sky was a bittersweet reminder of their sleepless night. Selim really didn’t remember? Or was he lying to spare their feelings? No, he won’t do that. He had all the reason to tear them to shreds for what they had done.

What if he remembered once he woke up? Would Eve still come with him to Central? Was it a trap? Would he bother with that? If he wanted to trap Eve he won’t need help. Unless he wanted to force them into central. By anyone’s regards, they were a murderer. 

Not that it mattered now, what’s done is done. All Eve could do was wait for it to all come crashing down on them. There was nothing more to it than that. 

Time can’t be undone, words cannot be unwritten, and wounds cannot fizzle away. A wound was carried with their memories, even without a scar it would remain. Alkahestry cannot mend human memories. 

Eve got up from the bed, deciding to make use of the calm before the storm. They threw on a knee-length pale blue casual dress, with a button-up collar and long cuffed sleeves that gave the sleeves a mild poofing off the shoulders. They loathed the dress, but their mother absolutely adorned them in it. They combed their just over the shoulder-length blonde hair and pulled it back with a large fishtail braid laced with glossy blue ribbon. They would rather be presentable the last time they see their mother, for her own sake.

It didn’t take long to start breakfast, eggs were cooking in the pan next to the kettle brewing. Their mother always had more herbal teas and dried herbs from the garden mixed with dried orange peels made a wonderful morning tea. It was one of the few things Eve could pride themselves with, and a cup of tea would ease their stress after a long day. 

Not that it would help today, but it was fun to play pretend. To look out to the garden like guests were only moments away, to hear their mother's voice bellow from upstairs to clean everything short of the pipes. They could imagine her messy brown bun, her annoyance at Eve for their rowdy locks of hair and off-color dress. Selim’s thin smile as he focused on his reading, his pale brown hair messy on his head. 

It only took Selim a few minutes to look presentable. 

Eve watched the garden for a few seconds more, who would've thought they would miss those days that dragged on forever. What a fool they were. 

They checked up on the eggs, they were a little burnt on the edges. They scooped them up and moved them to a plate, breaking more eggs into the hot pan. The tea would be ready soon and Selim wasn’t up yet. 

Selim wouldn’t want any tea, maybe he was speaking with mother. Telling her the truth about her murderer of a daughter, who wanted to let him suffer from his concussion so he could die twice. If only it was that much of a blessing, to keep her look of disgust and shame out of Eve’s eyes. Selim won’t give them that dignity. Eve didn’t deserve that dignity. 

The eggs were starting to burn, Eve moved them. 

The morning continued. 

Soon all the eggs were cooked, enough for Eve and their mother and brother. Selim was still absent from the table, so they ate their own portion in the meantime. They had a cup of orange herbal tea and toast with their eggs, by the time they were done the kitchen was still quiet. 

It was nearly 8 am, Selim should have been up by now. They resisted the urge to check on him if he was speaking to mother they couldn’t disturb. Even if it killed them inside, it would only ever make things worse. 

If he wasn’t down in the next few minutes they would go get him, no matter what. He was still injured, after all, he could be worse for wear, not that they could fix it if he was.

Brrrrinnng! The phone from the front rang, making Eve jump from their skin. Who the hell was calling? Mother’s suitors haven't called in weeks. The phone rang again. Eve made haste toward it. 

They picked it up slowly.”Hello? This is Dante Van Hohenheim’s residence. This is her daughter Eve speaking.” 

A voice picked up on the line, smooth through the connection fizzle. “Hello, this is Lieutenant Colonel Solaris. Is Selim around? I wish to speak to him.” Solaris, that name sounded familiar, but if she was looking for Selim she must be who he called last night.

“I’m afraid Selim is still resting. I can wake him and have him call you back if you like?” They replied.

“No, no that is quite alright. You are his sister correct? You are both coming to Central?” Solaris asked.

“Yes, so long as someone is here to look after our mother.” They replied, if she was taking them then maybe they could figure out who would be watching their mother. Not that they trusted any military rat, but at least an idea would help them.

“Yes, Trisha will be coming with me.” She said as if the name mattered to Eve.

“Who?” Eve replied before they could catch themselves. 

“Oh, She is a highly reliable nurse who specializes in hospice care. You have nothing to worry about.” She replied calmly. _Hospice_!? Of course, that’s the nurse Selim would trust, he never had faith in his own mother’s recovery.

Eve bit back their spite. “Fine. What did you call about?” 

“We may be showing up earlier than expected. Trisha is worried about Selim’s condition and would like to see him as soon as possible. We will be there in under an hour. Don’t worry about being ready for us, this is an early notice and we’re sorry to inconvenience you like this.” She said sweetly, embarrassment shown through her voice. Great, an hour before more military dogs were are their door, of course, they needed Eve in Central to do anything. At least they were both women, Eve could handle a couple of high strung fake military bitches. 

Eve cloaked their voice in kindness.”It’s no problem at all. A concussion is pretty serious, I’ll wake Selim up and we’ll be ready as soon as you arrive.” 

For a moment the line was nothing but fuzz until a new voice picked up. “That won’t be necessary, let him get his rest. We will be over soon.” It was a sweet voice, far less smooth than the other one. It sounded a bit older, it must have been Trisha, then.

“Okay. Thank you for coming on such late notice. See you soon.” Eve hummed sweetly, before slamming the phone shut. 

Eve didn’t believe for a second it would only be two women in the car. Selim must have felt Eve’s suspicion and demanded they come sooner. As if he was really going to try to arrest them and drag them back to Central with a hospice nurse and a whore who would probably cry over a paper cut. 

A Lieutenant Colonel was just military terms for advanced paperwork organizer. As far as Eve knew most of the women with titles like that either killed for it or fucked for it. With a voice like that and a name like Solaris, which now that Eve thought about it, they had met once and wore quite the outfit. She was definitely the latter.

——————————————-

Mother was still asleep and Selim's head felt worse than the night before. He leaned against the wall in the hall across her room. He could smell the food downstairs but wasn’t really interested in engaging his sibling just yet. 

The phone going off downstairs made him jump in his skin and he slightly cursed at himself for being so sensitive. At least they would be going to central soon because it seemed he needed a hospital more than he’d like to admit. Trisha should be coming along as well, and with her knowledge and experience, there wouldn't be a problem. He creaked the door open to his mother’s room, even in her sound sleep he could see how terribly unwell she was. 

Her eyes were like the deep chasms and her skin was reddened with cold but ash white everywhere else. Her lips appeared chapped and he could see her brittle fingers crawl out of her layers of blankets. Eve had been seeing her like this every day, it must have been killing them inside. Her dark brown hair tangled over her face, her cheekbones far more apparent that they should be. Eve mentioned she wasn’t eating much, Selim had no idea it was to this extent. 

He closed the door slowly, the door squawked shut. He knew he didn’t look great himself, and the thought of going downstairs and eating only made him nauseous. He crept back to his room, creaking open the journal on his bedside table.

Reading was a strain, his focus flashing in and out, making the words bend and sway. It was one of his father's journals, it told of alchemy but most of all of his life. A life Selim only knew through distant memories and his writings on the pages. He had led a life far beyond Selim, his father was a traveler, a master alchemist with stories Selim almost didn’t believe. His father spoke like he had lived hundreds of lives, Selim could hardly live one. His father would never let a simple injury stop him, and Selim vowed to be more than his father ever had.

Selim would make stories his father would be proud of, wherever he was.

Sometime later, Selim heard a knocking on the door. He promptly set down his book, the call must have been from Solaris then. She was only thirty minutes from his family home after all. He rose from the bed, wincing as his head rejected the movement. He could hear footsteps from downstairs and the door cracked open. Any voices were too muddled to translate. 

He slowly crept out of his room and to the hall banister. It was wooden with gold lacing, he rested his hands on the smooth wood banister looking down to the foyer. 

Sure enough, there was Solaris at the door, in her military uniform and her wavy black hair in a long side ponytail. Trisha was alongside her, with deep green eyes burdened with age, her hair in a tight bun. She was wearing a white button-up and a long blue skirt, she had a large bag with her. Eve held the door open for them as the pair entered, he could feel his sibling's eyes follow the uniform. 

Trisha’s eyes met Selim, lips pouting with concern. She glanced over to Solaris, nodding to her, before turning to Eve. “I’ll be with you in one moment, I can answer your questions then.” That seemed to irritate his younger sibling. 

Selim sighed, they had no idea how lucky they were, if they thought their mother’s scoldings were-“Selim Van Hohenheim.” And she was already right behind him. Her eyes filled with the rage only a mother could have. 

“Now,” Selim began. “I’ll have you know I didn’t c-“ her expression tightened. 

“Room. Now.” She demanded, Selim quickly obliged. 

In a matter of seconds, they were in his room, she was shuffling through her leather bag of medical supplies, Selim absently watching. 

“-just headaches? Have you eaten anything yet?” Another rapid-fire question, she had been berating him since they entered his room.

“No. I’m too nauseous.” He replied.

“So you lied to me? You said you only had headaches.” She scolded. 

“Well- it’s not exactly-“ 

“Where did you get hit?” She sent another question his way, his words fizzled away.

“Around the center of the forehead-“ he began again.

“By a metal pipe? And you decided to keep this information hidden until now?” She asked sharply.

“It didn’t seem relevant over the phone.” He admitted guilty.

“How is that not relevant to you?! I _should_ have been here last night.” She pulled a bottle out of her bag along with some gauze.

“I didn’t want to disturb you-“ He began, shutting down the moment she shoots a menacing glare at him.

“You could be bleeding internally but heavens no, respect my privacy while you die due to your own incompetence.” 

“I am not incompetent!” Selim shot back. Her look didn’t break. 

“Hold still.” She demanded, Selim obliged reluctantly. She dropped the contents of the bottle onto the cotton pad, setting it aside in the bedside table. Then began to unwind the red-stained bandage on Selim's head, tossing it on to the floor. She grabbed the wet cotton pad and cleaned his red-stained forehead. 

Her eyes widened. "Incredible…” She muttered, then tightened once more. “This is from yesterday? Correct?” 

His own dark gold eyes locking with her green ones. “Yes, yesterday morning. I wasn’t here until yesterday morning.” He scoffed. It didn’t amuse her. 

“Yesterday morning? Well then, Hohenheim, you either have the healing of a god or you’re lying to me.” She shot back skeptically. 

“Excuse me?” Healing of a god, so what it wasn’t bleeding?

“This wound is scarred over.” She replied bluntly like he was to know that. 

His eyes widened in surprise, he would have to check the mirror later. “I see…” his expression twisted into a focused gaze. “Eve did use Alkahestry on it, before bandaging it.”

“Alkahestry? You didn’t tell me your sister knew alkahestry.” She said, almost unfazed.

“They dabble in it, but it only mended the surface.” He replied.

Trisha removed the bloody cotton ball, her eyes lowering in thought. “I see, best we get you to Central then. Any injuries you may still have can’t be treated here.” 

Selim nodded slowly, his headache still slamming into him. Trisha took a small cloth bag from her leather one, and dropped the bloody bandages in it, along with the stained cotton pad. “I’d suggest you drink something if you can, and eat before we leave. It will be a hard ride to Central.” Trisha stated, placing the rest of the stuff in her bag. 

“I need to speak with mother before I go. She doesn’t know me and Eve are leaving.” Selim rose from the bed. 

Trisha simply nodded. “Take as long as you need.” She zipped up her bag and slugged it over her shoulders. 

Selim made his way back to the balcony. He walked down the steps, his sibling was in the kitchen washing dishes. Solaris was at the table with a cup of tea still hot in her hand. She met Selim’s gaze with a smile. 

“Trisha says we are good to go to Central.” He said, grabbing a plate from the cabinet. “We just need to tell mother where we’re going.” 

“I told her last night when I gave her her medicine,” Eve replied softly. 

Solaris took a sip of her tea, eyeing Eve lightly. Eve shrank down, focusing more intently on the dishes. Selim frowned, he didn’t recall if Eve went to bed before or after him. He put some cold eggs on his plate, that was all he could stomach. 

“Did you? I don’t recall seeing you near her room last night? Or any medicine with her this morning.” Selim inquired, it was clear from his sibling's spike of the shoulders he had gotten a reaction. 

“I told her you needed to take me to Central. That someone would be watching her. We should be good to go-“ Eve replied quickly, setting a wet plate on the drying rack.

“You didn’t tell her why, did you, Eve?” Selim jabbed sternly, “She has a right to know what happened, it was an accident. You aren’t in any trouble.” He swore he didn’t understand how Eve could be such a child. Of course, they didn’t want to get scolded, but lying? What would that fix? Their mother would be broken up to find out she didn’t know her own child was hurt! Far more hurt than sparing her feelings to avoid a scolding. 

“Selim?” Solaris smiled, eyes meeting his with a look of discomfort. Of course! His guest! He couldn’t fight in front of a guest, Eve would die of embarrassment. This would have to wait, and it would, he wasn’t letting Eve get away with lying to their own mother. Eve seemed to pick up the cue themselves and shoved awkwardly at the sink. 

“I’m going to eat, then we are going to update mom on what’s going on.” It was an order, but a well-meaning one. Eve weakly nodded, their grip loose on a fork running under the water. 

Selim looked to his plate, pushing back his nausea. He didn’t feel as bad, but bad was being slammed into the wall by a truck. He took a few bits, pushing them down. It felt like eels crawling down his throat. 

After eating one egg he gave up. At least it was something, he ignored Solaris’s look of concern. He grabbed his plate and fork, taking it to the sink. Eve took it on autopilot, not even a word of their brother's lack of appetite. 

Selim grabbed two cups of water and filled them, he looked to Eve who was finished with his plate. “Let’s go talk to mother.” Another kind of demand.

Eve reached up to shut off the sink, slowly turning the metal handle. The water dropped away into sporadic drops, which only made his sibling shiver. 

Selim’s sibling followed his absently, up the stairs and to the golden knobbed door. Eve pushed open the door carefully, pushing into the stale air around them. 

The room was quiet, the siblings' mother was tucked in three layers of blankets. Her dark brown hair was strung out over her pillows and her eyes were open but distant. She was staring off on to the other side of the room, a blank expression on her pale face. Her cheeks were red, but her skin looked and felt as cold as ice, and her eyes were deeply sunken into her thin face. Her eyes followed her children, a small smile strained on her chapped lips. 

Selim’s expression softened, mimicking a smile. “Good morning.” He said gently.

Their mother tightened a look at Selim. "Selim…” she could barely make out, her words hoarse. 

“Don’t strain yourself, mother, I know I don’t look well. That is why we are going to Central.” He said, he still wasn’t sure how bad he looked. He felt terrible, and he knew he was paler than normal. Lack of sleep didn’t help much either. He walked over to her bedside table and handed her a cup of water.

She nodded to him, her frail white fingers shaking as she took the glass. She sipped it slowly. 

Eve was right behind Selim, watching their mother with an expression Selim couldn’t decipher. A mix of concern and- fear? What did they have to be afraid of? Maybe it was shame? He wasn’t sure, but he knew something was lurking in their eyes. Something that had been burrowing into them since he saw them last night. 

She finished her water and Selma set it down on the table. The soft light of morning reflecting in, revealing the dust particles that danced around the room. Their mother coughed bitterly, Eve perking up in concern. 

“Mother-“ Eve began, Selim set his hand on their shoulder. This only seemed to make them jumpier, eyes locking on Selim’s. There was nothing they could do but wait it out. 

Her coughing fit slowed, peddling to a stop. She opened her mouth to speak again. “What happened, my sweet child?” She asked in a far more coherent hoarse voice. 

Eve shuffled nervously, their arms across their chest, eyes darted to the wall. 

Selim sighed, looks like this was his job. “Yesterday out in the garden, Eve was upset the watering basin had broken. They kicked it in an attempt to fix it, and the faucet broke off. I was right in front of it and it hit me on the head.” Selim gestures to his new supposed scar.

“I see…” She half mouthed a look of understanding. “Is that why you lied to me, child?” She said, directed at Eve. 

Eve refuses eye contact. “I...I didn’t want you to be upset…” was all they could muster.

“They used their alkahestry to heal me, so any surface wound is gone. It was all a misunderstanding, the metal was weak. I’m sure if they knew they wouldn’t have kicked it.” Selim swooped in. “It could have been much worse if not for their quick thinking.” 

“Really?” Their mother rasped.

“No, no...I just...I got you hurt, I didn’t want you too di-get any worse.” Eve muttered defensively, still refusing eye contact, their head hanging low. 

“Don’t be so modest, you saved my life. I owe your alkahestry quite a lot.” Selim said it didn’t seem to make Eve feel any better. In fact, it almost seemed like they shuddered as he spoke.

“Oh, my darling…always making messes...come here.” Their mother softly requested. Her weak hand raising, and the other hand pushing back her blanket. She had a white sweat-stained nightgown. 

Eve faced her, their eyes glossy, and slowly stepped toward her. Once right next to the bedside their mother cradled her ashy white fingers under their face, pulling them closer to her eye level. “That must have been terrifying for you...but you did a wonderful thing… you should be proud… not sad…” Her smile was kind, it folded naturally to her lip. Eve began to tear up.”I know it’s hard… but it’s over now… you’re both okay…” her fingers fell, and she began to cough. 

Eve hopped back. “Mom!” They voiced concern. Their mother covered her mouth with her hand. 

The coughs consumed the room, the two siblings stood like statues. The yellow light hitting their mother’s sulked form, and the bed frame shaking. It continued that way for nearly a minute.

Once it subsided, Selim began to speak. “Trisha will be here to take care of you until we come back. She knows where your medicine is. We should only be in Central for a few days, I will call if anything changes.” 

Their mother nodded weakly. “I love you...please be safe...both of you…” 

“We will be, I’ll be sure of it!” Selim vowed. 

———————————————-

The ride to Central was a nightmare. Eve could only watch as the scenery changed, the lush greenery to distant fields. Soon they would be seeing the small towns and leaving the dirt roads. Soon they would be coming to a stop to the busy streets of the city. 

Soon Eve would either be arrested or forced to wait in a lobby as they found out just badly they would get it for attempting to kill their own brother. Eve didn’t want to be there, Eve didn’t want to be here. At least in jail, they wouldn’t be drowning. 

Suffocating in their own vile thoughts, replaying their mother's sickly sweet smile they didn’t deserve. All they ever needed to be appreciated was to save _him?_ Was that everything they had been fighting for? Was that all their Alkahestry training gave them? What good is praising the snake that coughed up the mouse? The mouse would have lived a happy life if it had never met the snake. Why praise it for denying its instinct?

That was instinct. It was instinct they hit Selim, instinct took control of them. Their mind went blank and they were raw. Is that what they are? Without the layers of human skin and silk gowns? A snake denying its instinct. 

The rolling fields only continued. Selim was talking with Solaris, Did they know? What Eve was? Did they hide enough in their own skin to trick them? Was their brother a snake in his own right too? All Hohenheims could be.

No, their brother was no snake, he never hides his bite. He never had to, his bite was justified. Eve felt like a fool, all they ever did was smile. Smile and look pretty, until the illusion broke under their fist and another cut kissed their knuckles.

It reminded Eve of when they were a young child, and they read of selkies. How they wore the skin of a seal to disappear into the water. If they were to kill as a seal would they be blamed as a woman? They were human women without their coat, yet they only begged for death. 

Eve understood them. They begged to be able to swim away in the rolling hills, far beyond the smell of death. The empty home, the bloody watering can, the leaking faucet next to them. The memories of her smile, her unjustified smile. Eve only ever saw it in a lie, a lie they would never be able to mend. 

If they all knew the truth, then Eve would be without their coat, but Eve’s coat was made of silk and lavish. What were they without it?

Eve lingered through foggy thoughts as the tide of buildings rolled in. Small townhouses and shops of brick and wood, people on the street only doubling. 

The last time they had been to Central was four months ago, to help their mother pick out new clothes. She never got to wear those clothes, not that it mattered now. Eve may never get to see her again. 

At least their last memory of their mother would be her smile. 

The car was coming to a stop, Eve could feel it. They turned to Selim, in his signature blue suit with a white button-up, he looked back at them. 

“I thought you fell asleep.” He said with a lazy smile. 

“No, I was just distracted,” Eve replied, Solaris turned the car into a large parking lot. 

“Mom is doing just fine. Trisha is a professional.” Selim reassured. 

Eve faked a smile, “I know, it’s just been a while since I left her…” their sentence drifted off. They had been the one taking care of her, not Selim. Selim could at least let them be upset. 

Solaris stopped the car. “We’re here.” She smiled and cracked open the door of her black car. 

Eve opened their door and Selim followed suit, both left the car. Eve stood in front of the large brownstone building, three stories tall, littered in windows. It wasn’t very impressive as far as military buildings went, but it was definitely a hospital. So they were going there first? Was it a trick? 

Solaris and Selim walked toward the doors with little issue. Was it a setup? Eve sighed. If it was they were no safer out here. They resigned themselves and followed the pair into the building. 

Solaris went up to the wooden counter, sweetly explaining the group’s situation. The woman listening behind the desk was a darker-skinned older lady, with black short hair. There were a few people filling out paperwork on the chairs beside Eve. Even more people behind the desk area, running in and out of doors in the hallways ahead of them. Eve couldn’t see them as much as they could hear them.

Selim was now next to Solaris, leaning against the desk with his fingers pressing against his forehead. Eve could see his scar, it was rounded, with a large deeper scratch shaped marking diagonally across it. Eve turned away, refocusing on the busy hallways ahead of them. 

In a matter of minutes, a nurse had called for Selim. He followed them to the back halls, where Eve lost sight of him. They sat down on an empty chair, Solaris sitting next to them.

“Something’s bothering you.” She stated. Eve tensed up.

“Yeah, my brother has a concussion.” They politely replied. 

“Can you tell me what happened?” Solaris asked. 

“He got hit with a pipe,” Eve replied matter of factly.

“Hm…” Solaris looked around. "He might be here awhile. The doctors will want him to spend the night to make sure he’s stable.” 

Even if that was the case, Eve could get a hotel. They didn’t mind waiting, they had no choice but- “Do you trust Trisha?” Eve asked.

Solaris smiled, it rung pins up Eve’s spine. Another stupid synthetic smile. “I do, she’s saved my life more times than I can count.” 

“Was she in Ishval?” Eve asked Solaris’s expression grew more serious.

“Yes, we both met in Ishval. She was only a nurse then. She works at the hospital now. She’s a doctor.” 

Oh, so she was a dog even then, but did she bite? She was quick to brush past it, that’s just like a military dog. Eve kept a calm look.”How did you two meet?” 

Solaris perked up and eyebrow. “That is not a story I’d like to tell here. We can go to my house if you would like?” 

Eve mentally groaned. They didn’t want an answer. They just wanted to yank her leash. It seemed that wasn’t working. “No. I want to stay here until I can see Selim.” Eve insisted. 

“I see, I understand completely.” Solaris gave them a knowing look. “It’s a shame your brother got hit with that can.” 

“That’s why I need to-“ Eve shot a look at her, and the dog simply smiled. 

Eve got up from their chair. ”I’m going to get some air.” They stated. If Eve was getting arrested then it was not happening here. Not in a fucking lobby! Of course, they were going to get arrested! Did they really believe for a second they were getting away with it? Then their mother, of course, it was an act, their mother would need a real reason to smile as she did. Getting rid of dead weight seemed reason enough. Eve was an absolute fool, it should have been obvious the minute they sent a whore to the door instead of a real threat. A false sense of security and they fell for it.

Eve quickly walked to the side of the building, Solaris hadn’t stopped them. They sat down, nothing left to do now but wait. 

A few minutes went by and the only thing that caught them was really cool breeze of the morning air. Every car that parked went straight into the hospital and all the personnel were still in the building. So they had to be outside or waiting, but for what!? 

Eve looked around once more, the cars in the parking lot remained unmoving. Were they in th-

“No one’s coming after you.” A smooth voice spoke from behind them, _directly behind them_. It was Solaris, how did she-

“I didn’t tell anyone what happened. I simply saw the watering can was dented.” She sat down, and Eve crawled back frantically. 

“Relax, I just want to know what happened.” She smiled. Eve crawled back a bit more. Solaris didn’t seem to follow. They threw their head back, no one behind them, then back to the whore dog. 

”I-I have nothing to tell you!” Eve spat.

+

“You don’t trust me, I understand,” Solaris responded, without even a change in expression. "I understand the distaste for the military, you think very little of me, don’t you? I don’t mind.” 

Eve blinked a bit. It didn’t matter if the whore minded. She was swimming in money, of course, she didn’t care what some bratty kid thought of her. “Why do you care?” Eve growled. They had no interest in mind games. ”If you’re going to arrest me then just do it.” They demanded.

Solaris sighed, almost apathetic, almost genuine. Eve was smarter than that. She sat down, her heels resting on her legs. “No one is coming to arrest you, but if you keep acting that way they might.” 

“Is that a threat?” Eve shot back. 

“No.” She said simply. “I have no reason to threaten a scared child.” Scared child? How dare she condescends to them like that!

“This scared child nearly killed someone, he’s only alive because I spared him.” Eve smiled sinisterly, the words felt awful on their lips. It was the truth, which only made it sting even more. 

“Why did you spare him?” She asked the same gentle look like Eve’s tone meant nothing to her.

“For mother’s sake, she couldn’t bear to lose someone with her condition so poor.” Eve lied, the same cruel tone remained.

“What will you do once she is gone?” The whore asked.

Eve flinched. Their thoughts grumbled inside them. What would they do? It had not occurred to them. Who is to say mother would be gone? _If_ she is gone! There was no guarantee she would be going anywhere! If no doctor in Central could help her then Eve would drag one out themselves!

“Selim tells me you spend every night with her.” The whore continued, kneeling on the cement. She hadn’t moved any closer to Eve, but she leaned toward them. Her composure only made Eve’s skin crawl. 

“Well someone has to! Even if that brat did die, it’s not like he gives two shits for Mother anyways. Besides, it doesn’t matter now. Either I go to jail or I don’t, and if I don’t-“ They sharpened their cruel smile, like the whore, would stop them. She was only a glorified secretary, even if she was an alchemist. Eve was positive they could transmute her into next week. "-Then I’ll have to make sure it stays that way.” They chuckled darkly, fingers to their face gingerly.

“Is that so?” The whore replied, her eyes still locked to them. They were unmoving, full of raw energy Eve hadn’t seen before. She unbuttoned her jacket. Eve stared wide at her, is she going to seduce them? That’s fucking disgusting! Is she had desperate!? 

She had a black low hanging shirt, with an array on her chest. It was black with a pentagram shape, and points coming out of the top. Eve relaxed, the whore didn’t even draw her own circle. Eve chuckled. "Oh is drawing one yourself too much of a p-"

The woman grinned and the array lit up. Hundreds of tiny spikes shot from the cement floor. Eve threw themselves flat against the wall. Two large cement spikes crawled up to their neck, their hair pressed as hard as they could against the wall behind them. Their heart was going a mile a minute and their breath struggled to keep up. 

The whore-no, the _devil woman_ \- simply smiled. "Never underestimate your enemy, unless you want to die.” The spikes receded away from Eve’s throat. Eve felt sweat drip from their face. 

“B-bitch.” Was all they could make out, as their eyes watched the woman’s every move. 

“You’re a good person, Eve. You were scared. You made a mistake. You have two choices now. I trust you know what they are.” Her words were poison to Eve’s ears. 

They wanted to move, to run at her, but their body rejected them. They were shaking if they were standing before they weren’t any more... The last time they fell- _the last time? This was just like after they hit him._

They loathed it. They felt their face wettened once more. “J-just kill me then, coward bitch.” The words were brittle and broke on impact. 

“Do you really wish to die? Like you wished for Selim to die?” The woman asked. The question was a stab in the chest.

“Rich talk for a dog! Dogs do as their told, right? I’m a threat, so k-kill me.” The power was nonexistent, and even the words were wavering. 

“I’m not going to kill you. There is a part of you that hurt Selim. There is a part of you who saved him. I don’t understand your life or your family, but I understand pain. I understand guilt.” Her expression was soft, yet cold and distant. “Humans need fear to survive, they need anger. I have seen the look in your eyes- dread. You can choose to carry that dread, move on, carry yourself to a better future. Or you could give in to the fear, the anger, the denial. Bury yourself so deep no one can save you.” She pulled all the spikes back into the ground. Eve stood wide-eyed like a statue.

“It’s okay to be afraid, to bottle things up because you’re only a child. You have a whole future ahead of you.” The woman rose up calmly. Like she had any right to be calm after that! After threatening a child with death! 

After Eve threatened to kill her. She had no intention of killing them. If she did they would already be dead. Nothing was ever stopping her. 

“Think it over. I know you despise me. You have every right to. I can’t fix what I’ve done. You can. You saved him. You have a future far beyond this moment. How you move forward is up to you.” The devil woman said and walked out of the corner.

———————————

Selim has to spend the night at the hospital just to make sure he was fine. He was going to be there for two more days. 

He was going to be fully monitored so Eve didn’t even need to be there. The devil woman had been respectful enough to get another dog to drive them home. They didn’t remember his name or care. 

The whole ride was spent watching the stone buildings turn to wood, becoming more sporadic. Soon the city fizzled away in exchange for an open sky and fields. The man up front kept the window open since he was smoking the whole time. The chill bit at Eve’s arms.

It was all a blur after that, leaving the car and dismissing him. Eve was polite, but of course, he didn’t deserve it. Speaking with Trisha about their mother, she was just fine. 

Trisha’s expressions only annoyed Eve. Trisha, like all other doctors, had no hope for her recovery. Of course, she didn’t. It was too much work. Those hacks don’t know what Eve knows. Trisha left shortly after.

Eve told their mother of Selim’s condition. She was hardly coherent enough to reply. She nodded along weakly with a small smile. Eve brought her more tea. 

By the time nightfall beckoned, they found themselves out by the shed. The cool night air danced off their white shirt and black slacks. Eve was tired of being told how to feel! By the devil woman, by Trisha, by Selim, but what did they know about how to feel? When had they ever gotten it right? They were no better than Eve! _How did anyone know how to feel?_

To Eve it felt like an endless cycle of violence. They got hurt, they got mad, they hurt someone else, it hurt them. It seemed hopeless to escape, no one can live a life without getting hurt. Except for Selim, who never whined like Eve. He had a future planned before Eve was born. He never had to get hurt. Eve had no future. They were a Hohenheim. That was their future, an ideal, an expectation they only struck down with every move they made. Every fit they threw, burying a good name into the dirt. Their mother had good reason to despise them. Eve had good reason to despise themselves. Yet, nothing has changed. 

The cycle only adapted- hate it, break it, fix it, grow to hate it once more. Eve wanted to be angry so badly to start the cycle again. It was pointless, but wouldn’t they feel better? All the cycle gave them was a moment of peace. It turned their hatred and fear into power, a power that had to be released on something, or someone. As they looked to the stars, which were now in clear view in the sky, a bitter thought grilled them.

Hitting things only hospitalized their only brother. Their mother had lost the ability to stand weeks ago, she may be incoherent by the time he comes back. It would be all Eve’s fault. Their family would die with them to blame.

They let their body slump to the ground. They were too tired to fight. Acceptance was bitter medicine. Their false sense of peace was ripped clean from their fingers and died with their many delusions regarding their bitter family.

Only one option remained, Alkahestry.

They weren’t sure what it meant to them now. It saved Selim. It could do far more. It was a tool, but it felt good. It felt like a choice, the _right_ choice. It was a new sensation that held wonders even the best healers and alchemists in Ametris knew nothing of. 

Eve closed their eyes, listening to the wind blow across the trees. They focused on the feeling, the want, taking deep breaths. The meditative state was key is alkahestry, intent, and focus. Reading the world around you, until you were both isolated from it and one with it, disappearing in plain sight. 

They felt the green around their fingertips, coiling like a snake. The world around them was blurred with colors, blues, reds, purples, pinks, and greens curled around the flowers around them. Nothing like this existed in Ametris, of all the books they read, none could describe it. None of those dogs or researchers could hope to fathom the power under their fingertips.

They made their choice. They saved one life, what’s one more?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man talk about embarrassing for Eve huh? Good thing they got themselves out of that one! Anyway, stay tuned for more fun sibling banter. : )


	3. Awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's name is a pun because I like them.
> 
> Trigger Warning: Long-awaited death

Days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months. Every single day was spent studying, practicing, and planning. The holes in the wall of Eve’s room only multiplied from every little pin that impacted. Their aim was nearly impeccable and they had deciphered every journal their father had left from Xing. 

Their mother was still dying and Eve could see the hopelessness in her eyes. Every week Eve came in with a new idea, an array, a herbal mixture, anything to help her. They saw what little hope she had wither. Eve wasn’t trying hard enough, that had to be it! 

They threw another journal filled with their alkahestry notes at their bedroom wall. Might as well just burn it with the other ones. Every idea, everything they researched, it was a total fallacy! Even the smallest ounce of hope, when it seemed their mother was getting better, only to be worse the next day.

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair! Their mother had lost so much. Their family had lost so much, and fate spit in their face. 

Eve could do Alkahestry. They could throw pins in the shape of a perfect star in their sleep. They could heal a gash in a second, list the properties of every herb in their garden, list every clan of ancient Xing, focus themselves to see the pulse of their whole yard. All of this and their mother was still dying. 

Every doctor Selim brought was just another spit in the face. He couldn’t even care to deal with their mother's sickness himself. The doctors were useless. They came from all over Ametris yet couldn’t be bothered to help Dante. Even the one from Creta had given up on her and told the siblings to their faces it was hopeless. Selim must have believed them after that, or gotten tired of their bullshit like Eve because that was the last doctor ever sent.

That was the last time Eve saw Selim, too, not that it wasn’t nice to not see the judging look he gave every time he walked by. The judgment from seeing the holes in their walls, the journals scattered across their bedroom floor, the pins alongside them. At least Eve was trying. Selim couldn’t say the same for himself. 

Selim, who abandoned his family for the limelight of Central, for military whores and bastards to stroke his ego. He never bothered coming home, not unless it was to pester Eve for their mess. Eve was always too tired to bother yelling at him. It was a waste anyway. 

It was better without him mocking them, treating them as a child. 

“When was the last time you ate?” “Did you even sleep?” “Take a break from reading.” 

_Take a break from trying to save our only mother. I gave up weeks ago, look how happy I am!_

It sickened them. Eve could take care of themselves. They weren’t a fucking child, they didn’t need big brother on their shoulder, pretending now was the time to care! Like he ever gave two shits for their mother! He was just like those military bastards he idolized. 

Why care for something that isn’t benefiting you when he could be sucking up to a bunch of corrupt dogs and murderers? Eve clenched their fists. Selim was next to them in the same blue suit sans the coat. Eve wanted to strangle him, but they couldn’t. They were far too tired, even the anger that boiled inside of them couldn’t surface. What held Eve back from expressing their frustration could only be the memory that replayed in their head like a nightmare. The last memory they had of her before being trapped downstairs, that still left them nauseous and guilty.

Their mother was resting in bed, cold as ice, her hair slung across her pillow. The early morning light only highlighted her ashy white skin. Eve walked into the stale room and set down a cup of tea. Even with the memory fresh it still felt like a dream. Their mother's eyes wouldn’t open. Her fingers were purple and there was a smell, an unbearable stench that Eve couldn’t shake from their memory. Eve vomited, almost on impulse. They turned to their mother, to see the look of disgust, movement, _anything._

The stench was coming from her. 

Eve called Selim, but they wish they hadn’t. He was now sitting next to them at the kitchen table. Trisha was upstairs with their mother. She had called someone else, Eve didn’t know who. They weren't allowed upstairs, not even to go to their room. 

No one would tell them anything. 

Selim sat a cup of tea next to Eve. They didn’t touch it. Their throat felt icky, it was either from tears or their cold. Which had lasted a couple of weeks already, the stupid cold that was apparently so alarming they couldn’t even go upstairs to change. 

They weakly kicked their chair. Selim glanced over to them. Eve could see the pity in his dead amber eyes, as he rose from his chair. 

“Do you want anything to eat?” He asked. Eve glared daggers at him. Of course, now he was playing a caring big brother. 

“I’m not hungry, besides, I’ll just vomit it out again.” Eve half-joked. They could see from their sibling’s expression that he didn’t find it funny at all. 

He cracked open the cabinet full of bread and baking ingredients. “Why didn’t you tell me you were sick?” He questioned harshly. 

“Why are you pretending you care?” Eve bit back. As if they couldn’t handle a fucking cold. “Who did Trisha call?” Eve spit out.

Selim flinched before slouching down slowly. “Answer my question first.” He demanded, shooting a cold but vacant look to them. He was hiding something. 

“No.” Eve hissed, “If it was so important to c-“ they felt a huge cough overtake them, hacking into their elbow, spit clinging to their white baggy cotton nightgown. Great, now he just had more to nag them about. His eyes lit up as much as his deep eyes could- in concern as he rapidly approached them. 

They held up their open hand, shoving him back. Like hell, they needed his help. The dryness of their throat burned, and as the coughing settled they felt the thick taste of metal. 

———————————————————

Selim watched his sibling in deep concern. The hacking only confirmed the horrible feeling brewing in his chest. His sibling lowered their sleeve from their mouth, red flecks appeared- blood! There was blood on their sleeve!

“Stay here, I’m getting Trisha.” He demanded. Eve shot a look of anger at him. It held little impact. Their pale, skinny face and the shadows under eyes only served to make them look brittle. 

“Bullshit, you’re not!” Eve hoarsely demanded, then cleared their throat sharply, “Who did you call?” 

Selim sighed. He knew he would have to tell them but he couldn’t, not when they looked so weak, so broken already. “I’ll tell you later, stay here.” He demanded once more. He felt their grip on his before he could even turn. “Eve-“

“Tell me what the fuck is going on!” They slammed their other hand on the table, leaning over it to get closer to him. 

“Eve. Let go.” He couldn’t tell them. He needed to wait. He needed them to be safe. His expression darkened, an icy look in his eyes. “I’m only going to say this once.” 

He could see the fear in their eyes, but Eve’s grip was unwavering. “So am I. Who did you call, _Selim_?” There was a harsh focus on his name. 

Selim was quiet. He didn’t want to hurt them. He knew they understood, they found her like that. They had to know, but- the stress could kill them. Eve was completely unpredictable, the last few weeks had been complete torture for them. 

He recalled that every day he came home, Eve never came to the door. The smell of unwashed dishes faded as the days went by. The sink was always full of empty mugs, no plates, no utensils. He would always make food, but even calling never brought them down. 

Eve was up in their room, every day. Journals scattered around them, pins tossed askew on the floor and in the walls, crumpled-up notes of arrays and bitter thoughts. Their glossy eyes, overflowing with anger, sunken into their face. Their baggy clothes, the whiteness in their skin. The moment they made eye contact, all he caught was their raw fury. Speaking to them only made it worse, like pouring gas on a flame. It was too much for them. It was always too much for them. Eve couldn’t handle that much responsibility and it was only killing them inside. They never had to say it to him, he knew, he saw the hopelessness in his sibling's eyes.

They had to move on, but how? It was far too cruel, Eve was only a child. It wasn’t their job to fix these things, it was his. He had told them before it was too late. It was like speaking through a fog, the words never seemed to hit them. 

Selim looked at his sickly sibling a final time. They couldn’t run forever. He hadn’t, even if it killed him to admit it. Eve didn’t want the truth. He kept his icy look. “I called the police, they are sending someone to collect mother.” His expression softened and he felt his sibling’s grip weakened, “I’m sorry Eve.” 

His sibling didn’t move, but he could feel the anger in their eyes. It didn’t hurt, it wasn’t pointed at him. It was pointed at the world, at the truth in front of them. “Don’t lie.” Was all they said.

“I’m not lying-“ Selim began, this was the answer they wanted wasn’t it?

“Don’t say that shit. If you were sorry you wouldn’t have left!” Eve shouted, getting closer to his face. “Don’t fucking lie to me about how you feel when you didn’t do shit to help her!” 

Selim felt a stab to his chest, a burning wound that he wasn’t going to take sitting down. Him? Not do anything? How could his own sibling be so blind? Suddenly it hit him. His expression grew cold and his eyes tightened to a sharp gaze. His head tilted forward slightly, facing his sibling. 

“I didn’t do anything? Who brought the doctors from all over Central? Who hunted down each doctor, begged them to make house calls? Who did this day after day, while keeping up with my studies, just so Mother would have a chance! The doctor was Cretan, do you know how much work I had to do to get him into Central? Weeks of letters and for what? Just so we could hear the same things we have repeatedly heard! Mother cared about my studies because she wanted us to live, not for her, but for ourselves! Even she knew it was hopeless! You can’t chase a pipe dream forever! You need to grow-up-“ Before he could finish Eve used what little force they had left to slam their fist into his face. 

He flung himself back from the fist, twisting a bitter look at his delusional sibling. They had tears rolling down their face. “Grow-up? So what- I’m the one- the one being a child? I’m the one throwing a stupid fit, god forbid I try! God forbid I try and fix things my fucking self! What did you want me to do?! Give up like you! Oh, but Eve, I tried fancy doctors and it didn’t work! So, oh well, let’s just let her die, she only gave all of her time and life for our futures, but like who cares? I’m already successful! We don’t even need her anymore!” Eve mocked, tears were still streaming down their face. “Since when have you done anything? You left for the fancy military fucks while mom was on her deathbed! Just to peek in and condescend to me because I was actually fucking trying to fix things! You wanted to be a Hohenheim, congratulations! You did it, you abandoned your family for a pipe dream! Good fucking job, Mister Van Hohenheim! Dad would be so proud!”

Selim rose back up, this childish fit, this _tantrum_ , was nothing more than desperate. Of course, they would throw him under the bus, there was no one left to blame. He rubbed his cheek, his cold gaze drifted to the light of the garden outside. Mother would have loved this day, the way the morning light hit the flowers lighting up their vibrant colors. He looked back to his sibling, Eve was shaking, they were hardly standing, leaning against the table for support. The fire in their eyes made them look almost orange. 

He knew what his mother wanted of him and she didn’t want him down and broken. She didn’t want that for any of them, she wanted them to be happy. She wanted the future, she set them both up with all the tools to succeed. That was always her goal, yet Eve, Eve wouldn’t understand. They were too young, too in the moment, the future was always a joke to them. 

“Mother looked up to Dad, that’s all she wanted from all of us. She wanted us to go forward. This-“ He gestured upstairs, "This is forward! It hurts, it’s tragic, but time doesn’t burn on our whims! It doesn’t stop because we aren’t prepared for it! All she ever wanted from us is a good future! I have done everything to give her something to be proud of, a son to see Father in! To see what good she has done! Do you think I like it? The feeling of never seeing her face again, that she will never see me in uniform? That she will never get to see what her work had done?” 

Eve forced out a weak laugh. “Even on our mother's corpse, all you can think of is yourself! It must be so hard to not have anyone to gloat to anymore! What would you be without someone stroking your fucking ego! A future? That’s your excuse because you gave up on the-“ Eve broke into a coughing fit. 

Selim winced. An argument wasn’t going to help anyone. Not that it made a difference, it seemed Eve wasn’t listening to him either way. Their grip on him had been released long ago. He turned to the front and spotted Trisha. 

Trisha was watching from the balcony of the stairway, eerily silent until he approached. He waited until he got close enough, making his way up the stairs until he was next to her. Eve’s coughing fit had started to slow, but he could see the dark look it left in Trisha’s eyes. 

“They should be here in an hour.” He said, in a curious tone, as if waiting for the woman's confirmation. He could smell a horribly strange odor from down the hall, it made his body tremble. He hadn’t seen his mother. He didn’t want to. 

“You really don’t have a family, Selim?” She asked, a serious look on her face as she leaned forward on the banister. 

Selim sighed. “Just our father, but he has been traveling for some years and Mother cut ties with her biological family years ago.” His father was a brilliant man, but he was far too young to enjoy it. He knew deep down they would meet again, but no letters ever returned or were sent from him. Mother never moved, in case he sent a package or called. He never did.

“I see.” She was silent for a moment. “I think you and Eve should come with me.” 

“Why?” Selim asked, leaning forward in surprise.

“I think it’s better we leave soon.” Was all she said, quiet and matter of factly. 

“But what about mother?” Selim asked, Trisha’s expression was strangely distant. 

“They will be here soon, they have no need to question any of us. The medical reports will do. Eve needs serious medical attention, she could have an infection.” Trisha stated with heavy intent, her bag already slugged across her shoulders. 

“They aren’t going anywhere, I already tried-“ Selim began, Trisha shot him a look. One he could only decipher as ‘we are going whether they want to or not.’ 

Eve had stopped coughing by the time they got back down. They wouldn’t make eye contact with Selim and only glared at Trisha. 

Trisha was unfazed. “Your mother is going to be taken back to Central. The police will have this situation covered, you two can ride with me back to Central.” 

Eve didn’t move, their eyes were stained red from tears. Selim could see their eyes were full of rage, now pointed right at him, as if it was his fault she was trying to drag them away. It technically was, he glanced to Trisha, who nodded lightly to him. 

“Eve, I understand you're not happy with him, but it’s for the best you two come with me.” She said, leaning a bit cover to his sibling, her tone was practical but kind. 

“I’m not going anywhere!” They hissed, their fists were clenched once more. 

Trisha glanced to Selim. “Go upstairs and start packing, you both are staying with me for the next couple of days.” He nodded, still a bit shaken up by the smell. His room was right across from his mother's room, the thought of being so close only hurt. Yet if she sent Eve- No, he had to do it. He was the only one she could trust. 

Eve spiked up, turning now to Trisha. “Why don’t I get a say in this! Why is he allowed upstairs? That’s bullshit!” 

“Because he will come back down. You won’t,” Trisha said softly, yet matter of factly. She shot Selim an impatient look, he nodded and made haste to the upstairs. 

——————————————————

Eve threw their body forward to follow him, only to feel a grip on their right arm. It was the hospice bitch, the one trying to drag them out of their own house! To make them abandon their own mother. They threw their face in her direction, to scream at her or fling a fist in her face, but they couldn’t. Her eyes were soft, gentle, full of pity, but something blazed inside them, something that sent a chill through Eve’s very core. 

“Eve, I’m sorry.” Her voice was clear, it was full of remorse. Eve hated how familiar it felt.

“What? Did you kill her? Then you don’t have shit to be sorry for!” Eve snapped and yanked their hand but her grip was unwavering. 

“If I let go you will go running to her. I can’t let you do that.” She said sternly, Eve only chuckled in response. 

“Maybe I just don’t want that brat in my room?” They mused harshly.

Trisha stood her ground. “I don’t believe that.”

“Who cares what you believe? It’s not like you know shit about us anyway! You’re just a bitchy nurse!” Eve huffed, clear irritation in their voice. 

“Why is Selim being in your room such a problem?” She asked.

Eve felt a sharp jolt of emotion. Why? _Why?_ Because it was Eve’s space! That’s why! It was all they had left to call their own! It had the journal and their pins and all of their research. Selim couldn’t do much with it now, but it was still theirs! It was all theirs. “Because it’s my room. My stuff, I want to pack my own stuff!” 

“He’s your brother, he should know what to bring.” 

“Like hell he knows! He’s barely even here, he doesn’t even know what clothes to bring!” 

“We can buy you new clothes in Central then,” Trisha said stoically.

Eve yanked once more. The woman’s grip was tight but it didn’t seem to hurt. It was just tight enough so Eve couldn’t escape, which was stupid! One good hit in her stupid face and Eve was home free. 

“Eve, look at me.” The woman said sharply. “I know you're ups-”

“What the fuck do you know? Yeah! I’m upset! I can’t even go in my own fucking room-” 

“Eve. This isn’t about the room. This isn’t about Selim or your clothes.” The woman interrupted, her tone was heavy and serious. “Seeing her like this isn’t going to help you, it won’t change anything.” Her grip grew softer, not enough for Eve to escape though. “You’re not being rational right now-”

“What do you know about ra-” They tried to scream, only to double over in a coughing fit. It always seemed to pick the best times, didn’t it? They held their free hand to their chest. Trisha grabbed their shoulder to support them. 

“Please, Eve, you need medical attention. We can’t stay here.” The woman seemed to plead, softly and kindly. Eve only wanted to scream at her more, but the serrated dryness in their chest made it impossible. They looked up to the older woman’s figure, her hands around their waist. They were in too much pain to pull away, but no way in hell they gonna give up! They had the right to see her! They had to do something! Try one more time, they could fix it! They still had-

No, Trisha didn’t know anything! None of those hacks did, they gave up! They had no idea what Eve was capable of if they had just one more shot. Just one more try they could do it, they could prove them all-Their vision was blurring. 

They felt her arms wrap their back, lifting them to lay their head on her shoulders. Their coughing slowed to a whimper. 

“I’m sorry Eve.” The woman repeated, but Eve didn’t hear her. They just wanted the whole world to shut up, they wanted to try again. They were able to fix things, they could-Selim would have known. If he cared, he would have already fixed it. He never had to care! It wasn’t his future, it was theirs, their future which whimpered away with their tears. Whatever was upstairs, it wasn’t their mother.

The woman rubbed Eve’s head softly. Maybe if they closed their eyes they could pretend it was their mother, but that was a joke. Even with their eyes shut, they knew it could never be her, never again. Her scolding, her yanking at their hair early mornings, her smile when Selim came home. Her smile as Eve came to her every morning, that faded day by day, she knew, didn’t she? She knew it was hopeless, Selim, the doctors- maybe Eve was just a fool. A bratty child that thought a stupid temper tantrum could make everything better, but nothing was better, nothing was ever better. 

_________________________________________________________

When Selim returned it didn’t matter what he brought, he saw his sibling in Trisha’s arms. He could hear their tears, and Trisha took a small look to the child in her arms. They seemed so small then, he almost didn’t recognize them.

He had a large leather backpack slugged over his shoulders, his nose was still trying to expel the horrible odor from upstairs. He looked up to the steps, a final farewell. He could see the garden past the sitting room, the light only shown to make it more stunning. She would be saddened to see it abandoned, but nothing could be done. They were only children, with a father lost to the vast world. 

It was the end of a chapter, a chapter Selim knew couldn’t last forever. That didn’t stop the sinking of his chest, the cold feeling of the newfound emptiness he felt. She wouldn’t want this for him, for either of them. She gave everything in her life for their future, of course, Eve didn’t understand. The future was so far away from them. 

They would be okay if their notes were any indication, they had a future in Central. “I’ll take good care of them, I promise,” Selim promised, eyes locked to the stairwell, his hand to his chest. 

He turned to Trisha, his expression empty. “I’m ready.” 

She simply nodded.

Very few words were exchanged on their way to Central. Eve had fallen asleep early on. Selim watched the scenery go by, however, it wouldn’t be the last time. They would have to get the rest of their stuff, but he knew Trisha. She wouldn’t let two kids live alone is that big house, not so far away from civilization. 

Eve would like Central, not immediately, not with everything that had happened. They would grow to like it as Selim had over many years. The bustling streets, the markets, the alchemists, the massive library, the buildings that stood for hundreds of years before the siblings were born. The wealth of history and information, with all the freedoms they could ask for. Once they were ready for it. Until then they had Trisha. Trisha could do what Selim couldn’t. Selim had work to do. 

__________________________________________________________________

Eve hated Central: it was too noisy, there were people everywhere, and they swore there was a military dog at every street corner. It was full of old ass buildings with some fancy history Eve couldn’t care to learn about. The leaves were falling from the trees and Eve was itching to get back to the garden. Fall was just starting and their mother's garden would die in the cold.

It was two weeks since their mothers passing and a day before the funeral and the third time Eve had an opportunity to leave Trisha's small townhouse. The two-floor house near the center of central had become their home since their mothers passing. The last few days felt like they were months, staring out the window, coming to eat every time they felt dizzy. At the beginning they were bedridden due to sickness, the next was due to choice. 

Eve felt like whatever energy they could have was zapped out of them, and focusing on the city’s pulse only made them feel worse. It felt cluttered and nauseating, which made sense. It was a city full of hundreds of obnoxious people, everyone, with their own petty ass problems drowning the city in negativity. 

That was during the day, the nightmares had only happened twice. They were induced by fever, at least that’s what Trisha said, and Trisha would see Eve staring at the wall muttering something. The woman couldn’t make out what it was, but Eve could piece it together. The first week was the longest blur they had ever experienced, the medicine made them loopy and numb. 

The first time they left the townhouse was two days ago, apparently, they recovered fast. Trisha was a doctor, at least she could heal someone right. Still, they had a lingering cough, nothing contiguous, just tedious. 

Currently, they were looking for something to wear for the funeral. Trisha promised to pay for it and Selim was too much of a prick to find anything that worked. Apparently, Eve didn’t own any black formalwear, but it also made sense. None of her mother's boy-toys would buy her daughter a black dress. 

Trisha was holding Eve’s hand. She didn’t want them on the bustling streets. Which made sense to them, Eve was a stupid child, after all, it’s not like they could walk on their own. The cars honked loudly around the crosswalks, black, gray and white cars full of annoyed people shouting at traffic. The pedestrians traveled in packs, so maybe she was worried Eve would be swept up in the crowd? Eve doubted it.

They looked around to the shops, most were brick. Eve could see all the people in them. It was a Saturday, but it was the only day Trisha had off, or really anyone had off by how busy the streets were. Eve looked over Trisha, she had her hair in a loose ponytail in the back of her head, a brown fur coat, a simple brown dress, and black boots with dark pink laces. 

Trisha seemed to hide a bit of pink in every one of the outfits Eve saw her in. All but her doctor’s uniform, which was a pristine white. Eve couldn’t help but find it stupid, but they guessed it was a thing for people of Central. Fashion was diverse in the city, yet everyone dressed the same. It was all about the little things hidden in plain sight.

Trisha stopped in front of a shop, it was a bakery. Eve glanced up at her. “Why did we stop?” Eve asked, a bit irritated. 

“I was thinking, there is a dress shop to the left of here and a suit shop a block up,” Trisha stated, almost like a question.

“So?” Eve asked, “Selim already has a suit.” What? Did she think he needed a fancy tie of something? Why did it matter? Eve doubted he even was gonna show up. 

“Yes, I suppose you’re right.” Trisha smiled, she looked over Eve briefly, before turning left. 

Eve was confused by this, why would Selim-Wait. They looked down at their own outfit, they were wearing brown trousers and a white button-up with a deep green jacket over it. Was she mocking them? So what! They were too tired to put on a stupid dress! Who cares? 

“I’m not a boy.” Eve spit. 

Trisha looked back at them, why did she look surprised? They didn’t look like a boy-at least they didn’t try to. It wasn’t their fault they had masculine features, their name was Eve for fuck's sake. 

“I wasn’t implying that.” Trisha said sweetly, “it just seemed you preferred pants, but a dress looks lovely on you as well.” 

Eve weakly glared at her, before dismissing her to watch the shopfronts. Eve always wore dresses, like hell, they would spit on their mother's grave by wearing pants to her funeral. Trisha should have know that-Trisha only saw Eve in a dress twice. That was Selim’s fault for not bringing the right dresses though, Eve wasn’t going to wear an evening dress while shopping.

Eve pushed that single annoying lock of hair from their face, it came right back. The rest of their hair stayed loose behind them. They imagined their mother's stress, her aggressively trying to pin it back. They felt Trisha’s hand on their shoulders, glancing up they could see her soft smile. 

As much as they hated to admit it, Trisha wasn’t the worst.

_______________________________________

The funeral took place in a large building Selim had booked, it took him two weeks but Solaris had been a big help. The place was normally reserved for military funerals, but Dante knew so many people in the military it only seemed fitting for her. Even if her intentions weren’t always the greatest, for every man she swayed over there was another simply happy to socialize. At this moment it didn’t matter who knew Dante or why, the large building was full of people in black. No one wore a uniform as Dante wasn’t military, but that didn’t mean Selim couldn’t tell who was and wasn’t.

It was the sorrowful but empty expressions that said it all, they had experienced life far more than he could imagine. The way they stood firm in their seats, staring up as the preacher spoke like he was their drill sergeant. Selim was in the front row, in a black suit with a white undershirt and black tie. Eve was alongside him in a long black dress, their hair in a tight blonde bun wrapped in black ribbons. Eve also has a small bouquet of fresh lilies, chrysanthemums, red aster, and their mother’s favorite flower, yellow roses. The bouquet was wrapped in a golden tie, Selim recognized it from one of Eve’s old dresses. The one their mother handed down to them when they were nine, only four years ago. 

Selim looked at the casket, brown with golden hinges and lining. Thinking about what was inside of it was a different story. It was only four years ago Eve had ruined that dress, they scaled a tree and tore it to shreds. Mother told Selim when he came home, she grounded Eve for months. Four years later, his raggedy sibling was next to him in a black dress, staring at the casket of a corpse wrapped in silk. 

It didn’t seem fair to him. It wasn’t fair to either of them. His face was dry. The reaper was on his mother's shoulders too long for him to shed a tear. He felt nothing, nothing but a numbness as he stared at the fate long expected. Eve didn’t take it well, Eve was only a child. They should cry, free themselves, yet as he looked to them, the tears rolled down with eyes full of anger. 

He sighed and softly set his hand on top of his tense sibling’s shoulder. They simply shot a glare at him. He wasn’t sure why Eve was so upset. They always got this way when things were tense, but they hadn’t been happy with him since the funeral started. Well, more like since last night, when he told them of the plans for the funeral procession. He assumed it was the military funeral place, the white walls, the brown pews, and Amestrian flags were likely off-putting for Eve. He knew mother would have wanted it this way, as much as he hated to admit it. Money was already tight and their mother didn’t work. The military kept them afloat far more than Eve knew. 

The funeral couldn’t be any other place, not in such short notice. Not with such short funds. 

Selim cursed mentally. Once he was a state alchemist things were going to change. They would have the future they deserved, both of them. Eve would warm up to the military, see the good in them. 

Time rolled by. Eve didn’t make a speech. Selim certainly did, he spoke of his mother fondly, of everything she did for his sibling and his future, her abilities as a socialite and mother, her kindness and spirit, her garden. As mad as Eve was, he could see them soften up many times throughout the speech. Their wet eyes gazing up at him, reflective like dinner plates. 

After the speech, a few more people spoke. Lieutenant Colonel Solaris was one who knew Dante for three years and took care of Selim whenever she could. Another who knew his mother in a different way, sergeant Jullore, who spoke only fond things. He kept the relationship a secret. Commander Heleth and Mimi Rose, good friends of their mother from her younger days also spoke. They showed up to parties periodically, but it was clear to him their relationship with his late mother grew distant over the years. Finally, there was Major Wilks, a man their mother publicly dated, one of the few. They dated for over a year and Major Wilks taught Selim a lot over that time. He was the Blade Alchemist and served the military in making knives and throwing blades for wartime. He spoke of Dante’s intelligence and sass, but also her kindness. She left him due to her loneliness and desire for Hohenheim, the two shouted for hours over it. He decided to leave that out of his speech. 

Once the speeches were over, the group lined up to say final words. Eve set the bouquet down on their lifeless mother’s body. They muttered something Selim didn’t hear. Once he approached, he saw her unmoving, makeup didn’t make her look any better. It was simply a lie, but his mother would want to be buried this way. With full makeup and golden jewelry all over her, in a silk golden gown, even her hair was combed and hugged her pale face. For a moment he could pretend she was only sleeping. He was happy this was the last he would see her, not pale leaning off her bedside and hacking blood on her pillow. 

It was a morbid thought, better dead than when she was alive. Yet she looked more alive now than she ever did back then. 

Selim wanted to speak to her, but he couldn’t. Not with so many people around, it wasn’t her, wherever she was. She was gone, passed on. To speak to her now-

He turned back from the corpse, he had already said his goodbyes two weeks ago. He had made a promise he was going to keep. 

Selim held his coat tight to him as their mother was lowered to the ground. The autumn leaves fell from the tree near the gravesite. Eve was next to him, Trisha behind them. It was silent and it almost felt like a dream. 

He thought he had been prepared for it, however, seeing it was a different story. He felt Trisha’s arm on his shoulder, he set his hand on it softly. He didn’t need her comfort, Eve needed it more than him. 

Solaris was across from them in the crowd, in a black coat, a long black dress, and heels. She had her long black hair loose over her shoulders. Kimblee was next to her in a black suit, the same ponytail, and a black hat. Ed was in the crowd too, Trisha’s son, he was near a few men Selim recognized as coworkers. He too was in a black suit, black glasses, and his hair in the same braid as always. 

There were a few others Selim recognized, obviously those who gave speeches, and a few other tutors and members of the military. He even saw the Fuhrer's assistant, with her black hair in a tight bun on the back of her head, she had a black dress and a small webbed hat. Was his mother so important for her to show up? Was Fuhrer Armstrong here as well? What if she was?

He straightened his suit, did he look good enough? Was he going to embarrass himself? He couldn’t, not on his mother's real actual grave! He felt a sharp pain in his foot, then heard Trisha mutter something. 

“Eve, please.” She scolded gently in a whisper.

So Eve kicked him in the foot, of course, they did. He sighed, letting himself relax. “No, it’s fine.” He whispered back. 

Eve didn’t look any calmer. 

Soon after that their mother was in the ground and buried. The rest of the procession went to Trisha’s small townhouse for the wake. 

Another thing Eve scolded him about, but he couldn’t expect a massive group of people to drive thirty minutes to their home. Nor did he want to set up a massive wake just to clean it and leave the house for who knows how long. They couldn’t stay there, even at its cheapest they were two children. 

Selim would be too far from Central, and once Eve set foot in that house they would never want to leave again. It was worth being yelled at until their throat was dry. Eve needed this. 

Her house was simple, two floors with the bedrooms upstairs. A small kitchen with brown wooden cabinets, and a small dining room with a six chair table. No gold to be seen, just plain wood and a few paintings on the wall. The fanciest thing she had was the pink couch with a sewn-in flower pattern and a very modern wooden radio. The bookshelf was next to it, full of photo albums and medical books. The house was mostly empty furniture wise, Trisha owned two homes, the other one was a family home long paid off. It had most of her furniture.

The house was full of people, standing with drinks, sitting on scattered stools and chairs, all having melancholic conversations with one another. Selim jumped from conversation to conversation, and condolences left and right. It was surreal. It brought back memories of the garden and dinner parties of many months ago and back, yet left a tired feeling in his chest. He liked the surreality, it kept him grounded. 

With all the stress of the last few months, studying day and night, constant travel, letter after letter about his studies and taking the exam. It was all worth it, he saw in his mother’s eyes, he was so close. Even now, in the strange atmosphere of drowning sorrow, he could see her smile. He would make it for her. 

He left his conversation, drifting off to rest on the couch. He was thirsty and all this talking wasn’t helping. 

“Selim?” A woman spoke up. 

Selim glanced up, and his eyes widened. It was the Fuhrer's assistant, her deep nearly black eyes watching him stoically. He looked over his suit, okay he still looked presentable! That’s good, he just had too- “Y-yes?” He said, clearing his throat after, he is not stuttering in front of the Fuhrer's assistant! “I mean, yes?” 

“My condolences, your mother was an incredible woman.” The woman responded, her voice monotone. It made sense, she had experienced a lot, she had to be hardened to be the Fuhrer's assistant. A woman like that- she was truly something.

“Thank you,“ Selim began, “Colonel Riza Hawkeye.” He recalled. The assistant didn’t say her name often, in fact very little was known of her. It took him a long time to dig up her name, but Selim wouldn’t be caught dead not knowing someone’s name. It was entirely unprofessional, especially when it was this important. 

“Not many people know my name,” Riza responded, her dark eyes reflecting a bit of window light. “I’m impressed.” She didn’t look it, Riza was never very expressive. Not from what Selim saw of her, which was mostly her next to the Fuhrer during speeches or their walks through Central.

“You are too influential of a person not to know.” Selim smiled softly. 

The woman kept her stoic expression. “I suppose that’s true. The Fuhrer asked me to tell you that if you wish to postpone your entrance exam, she is fully willing to accommodate.” 

Straight down or business then. Selim shook his head. “This is what my mother wanted for me, postponing it would make little difference. I’m ready. I do very much appreciate the Fuhrer’s concerns if she wishes to postpone I will.” He chose his words carefully if any of this was to be repeated back to the Fuhrer he wanted to be respectful.

The woman nodded lifelessly. “Understood, it is your choice. She simply demanded I ask you.” With that, the woman turned away and walked off. She made no conversation with anyone passing, nor did anyone seem to want to engage her. 

She was a strange woman, Selim noted.

He sat there a moment, a few other people came to wish condolences. He was in a short conversation with his tutor Rosalind when he heard it. 

A large smack from near the kitchen, both him and the tutor, as did half the room, shot their gaze to the sound. It was Eve, they had just slammed Major Wilks in the face. The man stood there dumbfounded, he could see the fear in his sibling's eyes, fear, and shame. He got up from his seat, whispers spread through the room like webs. Webs he found himself stuck in, the Fuhrer's assistant was still here, and he had to clear the air. But how? What had even happened? 

He began to approach his dumbstruck sibling, politely moving through the crowd now gathering. Most people were by Major Wilks, barraging him with questions of what happened. A few were staring at his sibling, and Trisha and her son were now out of the kitchen. He could see Solaris in the crowd, she shot him a light smile. She was closer than he was, maybe she could find a way to get the tension off his younger sibling. 

Trisha tried to set a hand on the now extremely tense Eve, who simply threw it back at her. They pushed through the crowd and bolted up the stairs. No one followed, it was as if time stood still. No one spoke until the crowd erupted into whispers. He glanced at the stairs, the crowd was too big and he needed to calm the situation. He approached the group near Wilks. “Now I understand that may have looked unpleasant, but things have been really hard for my sibling-“ 

“I can only imagine, I can’t believe Major Wilks was saying those things!” A woman, a secretary named Avie from the central library, replied.

“At her own mother’s funeral for Pete’s sake! That poor child!” A man, David Redmond, an old flame of his mother’s and automail store owner, commented in concern.

“Major Wilks, do you have anything to say?” Solaris looked to the major now rubbing his face. 

“She was being irrational!” The man defended. 

“It is her mother’s funeral and if I recall correctly, she had every right to dislike you. You and Dante screamed in front of the poor child for months and you scold her for mourning. Do you have no shame, Major?” Solaris said, with a tone of both authority and cruel confidence.

The group looked to the Major in disgust, the man shrunk back. “You have no proof of those claims.” The man scuffed. 

“Is that so? Selim, what do you think of Major Wilks?” The woman addressed the boy. 

Selim hid his confidence and instantly put on a more upset compromising look. “He did shout at Mother quite a bit and Mother shouted back but- Eve is just a child, Major, they don't deserve your rage.” He gave an almost pleading look, the Major looking down in shame. “I understand you're upset, but the Major I know is better than this. We are all mourning, nothing is gained from fighting over the dead. Much less on someone as fragile as their daughter.” 

The man bit back a retort, but it was clear he had lost. Solaris may not look so perfect herself for accusing him, but she seemed satisfied. Selim never said they didn’t fight and Mother had no reason to tell her friend she was shouting back. Plus his reputation would be intact, far more than it would be letting the major get away with it.

“If you need me I must comfort my sibling, please excuse me,” Selim told the crowd, they moved out of the way creating a path to the stairs. 

—————————————————————————————-

Eve wanted to die, to disappear. They had never been so disgusted in themselves, they assaulted a military officer. They assaulted an officer for asking about their dead mom at her own funeral! Just because their childish feelings couldn’t get over some dumb fights from who gives a shit ago! They made a fucking embarrassment of themselves. They hid their face in their black dress, this whole day was a disaster. They just wanted it to end. 

They heard a knocking on the door, oh great! Selim there to tell them to get over it. How wonderful, or maybe it was spike-bitch to threaten them for assaulting an officer. Maybe murder man, or Wilks to bite their head off for embarrassing him. Either way, it wasn’t like they could run, they trapped themselves. 

The knock came again. Eve sighed, time to face the music. “Who is it?” 

“It’s Ed!” The voice rang, it was familiar to Eve. They squinted a bit, Ed? Did they know an Ed? He sounded too young to be any Ed they knew of the top of their head. 

The voice seemed to take note of the silence. “Edward Elric? We met at the party a few months back, remember? I just- I wanted to see if you were doing okay.” 

Major Elric? Huh? Eve didn’t see him as an Ed, but he definitely fumbled like Elric. 

They peeked under the wooden door of the bedroom, just one pair of shoes. “Are you alone?” Eve asked. 

“Yes, sorry should I go or-“ The voice rang. 

“No, you’re fine,” Eve replied tiredly and opened the door a crack. It was really just him then. The man was in a black suit, with new and rounder glasses, he was wearing a nervous smile. Eve opened the door all the way, slowly letting the man in. They kept checking to make sure no one was in the hall. They didn’t see anyone. 

Once the average set man was in the room, they shut the door and locked it. Elric sat on the guest bed and glanced at a picture frame. Eve ignored it, they have spent the last two weeks in this room. They had just cleaned it for the funeral Wake, they could still imagine the bag on the floor, clothes all over the bed, and their journals all over the floor near the window. 

The journals were now on the shelves, and Eve could see Elric- or rather Ed- glance over to them curiously. 

“My alkahestry research, it’s really something.” Eve half lied, sure they knew a lot now, but if it was really something their mom would still be with them. 

Ed smiled. “I’m glad you're making good use of my journal, mind if I take a look?” 

“Go ahead.” Eve waved lazily, grabbing the picture frame with the poorly drawn field Ed was looking at prior. It was a big field with a square house that looked on par with a five-year-old. Apparently, Trisha’s son drew it, so of course, she framed it. Love is blind.

They heard Ed flip through pages quietly, before making their way over to sit next to him on the bed. He kept flipping through pages upon pages of their notes, and they couldn’t help but feel a bit prideful watching him. Sure it ended up being for nothing, but they did know quite a lot. Eve had done far more than Elric could even dream to learn from a Xingese teacher by themselves in a few months. 

“This is incredible.” He finally said, letting the book sit in his lap. 

“Oh, you really think so?” Eve mused. “It’s really nothing, that stuff is easy.” 

Elric gave them a look of mild annoyance. “Well, I’m sorry I wasn’t as naturally talented as you.” He said with joking anger.

“You’re forgiven.” Eve chuckled. His hair looked longer, in the same braid. “Nice job on the suit, by the way, you didn’t miss a single button.” 

Elric quirked an eyebrow at that. “Thanks, that really means a lot.” He replied sarcastically.

Eve simply chuckled in response. They liked Elric, he was still a puppy enough for them to mess with him. He hadn’t been blinded by his stupid ego like the rest of the dogs downstairs.

He continued to flip through the pages, Eve leaned over slightly to watch him. 

“I hadn’t thought of combining herbs with alkahestry, it’s pretty clever,” Elric said, and Eve tried to hide their pride. They did a very poor job, but they didn’t care. 

“It makes total sense, plants carry chemicals that alter the body's own chemicals. It’s genius, bringing everything down to its equal chemical structure.” He continued, “Have you ever considered becoming a nurse? Or an herbalist? Knowledge like this could be incredibly useful in medicine making, or the wound healing process.”

Despite the clear compliment, Eve couldn’t help but wince. It opened the doors to questions Eve didn't want to think about, questions without answers. Eve wanted to be an alkahestrist, but that wasn’t a profession on its own in Ametris. They couldn’t get paid to study unless they- yeah they weren’t selling their soul to the dogs anytime soon.

“Sorry, did I make you uncomfortable-“ Elric began. 

Eve quickly held a hand up and waved it lazily. “It’s fine, I just- I just haven’t really thought about it. Selim’s got his whole future planned and I- it’s weird to think about you know?” Eve admitted. 

They had no idea what they wanted, and at worst Elric could give them poor advice they would just ignore. Still, it felt kind of nice to let loose, both of them were lost in their own ways. Elric was just a puppy and Eve wasn’t even that. They weren’t sure what they were. A lost brat? A hopeless dreamer? The family parasite? Those things were lost to them now. Can’t be a parasite with no family to leech off of, but Selim wasn’t the worst host. At least he would be successful in life, which was more than Eve could say for themselves.

Elric seemed to take note of their lack of response and smiled weakly. “You don’t need to know now, especially not now. A lot of shi-stuff has happened you know, you can take all the time you need. I didn't even consider working for the state until I was eighteen.” 

“Why?” Eve quickly mused, they wouldn’t be caught dead in the military. Unless Elric was desperate? Or after some pipe dream like everyone else.

“My mother was a doctor in Ishval, she told me all the horrors of the war. What state alchemists had to do. I was afraid. I wanted to use alchemy to help people, not hurt them. My teacher taught me everything in this world is connected, but also that for something to live something has to die. Equivalent exchange. I didn’t understand, but the more my mother told me, the more it seemed peace wasn’t so simple.” He said. Eve quirked an eyebrow at him curiously. 

“This is going somewhere, I promise.” He said awkwardly and pushed up his glasses. 

Elric refocused himself and continued, “For every soldier was an opposing one, for every bullet another comes after. Humans are complicated, we exist because of cruelty, but cruelty exists because of humanity. If you killed everyone who participated in war you would be a criminal. If you invented a bomb and it was thrown and killed hundreds, you would be an inventor. An alchemist is both a hero and a monster, they kill for themselves and their families, so the monster on the other side won’t kill them. I decided I wanted to help because my alchemy would do the world well. It would, of course, do the world bad, but it was my choice. When the time comes I’ll protect what matters because I have to, if I don’t someone else will die for me. I don’t want that out of my life.” 

“So you want to be a killer?” Eve spat out, they didn’t need to hear pseudo-intellectual hogwash. They were just starting to think Elric was different too. 

His expression softened, and he looked back to them almost weakly. “No one wants to be a killer, they end up one. Mom used to tell me she would save anyone, even those who had no chance. One day, she saved a young woman who simply had a broken arm. The woman was given treatment and a cast and afterward, she wished to thank the doctor. She killed him and stole a rifle from another officer. She killed fifteen people, ten of them were civilians, her own people. Mom said she called them betrayers, that they deserved to die because they defied Ishvala by accepting help from alchemists. Of all the people who came in and out of that hospital, Ishvalian and Ametrisian alike, only one ever did such a thing. Yet it left a stain mother could never mend. That is why I became an alchemist, to rid the world of those who only desire to hurt. To those who stain any hope for personal gain, those who kill for the sake of bloodshed.”

Eve didn’t reply, so he was really in a fever dream huh? Why choose to sell yourself as a dog when you're not willing to kill? But is killing really validated by that person wanting to kill you? Eve wasn’t so sure. Eve hadn’t been in a war, but they knew a bloodless war was impossible. That stopping war itself was impossible, they nearly killed their brother due to a stupid argument. What moral high-ground did they have? Humans were stupid. 

“I know I sound delusional, but it’s the truth. I want to help people, and help the people who help people. Cruel people aren’t going to disappear, war can’t snap out of existence. We wouldn’t have it if it could, but I like to push the impossible. After all, alchemy is just delusions with science to back it up!” He chuckled softly. “Even if I just make a few people’s lives better, safer, it will all be worth it to me. No matter what it takes.” He looked out at the window, and Eve could tell he had certain people in mind.

“So you gave your life to the military for a pipe dream of defeating evil?” Eve scuffed bluntly, mostly out of curiosity about his reaction. 

“People have given up more to join the military. I don’t have much family left. I don’t want to lose more. Whether I chose to kill is my own choice, but it’s a choice I want. My mother could have said no to everyone who wished for her help, but she didn’t. People died, but most people lived, and most were thankful. War can’t be stopped by pretending it’s not happening. If I want a better future I have to seek it myself. If I’m shipped to war, then I can find the good and the bad, and I can protect them. If I die, then at least I died for something worth living for.” He said and leaned back on the bed. 

_Something worth living for?_ It sounded familiar to Eve, but it was different when Elric said it. It was like he meant it. It was strange, most delusional dogs Eve found barked at the child when Eve questioned their hypocritical logic. Elric on the other hand, it was like he knew. He knew and didn’t care, he wanted to make the world better, but the world was a confusing mess. Not that Eve knew themselves how to make it better, Eve was no better than the woman who killed for Ishvala. They were an impulsive fool who killed for as little as a few taunting words. They couldn’t imagine how they would handle war.

“Sorry for making things awkward,” Ed said nervously, finally realizing the mood had sunken. “Somehow found a way to make you feel worse, didn't I?” He sighed and rubbed the back of his head again.

“No, I asked. It’s a better answer than most dogs give, besides it's my mother’s funeral and you are a complete stranger. How much help did you think you would be?” Eve replied bluntly, a bit absent. 

Elric flushed as red as roses. “Oh yeah, that’s- that’s a fair point. I guess I thought with you staying with my mom and all-“ 

Eve leaped up for the bed. “Trisha’s your mom!?” 

Elric froze a second, before getting a devilish smile. “You have been staying in her house for two weeks and didn’t know that?” 

Eve bit back their embarrassment. Trisha Elric huh? How were they supposed to know that, they were drugged up for two weeks! It’s not like they were going through her mail or anything! “I-I was a little distracted! I could have been dying you know!” Eve puffed up and felt their face go red. 

Elric kept his mocking smile. “Oh? Was it in this room?” He casually walked over to the small dresser and grabbed a picture frame. One Eve was far too empty and bitter the past few weeks to even acknowledge, that was going it backfire hard on them, wasn’t it? He pointed at the four people in the picture, a younger blonde girl, an old woman with her hair in a strangely angular top bun, Trisha in a purple dress, and a smaller Edward in his mother’s arms. 

Eve wanted to die, they wanted to be the one in the coffin, coated in dirt. 

_“Oh, Major Elric, you remembered all your buttons this time.”_ Elric mocked.

“Sh-shut up!” Eve hissed, their face was completely red. They chucked their notebook he had set on the counter at him. 

He burst out into laughter. Eve couldn’t help but smile. Even if they were still thoroughly embarrassed.

“See, I helped a bit.” The man smiled, Eve rolled their eyes. 

“Get out of here, Elric.” Eve hissed, hiding their face far more obviously than they thought. They were still smiling despite themselves. 

“Which one? Trisha is still downstairs.” He mused, setting the frame on the bookshelf.

Eve tightened a look at him, he smirked and said, “Okay, I’m going. You sure you're gonna be alright?” 

“I’m fine. I just have to clean myself up.” Not that they wanted to go back down there and face the music, but avoiding it would only make them look worse. Maybe they could blame it on their sickness? 

“No one is mad at you, you know? Wilks was being a real- a real piss head about the whole thing. Solaris and Selim called him out. It’s no hurry, though, if you want more time to yourself.” El-Edward said, walking closer to the door. 

Eve glanced up, Selim took care of it, then. Selim and that devil woman, but why? Eve wasn’t worth saving face. Unless? Or course, Eve was connected to Selim, he couldn’t risk endangering his reputation. 

Eve huffed a sigh. “I’ll be down soon, I just need a minute.” 

Ed nodded and opened the door, closing it carefully behind him like he was waiting for them to say something more.

After the door closed Eve threw themselves onto the bed. They took a deep breath. Sure talking to Ed made them feel better, and there wasn’t any freshening up they needed to do. That didn’t make dealing with people any less exhausting or annoying, but the show must go on. If Eve wished to have any semblance of a future then they would have to sing and dance once more. 

They dusted off their dress, fixed their hair, and walked down the stairs. 

Ed was right, everyone was showering them in worrisome questions. Even Selim seemed happy to see them back, he was right next to Ed and Trisha. This only made Eve feel stupider for not realizing the pair's clear resemblance earlier or recognizing him from the picture in the room they spent the last two weeks in. They ignored Ed’s knowing look. And they thought they were smug!

Shortly after, the wake continued as if nothing happened. Major Wilks gave them an apology faker than devil woman’s boobs and they accepted with the same fakeness. It was par for the course, almost as if nothing happened. 

Eve looked at their black dress, the eerie reminder something had happened, something horrible. 

Maybe Elric wasn’t so stupid for following a pipe dream? Humans were all stupid and fake, playing parts for the sake of smiles and selfish desire. What did Eve have that validated them a good future? Trisha healed people, Selim was a genius, Edward was delusional but he had hope, a dream. 

All Eve had was a mother six feet under. They didn’t want a future without her. They had no future without her, it was like everything worth moving forward was stripped from them.

Is that what she would have wanted, for them to be so pathetic? So empty? So lost? Clinging to the ever playing delusion that they would wake up and she would be beside them. It would be another day in the garden, putting away fencing and prepping for winter. Mother would be so upset to know her plants were going to die.

Eve knew they were crying again, but didn’t care. It was meaningless, they did everything and failed. They couldn’t move on, not like this. It couldn’t end like this! 

It-they could fix this? Couldn’t they? Was it too late? No… they had to fix this, they had to see her. One more time. 

One more time. 

They just needed one more chance. 

If they failed it was over for good, but if they succeeded... Their fists were clenched, and they opened their eyes with blurry vision. A book was on the wooden table, “Of the Mind and the Body.” _By Levi Warner._

It was the book Trisha read every morning, a medical book of health and wellness- a medical book…

Trisha’s whole shelf was full of them, she was a doctor, after all! Eve felt a spark inside them, a small beacon of hope in a pit of darkness. 

They could heal their own wounds, to heal something must first be created. Creation is a product of chemicals, like herbs in tea or medicines. 

Eve truly felt like a fool, the answer had been in front of them along. Cures and herbs were never the answer, alkahestry is about creation. A scar closes because of the creation of scar tissue, hair is created through blood, blood is created through iron in the body. 

The human body was nothing more than a complex blend of chemicals crushed by a biological pestle. 

Eve smiled, maybe one more chance was all they’d need.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter four might take twice the time since it's a long one! So just know I didn't leave, just working on a big chapter.


	4. The Light Alchemist

Selim shuffled through the thin pile of papers sprawled across the counter, the rings and specks of spillage left from his now half-empty mug of tea. _Ruining papers seems to be the only thing it's good for,_ he cynically noted. He was at Solaris’ apartment. It was two weeks after the funeral. He grabbed a bill from under a few papers and pushed it away from his notebook given to him by Solaris. It was full entrance exam notes and military pointers left by Solaris and Kimblee, despite the notes Kimblee left being more cryptic than helpful, Solaris’ were far more basic and useful. He took a sip of the tea Solaris had brewed for him, it wasn’t as good as his siblings, but it had a hint of caffeine which he needed. Solaris wasn’t fond of giving kids coffee, something about trying to avoid Selim developing a caffeine dependency. Selim thought that was just silly, he was plenty fine to drink coffee. All his tutors would gladly pour him a cup. It was annoying; coffee would have been a million times more useful right now. 

The house wasn’t cheap, despite its location. His mother had been giving the landlord questionable favors in exchange for rent for some time and now with her passing, he was rampant on payment. The two kids were left with a debt twice the cost of the small mansion. It was both of their burdens to bear as far or the landlord knew, but Selim knew it wasn’t Eve’s burden to bear. Eve had no chance at a job, but they didn’t need one. Eve was still a child, with a long future ahead of them. They had been working hard on finding their own path since the funeral and he had no reason to drag his sibling down with their financial burdens. 

There were dozens of bills in front of him. His vision occasionally swam another thing that coffee would have helped with. The current goal was to find out what was their priority. The gas bills were paid, they’d made a dent in the electric bill, but the mortgage? The mortgage was a hefty amount. He was able to convince the landlord to only charge him for the past two years, but his mother had also skipped her taxes. If those weren’t his top priority they would lose the house! But if he didn’t pay their landlord for the house, the landlord would take it back. Then the taxes would be meaningless. Could he pay half and half? He still needed to pay Trisha for room and board, and his tutors, and food and basic amenities, and…

He set his hand on his forehead. He could feel the rough outline of his scar. He had a headache coming on and the tea wasn’t helping. 

_Just three more days_. He thought. Three more days until the test, then he would have a paycheck to rely on. He wasn’t giving up his family home, even if-,

3,000,000 cens. Even with a military salary, it wouldn’t be easy. It would take months at least, years at most. He leaned back in his chair and made a promise. A promise he was going to keep, no matter what. 

He heard Solaris approach behind him, “You look awful.” The woman stated bluntly, wearing a black button-up and white pants, her hair in a loose bun. 

“Thank you, nothing more than an insult to lighten my mood.” Selim snapped lightly. 

The woman sat down in the chair next to him, a full mug of coffee in her hand. Apparently she was allowed to have coffee.

“You don’t need coffee, you need sleep.” The woman said Selim glared weakly as he realized he had been watching her cup like a hawk with prey.

“Sleep isn’t going to make these bills go away.” Selim sighed.

“Neither is staring at them,” Solaris replied, setting her mug on the table. 

“I’m making a financial plan, not staring.” The boy snapped. 

Solaris raised an eyebrow laxly. “A financial plan? You have no income.”

“For when I’m an alchemist,” Selim replied, giving Solaris a harsh, tired look. Of course, it was for when he was an alchemist. She should know that! “I would appreciate it if you didn’t play games with me like this.” He said seriously.

Solaris’s expression softened, a small smile rested on her lips. “My apologies, it just seems silly to me. Someone with your level of foresight should know not to count their chickens before they hatch.” 

Selim sharpened his look at her, his tone was monotone and serious. “I don’t see what you're implying here.”

“You know exactly what I’m implying, you just don’t want to hear it.” The woman replied, her voice smooth like a viper. Her head rested lazily on her hand. Her nails were a dark red and long like a spider’s legs. 

“I have full confidence in my ability to pass the physical exam. There is nothing to hear, if this is a test of doubt, it’s a waste. I know my worth.” Selim shot back, a bit of anger lacing his words. 

Solaris could see the darkness in the boy's eyes, “It’s not about your capabilities, it’s about whether the Fuhrer has use in them. Your skill doesn’t mean you’re not a child. She isn’t so willing to accept a child into the military, it’s a sense of thought.” She tapped her forehead. “It’s potential. If she deems that you have no potential for success, then you are of no use to her.” 

Selim bit back a sassy remark, he was better than that. Clearly Solaris was just testing him. Fuhrer Armstrong would be much harsher than her. He needed a good response, “Then I’ll just prove her wrong like I have everyone else.” He smiled calmly.

Solaris took a sip of her coffee, she set it down nonchalantly. “Fuhrer Armstrong doesn’t make mistakes. You failed the interview.” 

“And how did I fail? Is it not about your honest opinion? A military leader shouldn’t stand on the throne of always being right.” He said back, with pure confidence. It was clearly just Solaris trying to get a reaction from him, it wouldn’t work. 

“No, you failed because of your visible lack of tension when questioned of your abilities. The way your body is lax, it shows no fear but leaves you vulnerable. Your expression is cruel, inviting an attack, but your body is too lax to defend against it.” She said and slammed her foot into the chair Selim was in. 

He fell back and the chair shot to the floor as he rolled to the side away from her. He didn’t have any chalk, so he would have to think of an alternative way to defend himself. She slammed her foot down on the floor. Selim pulled himself up and braced for impact.

Knowing her, she would shoot spikes above. He threw his body flat to the ground. The spikes went right above him, inches from his face. 

His breathing sped up, his heartbeat blasting in his ear. The spikes were all around him, he couldn’t move. Above him were more spikes made of wood, trapping him in a makeshift cage. 

Solaris peered in from above him, a velvety smile on her face. “Impressive.” She said sarcastically.

Selim glared daggers at her, his headache worsened. “That was a dirty trick.” He stated, biting back the urge to say anything more. 

“Don’t invite a fight if you can’t take it.” She smiled innocently. She recalled the spikes and the floor returned to normal. 

Selim pulled himself up, refusing to face the smug woman. He dusted himself off and winced at his pounding head. 

“You should get some rest.” She said, picking up the chair. 

“I don’t need it.” He huffed. His whole body ached from the quick impact. 

“You won’t be any good without it.” The woman sat back down, her coffee was untouched by the previous assault. 

“I have too much work to do.” He said tiredly, he walked back to the lifted chair. 

She chuckled. “For such a skilled alchemist, you certainly don’t practice what you preach.” 

“Oh, is this another riddle?” Selim replied smoothly. 

“Equivalent exchange, equal work for equal rest. I recall the same boy telling me just a month ago it should be second nature for someone who studies alchemy.” The woman replied. 

Selim winced, he did tell her that. Right after Eve had been taken in by Trisha, he could even recall the annoyance and concern in his voice. 

“Guess that makes me a hypocrite, doesn’t it?” He admitted. 

“Afraid so.” Solaris said casually. 

“Fine, but only because I stand by my word.” He huffed, rising from his chair. 

“Of course.” The woman replied, with a soft smugness like she had won something. 

He averted his gaze from her and walked toward the guest room. “I’ll be back, just an hour at most. I still have work to do.” He vowed. 

The woman nodded, “Of course. I won’t touch anything.” 

He tightens his gaze. “You won’t?”

“Swear on my life.” She replied, her hand on her chest. 

He gave her a final look until she disappeared around the corner wall. He pushed open the door to the plain blue guest room, shutting it behind him. 

_It was nearly three in the afternoon, he would be up again by five at the latest._ He promised himself. 

He threw himself on the bed and pulled over the covers. He was asleep in seconds.  
————————  
Whoever said human biology is complicated was a lying bitch. 

Eve flipped through another book, this one about basic biology. Most of Trisha’s books weren’t very complicated, or maybe Eve was too smart for them? Is this how Selim felt all the time? No wonder he was always so smug. 

Selim wasn’t going to be able to pull off what Eve was going to do. No, Eve had a hell of a plan. 

The first step, human biology. Humans were just like tea, made up of hundreds of chemicals that could be brewed into a living body. Chemicals that, in their basic form, could be found in a farmers’ market or supply store. 

Chlorophyll had nitrogen and magnesium, lilacs have carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen. Plants were mostly carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen. The rest of the ingredients could easily be found in medical supplies, household objects, or household cleaners and pest removers. 

Eve couldn’t steal from Trisha, but she had given them some freedom due to their “good behavior”. Which was Eve playing at being a good little girl and doing whatever Trisha asked, whether it was cleaning, helping cook, or sleeping. They had a stupid bedtime again, which was more than a pain. Even worse, Trisha won’t let them bring any books to their room, then would sweep the room like a hawk to make sure they were actually sleeping. It made them feel five years old again. How did Major Elric deal with her for so long?

If it weren’t for her kindness- Eve pushed the thought back. No, that doesn’t excuse her getting in the way. 

At the very least, Eve’s newfound interest made Trisha happy and she was more than willing to answer the few questions Eve had. They choose them carefully as to not be obvious of their true intent.

Trisha wasn’t an alchemist, she wouldn’t understand. 

Human transmutation was banned. Eve knew why alchemists were so blind to their own alchemy. They didn’t think to open the door to alkahestry, which is built on human-based alchemy. Resurrection was just healing with a few more steps, steps Eve had down pat.

Step two would be where all their studying came into play, to create a new body. 

They didn’t have the building blocks for that just yet, they had a lot more testing to do. The first part of building a living, functional body was to fully understand the body's makeup. 

Eve flipped the page in their book, which was currently detailing circulation and blood flow. They had a journal out next to them, already a quarter of it filled with notes on biology. A pencil rested behind their ear, a wicked smile on their lips. 

They still had a long way to go, a month or two at a minimum. After all, they were getting it right this time. 

—————————————————-

Time flew by far too quickly. It was now the morning of the test. Selim was right outside the Central testing building. He was about to do it, about to make history and make his late mother proud. This would give him and his sibling a better future. He had been preparing for this moment his whole life- 

Yet he couldn’t help the way his nerves spun together like ropes in his chest. The last few days passed in a blur, Solaris and Trisha’s insistence on distracting him didn’t help. They truly believed they meant well, so Selim couldn’t blame them. The extra sleep and home-cooked meals were a large help to his health, but his confidence wavered. Could he have used that time more wisely? What if he had? 

He had all the skills he needed, but his age brought something to question. He had to prove his maturity. It wasn’t new to him, his whole life was proving his maturity and natural alchemic talents. Today was different, these were not the men and socialites of a well-dressed party. This was the Fuhrer, a woman of power Selim couldn’t even fathom. He knew he had the capabilities, but even being in her presence was an honor. He has seen her take down men three times her size in seconds flat. To even have the opportunity to prove himself to someone so honorable was a dream. 

He shook the thought away. It wasn’t the time for this, he had to be mature. There was nothing mature about mindless ogling of the Fuhrer’s grace. He had the skills to prove himself, regardless of what mind games Solaris played. He was far more than any of the passing alchemists in years past, not that it was hard for him. He was born for this. 

Solaris was next to him with Kimblee, both in uniform. A uniform Selim would soon be able to wear, a symbol of power and skill beyond any other. Of course, his uniform would have to be customized, since he was pretty small. 

“Nervous?” Solaris asked her hair in a tight bun. She was more kept up than usual. 

“I wouldn’t be very human if I wasn’t.” Selim responded softly, “I take it I’m not the only one.” 

Solaris smirked lightly, “I have good reason to be.” 

Kimblee blew away one of the strange two antenna-like hairs in his face. “Is cowardice ever a good reason? Here I thought you were dressed to catch the Fuhrer’s fancy.” He smiled wickedly. 

“That would only be a waste, wouldn’t it? The Fuhrer doesn’t have time for trivial things.” She replied, her head leaned back gingerly. 

“Hasn’t stopped you before,” Kimblee said matter of factly. 

Solaris didn’t voice a response, she simply gave him a velvety smile. She looked over to Selim and softened her expression to something almost motherly, “You’ll do just fine. The Fuhrer has passed people far less capable. Your alchemy is incredible.” 

Selim nodded. She was right. She only echoed what he was feeling, he had to be proud of his own accomplishments. Failure wouldn’t happen. 

Kimblee pushed the large door open, clearly impatient with Solaris’ pep talk. The large door slowly creaked open, revealing a massive room with a large green Amestrian flag at the end of it, hung in the center. Around him were two long walls with light gray pillars, leading into two hallways on both sides. In front were two balconies, connected to the pillars. Selim assumed there would be two more halls at least on the upper floor. Right above the flag were three large windows on the second floor. There were dark gold and white fencing around the upper floor pathway and balcony. The balcony wrapped around the room in a sharp “U” shape.

He definitely needed a strategy for this or he would be exhausted afterward. That didn’t mean it wasn’t manageable. Solaris stood next to him on his left side, Kimblee the right. A few others were scattered on the balcony to watch, however, they weren’t close enough for him to name them. Everyone looked similar in uniform. He could recognize the two men who stood guard around the door he entered through, Warrant Officer Lockheart and Sergeant Bainchi. He couldn’t see the Fuhrer, she must have not arrived yet. 

He looked at the room one more time, making a plan in his mind. He pulled his gloves out of his pocket, baring his array. They were custom made, a gift from a good friend of his mother's, right before her passing. All he needed to activate them was intent and a snap of his fingers. The finger snap was more for direction but it helped drastically. Even if that help was widely placebo effect, which it very well could be. 

He heard the door near the front of the room creak open. The Fuhrer stepped out, her icy blue eyes gazed forward taking in the whole room filled with a feeling of fear and tension. She was just like she looked in speeches, yet he couldn’t help but feel his chest tighten up, it was different up close. Unlike her speeches, she didn’t speak a word and she didn’t have to. He could feel how tense the room got, everything pointed in her direction. The room was dead silent, it seemed no one even took a breath. Solaris kept her calm expression, while Kimblee looked amused at those around him and the two guards’ retained their silent respectful focus. Strangely enough, Kimblee didn’t once seem to face the Fuhrer President. 

Behind her was her assistant, Colonel Riza Hawkeye, in the same blue uniform. Her dark eyes seemed distant yet watchful. Selim couldn’t see any emotion in them, like dark orbs of a foggy abyss. She had her hair in the same black clipped up bun and was holding a clipboard. Selim could see the indent in the leg of her uniform, where her gun holster was. She was all the security the Fuhrer needed. 

The Fuhrer-President, with her long blonde hair and icy blue eyes, faced Selim. She took a step forward, everyone's gaze followed her. Her gaze was aiming right at Selim. He felt the weight of the world strangling him from all directions, he took a deep breath. The Fuhrer’s expression didn’t change. 

“You must be Selim Van Hohenheim.” She spoke, her words sharp but smooth. 

“Y-Yes. Yes, Fuhrer President.” Selim said, trying to meet her harsh gaze. He couldn’t read her, but the small turn of her lip made his blood run cold.

“You’re the son of the Van Hohenheim of light?” She asked, the same monotone yet sharp tone persisted. 

“Yes, Fuhrer President.” Selim repeated. 

“I never cared for that man.” She replied, for a moment he swore there was amusement in her eyes. 

Another mind game then? His father was far too famous for someone to ‘not care for’ yet he could feel the power in her words. They came out so absently, so casually, like they were nothing to her. He felt a sharp blade of realization in his chest. This was the Fuhrer, she clearly cared, she was just toying with his feelings! She had no interest in fitful children and Selim was far from that. 

Her expression was unmoving, “Let’s begin.” 

Selim nodded, Solaris and Kimblee moving a distance from him. The Fuhrer watched him in her blue uniform, she had a sword sheathed around her waist. It was now or never, everything he had lived for. Selim lifted his hand, snapping his fingers and lighting the array nearly simultaneously.

All the light in the room swept away as tendrils of darkness overtook the main room. He blocked out the windows first, eating away the light and blacking out up to the balcony. Darkness consuming the room all the way up to the ceiling, until the upper floor was nothing but shadows. He could hear the shock of the patrons as darkness consumed them. He left the hallways unscathed, to save energy and show his precision. The rest of the shadow overtook the room and met at the bottom of his feet until the entire room was covered in darkness. 

He could hear the hushed whispers, the hiss of guns leaving their holsters, the sharp clack of heels of those who moved to cling to the wall or rails. He couldn’t help but let it bring a smile to his lips. 

The show wasn’t over yet.

He felt the light in his fingers, pointing up toward the ceiling, focusing the ultra-violet light above him. A spotlight of white exploded from his feet and forward. He refocused and with a sweep of his hand, he split the light down the middle, splitting white light like a spectrum. The rainbow started halfway to the ceiling. 

He sent another spotlight of prism-rainbow light at the Fuhrer., who he could see clearly with his refined night vision. It lit the Fuhrer President and her assistant up with rainbow colors dancing on the pair's faces. He froze, the Fuhrer’s expression was unmoving, she almost seemed bored. Despite the commotion in the room, it fell silent and she regained everyone's attention. 

“Is that all?” The Fuhrer said, almost amused. “How disappointing.” 

Selim felt his blood go cold, after everything he had just done. How could this be disappointing? This was far more than any other alchemist could have dreamed of doing! And with his age, his precision- 

The Fuhrer didn’t move. “The Military has no use in a light show. You fail.” 

He froze as if he could convince himself the words hadn’t happened. Failed? How could he, with a display like that! How dare she-

She just needed a bit more convincing. She couldn’t see the use of his alchemy, then he would show her. Of course, his alchemy was unimpressive, all he did was stand there. This was just another test to prove himself and he wasn’t going to fall for it. 

He swept the white light clean from the room, spotting the pen in her assistant’s hand. He’d show them how useful his alchemy could be. He could see perfectly clear in the dark, the figures moving around him were of no interest. The two guards were approaching best they could in the blinding darkness, while Solaris’ and Kimblee’s silhouettes remained frozen. The Fuhrer was unmoving, her assistant remained still. He ran at the pair, sweeping across Riza to grab the pen from her grip. He yanked it out, turning-

Then saw the Fuhrer’s silhouette in front of him, but how? It was only a second ago she- 

Pieces of something above him fell into vision before swiftly falling to the ground-hair. His hair. All the light-flooded back into the room, as if nothing happened. The Fuhrer’s sword was unsheathed, her cold gaze drilling holes into him. 

“I-I…” Was all Selim could muster. He felt his whole body shaking, her icy look pointed toward the left of him at the pen in his hand. 

She was silent for a moment, then her expression ‘soften’ as much as it could. “Hm.” 

He could feel people watching him and all he could do was bask in his own regret. What was he thinking? He really thought he could attack the Fuhrer! What if he had missed the pen, she would have-

“You pass.” She said Selim couldn’t move. 

_He what?_

The Fuhrer turned away, without so much as a glance at him. The assistant tightened her look at Selim, he almost saw emotion in her eyes, before she turned to follow. 

Selim saw everyone around him, watching him dumbfoundedly. The two guards put away their guns, no, everyone put away their guns. How had he not noticed how many guns were pointed at him before? The secretaries and office-based employees were shaking, leaning against the walls for railings above. Even with all the light in the room, some people still covered their eyes to adjust, or from fear, he didn’t know. 

The Fuhrer and her assistant shut the door from which they had entered, with that they were gone. 

Selim felt his forehead, a clean-cut of hair missing right above his scar. 

Solaris approached him. “Selim? Are you alright?” 

Kimblee was behind her, he looked almost like he had been laughing. 

Selim smiled weakly. “I told you I would pass.”  
_________________________________________________

Two weeks had passed since that fateful day. Selim had made good use of that time keeping up with his studies, it helped that Eve was focused on their own. With both of them at the table, books in front of them. It almost felt like before, but this was different. It was the future, the future that would only open new doors for them.

He knew it would only take Eve a month to learn to love Central. Still, seeing his sibling pleasantly taking notes from one of Trisha’s college books with a cup of tea beside them was a nice change. They deserved to be happy, with everything that the pair had gone through. They both deserved happiness. 

Selim took a sip of the coffee that he finally got Trisha to allow him to drink. Apparently all he had to do was join the military to prove he could handle caffeine, though it could have been his previous stress. Stress that was pointless since he passed with flying colors. The thought was still so foreign to him, he had achieved his lifelong dream, his future was now in his hands. He earned it, yet he had to keep moving forward. Father didn’t become a legend in a day, he earned it over time. 

Today was the day Selim took his next step forward. He had already made history by being the youngest person to pass the state exam. He will be getting his uniform tonight at Central headquarters. The measurements were taken a day after his exam, all the paperwork was filled out. He could only imagine finally wearing it, to have the power in his hands to craft his legacy-

“Wow, you’re pathetic.” His sibling mused, snapping him out of his daydream. 

“I’m pathetic for having a dream?” He shot back casually. 

“No, you’re pathetic for having a shallow and empty dream, but hey, you’ll fit in perfectly with those dogs you love so much.” His sibling said, a hint of malice in their voice. He didn’t expect them to like the military or support his decisions. Mountains weren’t moved in a day, after all. 

“The military is essential to a stable country, I only intend to use my knowledge and power for a bigger and better future for us.” He said honestly, pride in his voice. 

“Sure you do. Just like all of mom’s fuck dolls and war heroes. I bet you’re gonna bring all of Central to peace by shining a big light into the sky, right?” Eve glanced away briefly, lazily facing toward the kitchen. 

Selim gazes a disapproving look. “If you don’t approve of my decision, I can’t make you, but once I’m in uniform you can’t be disrespectful like this, you know?” 

“Yeah, I have to be twice as disrespectful. Maybe spit on ya’ for good measure.” His sibling set a hand to their face and let out a light chuckle. 

“You're so childish.” Selim said with amusement. 

“Yeah, well, children are known for that. Right, infant alchemist?” Eve said with a malicious grin. 

“Light Alchemist.” Selim sharply corrected. 

Eve gave him a once over, leaning back in their chair. “Yeah, I don’t know about that one.”

Selim saved them another look and went back to his book. It wasn’t worth the argument, Eve just needed time to get over their stubbornness as usual. He could hear them let out a cruel chuckle. Selim let them have it. His sibling was happy, as petty as they were. They were only a child, after all. 

The rest of the afternoon continued as usual, with Eve supplying their snarky remarks every so often. Selim did his best to ignore them or snark back if necessary. 

Eve spent the time they weren’t in study cleaning the kitchen or cooking. They didn’t offer Selim much, but he was older, he could provide for himself. They were focused in a way that was all too familiar, like with their mother in the garden. They wore a thin smile like it was made for them, that never seemed to fade but rather adapt slightly to every emotion. Their face was freckle spotted and lacked the paleness it had the past month, not even purple bags lingered under their eyes. The broken child, screaming with tears rolling down their face seemed like a distant memory. 

It was barely a month ago. 

Eve sharpened their pencil as they circled something from an old medical book. The older ones were fine to mark up. Trisha had found some from her colleagues and storage. The rest were the same ones that normally sat on the shelves, picking up dust. Now they all sat in a pile beside his sibling, high enough to meet the top of their leg. The rest were open and scattered on the table, leaving just enough space for his own stuff. 

Meanwhile, he spent his time with books on the military, books Eve refused to even glance at. They contained the rules and etiquette he needed to follow. This was no longer about alchemy, this was about class and pushing himself forward. His age was a gift, not a burden, and he had no intention of letting anyone down. He could memorize the rules like it was nothing, speak the military language, and he already knew every name. Putting it into action was different, but in a month or two he would be just fine. 

Soon Edward came home. He had promised to drive Selim to Central Headquarters even if Selim could walk. Ed just wanted an excuse to go home early. 

He opened the door, the same joyful look on his face as this morning. He took a deep breath before promptly bumping into the side table, clearing lost in thought over something. He seemed numb to the pain and simply strolled over to the table with an expression that could only be described as a pleasant daze. 

“So?” He turned to Selim, with far too much excitement in his voice. “Today’s the day!” 

“It certainly seems that way.” Selim replied, even if it seemed Ed was only half talking to him. “I take it, it's been a pleasant day.”

Ed’s face went cherry red, and he adjusted his round glasses.”No! Just...This is a big day for you!” 

Selim chuckled, Ed’s feelings were written all over his face in screaming black ink. “You seem awfully embarrassed for me.” 

Ed shot a look in the other direction as if it would make his face any less red. “That’s- We should get in the car! You know, to make it on time. I have a few pla-errands to run so…” His words lingered off, he huffed a bit. 

If this is what other State Alchemists were like, Selim would be just fine. 

He glanced over to Eve, wearing the same deeply amused expression while holding back their laughter. 

The ride there was short, but Elric didn’t seem shy to ask ‘subtle’ questions. The streets slowly rolled by while Elric tried to poorly keep his secrets. There weren't many people on the streets this late in the day, the ride was short due to the hospital's distance from the headquarters. It would only be barely ten minutes before they were there, yet time fell slowly like the red leaves of the trees. The sun was already setting and it was barely six if only things like that were a bother to Selim.

“Like, theoretically, if you were getting-” Ed continued. 

“So you are getting married,” Selim replied, half focused on the window. 

“No, this is theoretical!” Ed insisted, his face red again. 

“Oh, so it’s for a friend?” Selim mused. 

“Yes-No, kind of! Just answer the question.” Ed insisted with clear fluster in his tone. 

“No, I would find a massive firework display extremely ridiculous. Just bake her a pie, she likes those.” Selim replied lazily.

“Why?” Ed shot back, almost confused. 

“She likes pie.” Selim continued. 

“Yes, but what if the fireworks exploded into the shape of a pie?” Ed said with a wide smile. 

Selim rolled his eyes. “That is far worse. Where would you even set off all those firewo-” 

“That’s it! Thanks, Selim, you were a big help!” Ed replied eagerly. Selim chuckled softly. Why did he even bother asking him, then?

Once at Central Headquarters, Ed slowed the car to a stop. Elric parked the car and the two walked over to the large platform, Elric flashed his watch to the guard in front. After a brief conversation, the platform started to creak forward.

“Once we get up just follow me, it shouldn’t take too long to grab your uniform.” The Major said with a smile. 

“Do you think I’ll be transferred to East City?” Selim asked. 

Edward thought it over. “East City? I won’t set your hopes too far up, I’m still doing paperwork. Don’t think I’m going anywhere anytime soon.“ Ed grumbled at the thought of it. 

“I see,” Selim replied, that was good. Moving was something he was worried about, at least if he was to be transferred to East City it was closeby to the Elrics’ old family home. Eve would have a place to stay and be safe, but to stay where they were would be even better.

“Yeah, just expect a lot of paperwork. A lot of stupid, unnecessary, repetitive paperwork.” Elric lolled his head back a bit. 

“If it’s truly unnecessary then why are you doing it?” Selim replied quizzically at Elric's theatrics. 

“Same reason people put milk in coffee.” Elric grumbled roughly as if his statement made a lick of sense. 

The platform lifted them into the vast courtyard that had large stone paths that lead to the huge U-shaped building from all angles. The building was coated in windows, and at least four floors high and made of gorgeous gray-white stone. In the center of the ‘U’ shape stood the massive flag, green with a lion-like insignia dancing in the wind of the darkening sky. 

Selim was buzzing with excitement. He was so close to everything he had worked for, all he had to do was pass through those doors. The doors of a gorgeous old building that he would become very familiar with, which carried mystery and potential beyond his imagination. He couldn’t help the smile on his face. For once it felt so real, it felt so close.

Elric smiled himself, maybe for the same reason? Selim didn’t care. His eyes were locked on the gray delicately bricked building and the double doors rapidly approaching him. 

Elric didn’t say anything, he appeared lost in memories himself. It was hardly two years for him, wasn’t it? “It’s really something isn’t it.” He said softly. 

Selim looked over. “You know, I heard it was built seventy years ago. It took four straight years to get the craftsmanship up to standard.” 

Elric laughed. “Yeah, guess it is pretty neat. Kind of thought it would be older than that.” 

They both kept their approach, yet Elric knew. The building history meant nothing to Selim, it never did. 

Once inside they crossed the large testing floor, Elric seemed to beeline for the secretary’s desk. “We are here to pick up Major Hohenheim's uniform.” Ed stated, the blonde secretary nodded and opened her desk. 

Selim couldn’t help but smile. Major Hohenheim. He was Major Hohenheim…

He felt a twist in his chest, but he quickly suppressed it.

“Yes, Major Hohenheim. Congratulations!” The woman smiled, Selim snapped his attention back at her. Blonde hair, green soft eyes, a red bracelet, tanned skin and a slightly curved nose. 

“Thank you, Private Ester Seibels.” Selim greeted with a more composed yet prideful expression. 

“My, how polite! Not a lot of people know my name, especially people I haven’t met before. Aren’t you just the cutest, Major.” Ester replied, clearly with good intent yet it felt like a jab to his chest. 

Selim didn’t show a change of expression and simply nodded kindly. “What good is an alchemist who can’t even remember a name.” Selim said, keeping his professional composure. He was a child, he reminded himself, so all they would see is a child. They have no way of knowing how mature and intelligent he truly is, this was just a taste of what it would be like. 

“Very well said, wish some of the other alchemists had your logic.” The woman said with a slight eye roll, strangely enough, it was away from Elric.

“So? About the uniform?” Ed piped up quickly, a bit more wound up than a few seconds ago.

“Oh! Right!” The woman picked up the phone and began dialing. 

“Wait, what’s that for?” Ed asked, his slight buzz seemed to be more of a nervousness. 

“To notify the Fuhrer of your arrival of course! You're meeting with her to speak about the uniform, correct?” Ester smiled, a far too innocent smile, as she spoke of hell itself like it was a campfire. 

Selim’s blood ran cold, he glanced up to Ed, who startled back with a lost expression. The Fuhrer-President wanted a private audience with him? What for?

She picked up the phone and sweetly responded. “Sir, Major Hohenheim, and Major Elric have arrived. Would you like me to send them up?” 

Ed rubbed the back of his neck, shooting a confused yet guilty look to Selim. Selim took a deep breath, it seemed he wasn’t being set up. His last experience with the Fuhrer President had been far from pleasant, could she have received the wrong idea? Was this to further prove himself? In his mind, he passed, but of what accord? In hers, it seemed he only passed by the tip of her blade. 

He did pass, he was being referred to as Major. He was a Major, so why did she need a private audience? Had he intimidated her? Was she simply curious about the young Major? He was the youngest to ever join such a prestigious rank with an upbringing of success and mystery. Even with that thought being so sensible, her words rang in his ears. Her absent disinterest and disgust in his father, was it a fallacy? Was it to hold her ground? A stance of power? 

Selim couldn’t decipher a thing from the icy cold Fuhrer, their exchange was far too brief. The stories surrounding her were far too varied. The only consistent note, one Selim had seen himself, was her sharp blue eyes and swordsmanship that surpassed human speed. She was delicate as a lily, with her blue eyes and blonde hair, yet moved so fast in the darkness. Soft, pale, like a siren of death, or an inpatient banshee. 

They were now walking towards her office, Selim had been so lost in thought he hadn’t noticed when Elric pulled him along. The major was visibly shaken but kept a close and straight line of step. He hid his demeanor under a layer of balance, that hadn't traveled to his fogged thought driven eyes. 

“Is this your first time meeting the Fuhrer?” Selim asked. 

Elric looked over, his eyes still fogged in thought. “No, I have met her once or twice briefly. Mostly in large meetings or in the hall, she never pays any attention to me. Not that she has to, to her I’m just another alchemist to babysit.” There were chunks of malice in his voice. 

“Hmm…” Selim hummed softly, gathering his own thoughts. Just another alchemist to babysit? Major Elric’s skills were rather impressive, but not to Selim’s scale. Maybe that was the reason for the private audience, to prove he was more than a child that needed to be babysat?

“We’re here.” Elric gestured to the large double doors in front of them. 

Selim nodded, pushing back the nerves that had no place in his chest. He had no reason for them, they were only an inconvenience. 

Elric was visibly tense as he knocked on the wooden door, only tenser when footsteps were heard. 

The Fuhrer’s assistant opened the door, Colonel Riza Hawkeye greeting the pair with the same cold, dark eyes. Even from the crack in the door Selim could see how large the room was, with two massive windows in the back giving it all its illumination. Major Elric caught the Colonel’s stoic gaze, turning his expression sour. 

“Major Elric, Major Hohenheim.” She greeted in perfect monotone, “Please come in, Major Hohenheim.” 

“Of course, thank you Colonel Riza-” Selim began placing his hand on his forehead in salute, trying to keep all the politeness he could. Elric didn’t salute, nor even make a movement to, Selim noted briefly. 

“Please, just Riza is fine.” The woman corrected her hand up lightly, an ounce of gentleness had snuck into her tone. Did she truly feel like they were already past formalities? Or was the colonel kinder than she let on? Selim couldn’t place it. 

Major Elric had already turned to make his exit, he was not needed anymore, so Selim didn’t bother to stop him. He seemed tense and Selim would rather avoid the drama of why. It was far too early in his career to be digging into gossip. 

“Major Elric.” The woman said in her perfect monotone, all slivers of gentleness gone. “I did not dismiss you.” 

“My apologies, Colonel.” Elric said with lingering spite overcasting his respect. He turned back, facing the Colonel with a look of unearned irritation. 

_Elric was never any good at hiding his emotions,_ Selim thought solemnly.

“Please come with me, I have some things I wish to discuss your filling in your latest report.” The women said, meeting Elric’s eyes in a way that held a strange amount of force. 

Elric failed to hide his eye roll, then spoke with annoyed defeat. “Yes, Colonel.” 

With that she made her way out of the doorway, leaving space for Selim to enter.

He stepped in, holding an air of confidence. He wasn’t sure if it was warranted, he was getting nothing but mixed signals since he arrived. The room was large, with a massive bookshelf on one side of it, and a table and chairs on the other side. In the center sat the Fuhrer-President, on an expressive wooden desk with eloquent carvings along with it. She wore an expression Selim could only describe as cold interest. 

There was a snake in a cage next to her, the cage had thick wiring as to not let the ever curling creature escape. 

Selim heard the door shut behind him, he raised his hand in salute to the Fuhrer. “Major Hohenheim. Present, sir.” He said with a louder respectful tone. 

She raised an eyebrow, nothing more. Little expression was a pattern both her and Riza were becoming known for to Selim. “Major, do you know why I called you here today?” She asked, idly watching the pen in her hands. 

Selim knew that pen. 

“Yes, sir, Fuhrer President.” He responded, slowly lowering his salute. 

“Good, that saves me some trouble.” She said, setting the pen down. “Sit down.”

Selim did as he was told robotically, hushing the anxiety building in him harshly. 

“My assistant tells me you and your sister lost someone recently.” The woman didn’t meet his gaze, she didn’t have to, her tone alone chilled the whole room. Someone? Riza would know who, the Fuhrer must be testing his honesty, but why?

“Yes, sir. Our mother.” Selim replied solemnly, now sitting in the elegant wooden chair.

“I’m sorry for your loss.” The Fuhrer replied, a bit of sympathy in her serious voice. 

“Thank you, sir.” Selim nodded, holding himself strong.

“Your mother owed quite a few debts. Dante was it?” She asked. 

Of course, she knew, she couldn’t know of his mother's debts but not her name. “Yes, however, I wasn’t made aware of them until recently.” 

“That must be hard on you.” She stated, glancing at him from the side with her visible eye. 

“It’s nothing I can’t manage, but I thank you for your concern.” He said he knew this was leading to something? Was it mourning? Could that be why she passed him, why she forgave him for his perceived attack?

“What about your sister?” Fuhrer Armstrong asked.

“They are doing quite well, all things considered. They are strong, I have faith in them.” He replied, noting a slight shift in the Fuhrer's expression.

“Stronger than you?” She asked. 

For some reason, Selim couldn’t find an easy answer for the question. He could be honest, but he felt it wouldn’t help with his first impression being such a shamble. He couldn’t tell the Fuhrer to her face he knew to mourn better than his younger sibling, not when that wasn’t the truth. Was it? 

“They are taking it well, but it will still take them more time. They are only a-” child after all. Selim was only two years older than them. “A sheltered person- Central, being without mother, it's all very new to them. I’m not sure if our mourning is something to be compared.” 

“So they are stronger than you?” Fuhrer Armstrong restated. 

“Well, sir, I can’t say. They are holding themselves quite well-” Selim began. 

“You can’t say?” The Fuhrer said with sharpness in her voice. 

“Well not like that it's just-” Selim’s nerves began to tie in his chest, he meant no disrespect he was simply answering. How could she take it so wrong?

“I am your superior, am I not?” She demanded, her voice wasn’t raised, but it was as harsh as a long winter. 

“Yes, Fuhrer-President.” Selim responded, keeping his head low. 

“When you superior asks you a question you answer, correct?” She continued. 

Selim nodded. “Yes, Fuhrer-President.” 

“Then why can’t you give me an answer?” She said, not meeting his eyes with her cold force. 

“My apologies, Fuhrer-President.” He nearly muttered. 

“What good is a soldier who cannot answer a simple question?” 

“No good, sir.” He said. 

“Then I ask you one more time, _soldier_ , is your sister stronger than you?” She reinstated, for the final time. 

He looked up to face the Fuhrer, her eyes drilling a hole through his head. “No, sir.” He responded. 

The Fuhrer let out a weak chuckle. “And whose fault is that?” 

Selim’s eyes widened, _fault?_ Who else's fault could it be? Their mourning was something out of his control. He had done everything he could to support them. 

“A soldier supports every member of their troop, if they are not equal to you, they are above you. If they are below you-” Her eyes tightened and she raised her head. “-then you have failed by your own admission.”

Selim didn’t respond, he wasn’t sure how to. He hadn’t failed, he had been the best brother he could. He knew what Eve needed and respected their boundaries, they were his younger sibling, not a soldier. Those two things had no place near each other, familial bonds were far deeper than that.

The woman rose from her desk and Selim peeped in response. 

She didn’t seem to hear it or rather didn’t react to it. She walked over to the cage holding the thin gray and brown snake. The snake approached her as she neared, best it could inside the wires of the cage. She opened the lock on the cage, grabbing the snake as if it was nothing. 

Selim didn’t move, if she was going to make him hold the snake he could handle it. It seemed that would be a good intimidation factor. He held his composure strong when the Fuhrer looked over to him. 

“This is an orsini viper, it tends to the pests in my office.” She dropped it on the ground, it slithered off to a corner. “It is very efficient.” 

Selim continued to watch the Fuhrer, wanting to see where this was going. 

“Snakes are clever hunters, don’t you agree?” She walked back to her desk, reaching for something under it. “Especially in groups.” 

Selim spiked up, groups? So how many snakes were in this room already? 

The Fuhrer raised a cage with a rabbit in it, it was gray and sat uncomfortably in the cage. “But humans are much more intelligent, a single human can kill hundreds if necessary. It raises the question, what is of higher value? Coverage or efficiency?” 

Selim kept his eyes on the Fuhrer. “Efficiency, to be able to remove multiple targets at once is a soldier's duty, sir.” 

The Fuhrer opened the cage, the rabbit dashed out onto the floor. “The rabbit is of my family, it is quite old. I would like you to kill it.” 

Selim froze. “Pardon, sir?” 

The Fuhrer looked back at him, almost unphased. “I would like to have rabbit stew tonight, it is worthless to me alive. Once bitten, the meat is inedible, kill it.” 

Selim looked back to the old rabbit, it was now humbled in a corner. The bookshelves were all slightly above group, meaning snakes could be hiding under any one of them. He couldn’t use the darkness, snakes could see quite well in the darkness. 

“Are you resisting an order, Major?” She sharpened her look to him. 

Selim shook his head. “No, sir.” 

“Kill it.” 

He rose up, he didn’t bring his gloves, he was under the impression they weren’t needed. The rabbit shuffled and Selim could see the tails catching the hints of light under the bookshelves. He shot a look at the desk, the only pen was in the Fuhrer’s pocket, the rest of the desk was picked clean. 

“Major.” 

Selim looked to the floor, he needed a plan and fast. The rabbit was unmoving, but he could see the tails approaching it. He slammed his foot on the ground, the rabbit lunged out to another corner. He couldn’t use alchemy and there didn’t seem to be any weapons. He wouldn’t use the Fuhrer’s books and he would have to be a complete utter fool to raid her desk. Which left him with very little options but his own two hands and feet. 

He couldn’t-no, it was too heartless. He could see the impatience in her eyes, he had already disappointed her. He couldn’t let it happen again! 

He slowly approached the dark corner the rabbit hobbled in. It was quaking rapidly. Its old eyes were wide with animalistic fear. Selim took a silent breath, it wasn’t ideal but there was no time. No resources, the Fuhrer likely planned it so. If he waited anymore then the snakes would approach. He could already see them from the next corner the rabbit found solace in. 

How many were even in the office? It seemed they came from every corner. 

He got as close as he could to the corner, he could hear the slithering right under his feet. He took a deep breath, locking eyes with the rabbit in the small space. It was just enough to fit a hand through.

“Kill it, that is an order!” The Fuhrer demanded behind him, at that moment his hand snapped at the large rabbit, grabbing it by its neck. He couldn’t think about the snake he could see watching his hand like prey, or the Fuhrer behind him, he needed to focus. 

The rabbit shook and scrapped at his grip, he tightened it as he dragged the struggling creature. Its limbs bounced around. Its claws dug into his hand. He couldn’t think about it. Its breathing was heavy, rapid, he could hear the scrapping of its claws on the floor. Using a sharp pull of brute force to get it off the floor. 

It dangled in front of him, quaking and panicky, its nose flickering up in down rapidly. It was still breathing. He straightened his grip on the animal, its claws curled into his skin from all four directions. The pain was meaningless to him. 

With a final whimper and a sharp crack, the rabbit’s head fell limp. 

It was torn from his hands, the Fuhrer tossed it absently onto her desk. He could see the blood dripping from the broken bone that jetted from its neck. 

“Next time, be faster.” Was all she said, before cracking open the door to her office. “Dismissed.” 

Selim stood frozen for a moment as if his own thoughts were screaming at him. Yet no noise was made in his mind. His left hand dripped with specks of blood, his fingers quaking lightly. It was probably just pulsing from the force, somehow he knew that wasn’t the answer.

“Dismissed.” She repeated, sharper. Snapping Selim out of his trance, his hand went to his forehead to salute. 

“Y-yes, sir.” He mentally scolded himself for the stutter of his voice. He walked out the door without a second thought, it wasn’t worth embarrassing himself any further. 

The door shut behind him, and he was back in the long hallway. He could see Elric still speaking with Colonel, or rather just Riza. How long was he in there? Maybe five, ten minutes, why did it feel so much longer? He felt completely drained like it had been hours. 

He saw the Colonel, who met his eyes briefly before handing Edward a midsized cloth-wrapped bundle. The woman turned slowly and walked in near-silent past Selim. Swiftly like a shadow in his eyes, before she opened the door and entered the office he was frozen in front of. 

He shook all of his feelings away, he did it! He proved himself, and from Elric’s weak smile he could tell the entire exchange was over. He almost felt guilty for the relief they both seemed to share. 

They walked back to the car with very little words to spare, only bits and pieces of small talk. Whatever energy the two had before was zapped away completely, leaving only tiny exchanges of false excitement. Of course, Selim was excited, as was Edward, but they were more excited to be on their way. 

After all, Edward had just been scolded from what Selim could tell, and Selim had to try on his uniform. He had to make it official. Despite his begging for Ed to let him hold the cloth-bound clothing the Major found far too much enjoyment in denying it, taunting Selim for his giddiness. Selim only found humor in it, as if the Major was one to talk about overexcitement. I mean it was only Selim's biggest goal in life and first step for the future. If anything, he wasn’t nearly excited enough. 

He spent most of the car ride back watching the cloth-bound lump in the backseat, the thoughts of the previous moments quickly fleeting. He had passed, that was all that mattered. He didn’t have to think of the pen, or the Fuhrer or the claw marks on his hand from a fragile creature begging to-it was old. If he didn’t kill it, the Fuhrer would have. It was only a rabbit after all. 

Soon he was home, busting the car door open to grab the package in the backseat. Ed didn’t even make a move as Selim snatched the package and dashed upstairs, nor did Selim hear his sibling's bitter snicker from downstairs. 

Selim unwound the cloth from on his bed, the soft fabric slid off easily. He could see that startlingly powerful blue and gold, lifting the small jacket with a thin chain around its pocket. The reflective star on the shoulder and gold bars. The fabric felt wonderful on his fingers, like silk despite its clear durability. He felt a ping in his chest, disregarding it as nothing but his own excitement. 

He shut the door to his room, slowly changing into the uniform piece by piece as if it was as fragile as Fall leaves. The pants first, that felt soft and oddly sturdy despite their natural bagginess. Then the overcoat along his waist bottomed up tightly and firmly with the tails hanging out a little too long despite his measurements being taken. He found it strangely endearing. He skipped the leather gun holster, maybe for another time. Then the jacket, over his white button-up shirt. It easily went over his arms and around his back, the sleeves sitting at the perfect length ending at his wrists. He buttoned the top, folding the right side over the other just like instructed in the book he had read the night before. 

The last piece was the watch, which sat on top of a white letter stamped with red wax. He held the watch in his hands, it was thick silver with the lionlike crest wrapped in olive vines, clicking the top to pop it open he could see the simplistic white design. The black second's hand ticking away, the hour hand idle. It would need some alterations to be useful to him and he knew just the ones to make. 

He shut the watch and set it down, without the gun belt there was nowhere to fasten it. It didn’t matter. He reached for the letter, slowly opening it. 

The lettering was eloquent, detailed curled ends to every letter, yet rushed in a way Selim couldn’t describe. It was like all the work was done in a matter of seconds, despite the hours worth of craftsmanship in penmanship. The paper was brown, with a gold border, and the lion-like crest in the center.

_This official document certifies that the nation of Amestris, prefecture of the Generalissimo, appoints the name Light to Selim Van Hohenheim, in the name of Fuhrer Olivier Mira Armstrong._

_The State Alchemist shall follow all orders and policies of the military._

_A research assessment examination shall be held once every year. In the case that the State Alchemist does not show signs of progress in his research in the results of the examination, he shall be discharged from the services of State Alchemist._

_The State Alchemist is entitled to the use of ample research funds, unrestricted access to classified documentation, access to various governmental facilities, and a military rank equal to that of "Major"._

_\-- Olivier Mira Armstrong_

Selim stared at the letter, Light? Hohenheim of Light. It sounded right, it sounded perfect. He saw a wet mark on the paper, was it there before? Maybe-

His face felt wet, he looked up to the small mirror in his room. His eyes were glossy, tears weakly rolled down his face. Why? Isn’t this what he wanted? This is everything he worked for! Everything in his life! Everything-

Everything she wanted for him. 

She would never be around to see it. He set the letter down on the bed so as not to ruin it and sat down on the floor. The emptiness in his chest only at the thought of his reflection. Why wasn’t he happy? This was everything he wanted but- he wiped his eyes. The tears didn’t stop and he felt a strange solace in them. They would dry on his uniform, as would the blood left by the cuts from the rabbit's claws, his mother would hate for him to get it stained so quickly. He knew his sibling was downstairs and Elric was likely waiting for him, but his body felt like lead. He couldn’t shake her smile from his head, fresh and full of life. 

“I always knew you looked great in blue.” He could hear her say, her hand on his shoulder. When he closed his eyes he swore he could see her next to him.

“I’m proud of you…” He muttered as if those words held any meaning. He leaned back, refusing his body's urge to curl in on itself, to shut down entirely. 

He was a soldier now. Soldiers didn’t cry. Soldiers didn’t shrink into themselves like children. 

The thought made no difference, his body had its own plans. For once he was too tired to stop it. He was just glad his tears were silent. He had to be strong, even if for now it was only an illusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the absence, but I will get back to posting likely bi-weekly. The chapters will be much longer now, so it will take longer to get them beta'd and posted! Thanks for your patience.


	5. Author Notice

I’ve been depressed lately and busy with lots of projects, I have to do a lot of plot work to finish the series. (The barebones just aren’t enough to carry if through) I want this to be a good fic, so for that reason I have been absent. The whole middle of the fic is rather jumbled, this is something I have been tending to imbetween projects. 

Obviously recent events has not helped much(I feed off of social interaction). I am also unsure if I still have a beta for my chapters. I will try and have things organized life wise again, and finish this fic once its plot is solid. I am hoping to start again in a month, thank you all for your patience.


	6. The Calm Before the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is not all that bad, all the triggers and notes up here are a new thing just in case some people are affected by those things. I am just noting what some people would want warning of! I would rather people be comfortable when reading my fic. (I will be doing this for the chapters forward as well!)
> 
> There is jokes about incest in this chapter, but they are from Eve and very light-hearted without going into detail. They are pg-13 kid-maybe even younger- level jokes.
> 
> Also gender talk, and mentions of dysphoria and misgendering related to it being 1910. (So sadly there is very little information on things like being non-binary, but 100% of the misgendering is Eve's denial.) 
> 
> Brief abuse mentions when talking about past events, like two to three paragraphs at most. No details.

Eve opened the small brown cabinet, glancing over to Edward who was eagerly wiping down the table. “How much of this shit is for Selim anyway?” They said, failing to hide the bitterness in their voice. 

“Does it matter?” Ed asked, wiping down the worn wooden chairs. Wasn’t Trisha a doctor? Couldn’t she buy new chairs? Couldn’t Elric, an alchemist, fix the scratches?

“He’s gonna make it about himself you know?” Eve huffed, grabbing a small stack of plates from the cabinet. They were white with simple green curl patterns along the sides of them.

“Let him, this is his childhood dream. Man, if I was him I would shove it in everyone's face. He can’t even drink and he's got more authority than half the people in the city.” Elric chuckled a bit, “He did a lot to earn it. Let him enjoy himself.” 

Eve walked over to the table with a weak grin on their lips. “Right, ‘earned’.” They rolled their eyes and began to set down the plates one at a time around the wooden rectangular table.

Elric smirked, making Eve twitch in response. 

“What?” They mused, a bit cruelly. “It’s not really earning if you were shipped off to every fancy tutor and alchemist in Central is it?”

“As opposed to being entirely self-taught?” Ed mused back, walking toward the kitchen again. 

“At least it’s work, more than you can say for Major Van hand-outs upstairs,” Eve replied with disdain. 

“Sure.” Elric’s smirk widened. Did he open the silverware drawer- silverware from the draw? Were they seriously going to eat off the same plates they ate breakfast from? How casual was this dinner? 

“You two really are from a farm, aren’t you?” Eve thought out loud. 

“Excuse me?” Ed asked, walking over with one hand full of knives, the other full of forks. 

“This is a formal dinner, right?” Eve asked, now back in the kitchen. Trisha never told them where the silk napkins were and after the third drawer Eve was starting to think they had to use cloth. The thought disgusted them.

“Not 'formal' formal. No reason too either, Winry is family.” The young man seemed to take pride in the last words he’d said. 

“You're from a farm, isn’t everyone family?” Eve said with a hint of malice and a slightly comedic tone.

Ed tightened a glare at the child in the kitchen. “First of all, Winry literally is family! She is my fiance and I’ve known her since we were kids-” 

“So she’s like your sister? Wow, you really are farmers.” Eve shot back nonchalantly, they could see veins in Elric’s temples.

He finished placing the forks and knives, haphazardly Eve might add and was heading back to the kitchen. “She is not my— not even close! How could you even assume that!? We were neighbors! Neighbors! Those are two very different things! The Rockbells were friends of my mother-” 

“Friends with benefits?” Eve snarked. 

Elric was speechless, his finger in the air for a scolding that would never come. He looked halfway between breaking the wall next to him and pure shock. “D-did you just-” 

“I mean there is only, like, three houses in resumbuld right? What else is she going to do?” Eve opened another cabinet, trying to hide their pure glee every time they caught Elric’s expression. 

“Re-se-mb-ool.” He loudly corrected, taking a deep breath while fidgeting with his glasses.

“Yeah, I’m sure it was a resem-pool of something.” Eve snided, finally giving up and taking the dirt brown, dull, rough, plain, cloth napkins. 

Elric snapped and got into Eves' face, who hardly held in their laughter.“It is a resem-pool of perfectly reasonable people! A perfectly reasonable town with good diverse people,” Eve heard the door open but it seemed Elric was too into his own words to hear it. “With independent lives working good honest jobs! Not some two-timing tiny ass group of houses full of sibling fuckers with no regards for basic decency and hygiene-” 

“That's weirdly specific. Is there something you would like to talk about, Mister Elric?” Eve mused, glancing slightly to the left of him to the strange blonde woman who had entered. 

Ed froze, slightly turning his head to see the strange woman. His expression shattered and he was as red as the hideous button-up he was wearing. “Oh...Hi Winry.” He squeaked. 

“Hi, Ed.” The woman responded simply, with clear rage in her eyes. “Ed?” 

“Y-Yes?” He barely made out, and Eve’s smile was so wide it came off their face. 

“Why are you shouting at a child?” The woman, Winry, asked plainly. 

“Sh-she started it.” Was all he said. 

She whacked him with a wrench that she had on hand, which surprised Eve but the more they thought about it, the more it seemed about right for Elric’s tastes.

“Ow!” He rubbed the back of his head, Winry firmly grabbed the collar of his overly saturated red shirt. 

“I am gone for two months and the first thing I see is you screaming at a child! You are twenty-three years old! Twenty-three! I swear if I was sent to babysit I would have gone back to Granny’s! At least Den has the decency to not scream at children! How the hell are you in the military when you can’t even talk to a kid!” She shook the man, despite their size difference he swung around like a loose branch in a windstorm.

“She star-” He began and shut down as quickly as her cold glare hit him harder than the wrench. 

“She is eleven Ed! Eleven! I can’t believe you! I can’t believe I am marrying such a juvenile blockhead!” She shouted at him. 

He huffed, anger overtaking him again. “Who are you calling childish? At least I’m not an antisocial gearhead who spends all their time oil-” 

“At least I’m not starting fights with children and procrastinating paperwork every day!” She huffed back. 

“I shouldn’t even be doing paperwork! I am a state alchemist! Besides, you like it when I call you, you hypocrite!” He barked back. 

She barked back. “It doesn’t matter if you like it! It's your job, and I don’t want you to lose your job because you miss me, you cheesy knucklehead!” She hit him on the chest, almost gently. 

“Well, that’s your fault for being so easy to miss.” He huffed, but Eve could sense the playfulness in his tone. It made them feel nauseous. 

“Shut up, idiot.” She huffed back, her hand around her chest and her face reddened. “You are half the problem to you big dolt…” She grumbled quietly, almost as if she didn’t want him to hear. 

He was quiet for a moment, before smiling a nice genuine smile that made Eve want to puke on sight. He wrapped Winry in a hug that she had no problem accepting. 

Her expression went serious, “But if I ever catch you screaming at a child again I will kill you.” She threatened. 

Elric straightened up, his eyes wide and voice shaky. “R-right.”

Meanwhile, Eve watched in a mix of pure confusion, disappointment, and raw disgust. Needless to say, married life looked far from appealing. 

After the brief yet disgusting display ended, Winry let go of Ed and turned to Eve. 

Eve, who quickly put on their sadness most nervous expression. They were a poor kid who had just been yelled at by a big mean adult after all. 

“Ed look at what you’ve done! You freaked her out!” Winry scolded once more, Ed just rubbed the back of his neck guilty. 

Winry approached them sweetly, they could get a better look at her now. She had a flat figure with a bit of an hourglass to it, unlike the queen of plastic tits, Winry’s was very subtle. From her face, she looked roughly early to mid-twenties and wore a pale blue bottom-up with dark pants cuffed at the bottom. Her hair was in a small braid, a fishtail, unlike Elric, at least they weren’t those creepy couples who matched all the time.

At least they couldn’t say Elric had no taste, but the blonde hair was only barely lighter than his. Her eyes kind of reminded Eve of Trisha’s soft yet annoying hawk eyes, so maybe incest was off the table, but mommy complex? Possibly?

She walked over to Eve, with a sweet smile. “I’m Winry, Winry Elric-Rockbell.” She got red saying it, her smile creaking up a bit more. “Sorry about that idiot.”

Eve kept their slightly nervous facade, rubbing their hand around their other arm. “Evelyn Theophrastus Van Hohenheim, but you can just call me Eve.” They looked down, then back up to face her with a sugar-sweet smile and their hand out. 

Winry took Eve’s hand and shook it pleasantly. “Nice to meet you, Eve!” 

“You as well, Miss Rockbell,” Eve replied respectfully, they could see the scorn in Ed’s eyes, and-smugness? What does he have to be smug about?

“That’s quite a different smile from before.” Winry commented. 

“Huh?” Eve questioned. Winry hadn’t let go of their hand. Were they smiling before? When she was walking up? No, Eve was better than that, they didn’t slip that easy-

“You just seemed really happy when I came in,” Winry said, there was a fire in her voice under her calm tone. It was like hell under the surface of a flowery field. 

“Y-yeah well-I heard you come in and Elric was being really mean-” Eve sputtered, shifting in real discomfort now. 

Winry lifted an eyebrow but made no further comment. It didn’t help Eve feel any more or less busted, but it wasn’t clear from her expression she was letting it pass or if she believed them. Even if she did, why would it matter to them? Winry would be the villain if she pulled what she did with Elric, and Eve knew that Winry lacked context to defend her point if called out. Eve could have been smiling because Elric backed up not because his torment was amusing—which it was—but that was his fault for being so easy to work up! 

Winry let go of Eve’s hand and turned back to Ed, Eve caught Elric snickering. They huffed, what was he so smug about now? Winry didn’t even yell at them! She couldn’t do shit to them! Eve should be the one snickering not his sensitive ass! 

Eve heard shuffling from upstairs. About time Selim and Trisha came down! How long does it take for them to get ready? Did Selim get stuck in his stupid uniform or something? Or maybe he was too busy debating which shirt made his blue look bluer? Must be hard with all two of his options. 

Eve began to place the hideously brown napkins over the bland white plates. At least the white went well with their pink dress. Pink, a color they dreaded, but its flowing comfortable fabric made the dress bearable. The dress was an old one of their mothers, that they hemmed shorter at their ankles, with the same black strap shoes. They weren’t going to have another first impression looking like a boy, that Trisha incident was embarrassing enough. From Winry’s reaction, the soft pink and flowery dress was enough to keep them from being scolded. 

Eve glanced to Selim who finally came down the stairs, in a blue military uniform with his dark brown hair pulled back revealing his forehead and shoving his scar in everyone's face. A dog after a trip to the groomers, more accurately a puppy, Eve rolled their eyes. The black shirt made the blue bluest, definitely worth the extra twenty minutes on that one.

Selim approached Winry with a smile, Trisha soon followed in her purple dress and apron. The same dress from this morning, Eve could feel her mother rolling in her grave. At least Eve was trying to make a proper impression. 

“You must be Winry Rockbell, I’m Major Selim Theosphrastus Bombastrus Van Hohenheim. Major Hohenheim for short. A pleasure to make your acquaintance!” Selim held out his hand, Winry took his hand, Selim surprised by her strong grip.

“A pleasure to meet you, Major!” She said with a smile. 

Selim’s smile widened, he quickly sharpened his expression to a more serious one. “Well, the pleasure is all mine Miss Rockbell, or rather Miss Elric.” 

Winry turned away briefly, doing her best to hide her smile. Eve wanted to vomit again.  
___________________________________________________

Selim did his best to hide the pride bubbling in his chest, he was a major now. Even introducing himself as one felt so surreal, right out of a dream. He was a major, he had to be professional! Even if he had only heard good things about Miss Rockbell— or Elric, whichever she preferred-he had to leave a lasting impression of maturity. He swept his uniform over, touching it left sparks of excitement along his fingers. No—this wasn’t the time for that! Childish excitement and honeymoon phases were unprofessional. 

He caught his sibling’s bitter expression, their pink dress, and hair in a small braid reminiscent of Edward’s own. It would almost be cute if not for the darkness radiating from them. 

He entered the kitchen, seeing Edward now chatting along with Trisha and Winry about their last meeting. His sibling wasted no time opening their mouth. 

“Nice hair.” Eve snarked, leaning back against the cabinets with their arms crossed. 

“Thank you, I was about to say the same.” He hummed, looking over the table. It had a pale brown, hand-sewn tablecloth that held a lovely rustic charm, with metal silverware haphazardly set on one side of the white plates. 

“Yeah, it's called using soap instead of cement, might want to try it sometime.” They grinned. It was clearly macassar oil, not that his sibling would know such a thing. They knew little to nothing of men's hair care procedures.

“Well, I’m sure Edward approves.” He tilted an eyebrow back at them, they scuffed. 

“Elric didn’t invent braiding du-jerk.” They growled, glancing at Winry before altering their sentence.

“I didn’t say he did.” He smirked back. 

Eve clenched their arms tighter, “The tables already done, so you don’t have to bother. Of course, you already knew that.”, they spit back. 

“I didn’t think you two needed any more help, I was quite tired after this afternoon, you know.” He replied, pushing open his chair from the table. The kitchen smelt heavenly, he could imagine the oven-roasted potatoes and ham. He had helped Trisha prepare all afternoon, cutting and peeling, while Eve sat hobbled in their room. 

“Oh, was the major tired after cutting a couple of tomatoes? How tragic! Those four plates must have been too much for you, there is no way you could handle it after so much back-breaking work!” They replied in a sarcastically dramatic tone, a devilish smirk on their face with their hand resting next to it. 

“As opposed to someone who spent all morning in their room? I’d like to think Trisha was thankful someone helped.” He stated sharply, his expression narrowing. 

Eve glared back, before swiftly deciding the conversation was over. They walked over to the three chatting, now wearing the same fake smile they had before. 

________________________________________________________________________

The dinner started, the Elrics setting dishes in the middle of the table. Roasted potatoes cut up into chips mixed with cheese, and ham cooked with vegetables and mixed greens. There were various gravies and sauces in small bowls, and salt and pepper exchanged among the table. Conversations stirred up after a few minutes of eating, starting with compliments on the food. 

Eve hadn’t said a word of compliment outside of agreeing with Winry on Trisha’s ham. Selim could tell they were still sour from the previous conversation. How childish, they set themselves up by calling him lazy in the first place. What did they think would happen? He would simply agree with them? He did good work while they were cooped up in bed! He took a bite of his potatoes, it was hard to stay bitter with food this good. Trisha was a family cook, and it was obvious. Every recipe was eyeballed and not one thing on the table was overdone. 

He turned himself back into the conversation between the Elrics. 

“... That’s different!” Winry insisted. 

“How is it any different? Transmutation doesn’t scrap details, any gearhead alchem-” Ed barked back. 

“First of all! Automail is unique! You can’t make an array that works for every customer! You would have to re-make the array every time to fit bo-” Winry continued. 

“Not if you had it account for height and mass.” Selim interrupted. 

The pair shot their attention to him, Ed smiling with an approving look, Winry much more annoyed. 

“It’s not just height and mass! It’s individual usage and wear, how it affects the port, the limb, the type of port. It's about people, not just science.” Winry insisted. 

“Coming from the person who ranted to me for an hour straight about how people don’t use enough copper in their alloys.” Ed huffed, and adjusted his glasses that had gone askew from the playfully heated conversation.

“I care about my customers! Copper is necessary for sturdiness in specific models, and not everyone needs it. It's not a one-person sci-” Winry replied. 

“Major Wilks used alchemy to create alloys just as strong as automail. I’m sure nothing was stopping him from crafting or mending automail with his alchemy alone.” Selim commented, a bit of hubris in his tone. 

“Major Comanche and Brigadier General Grand are gearheads, bet they could do it.” Ed chuckled. 

“If it's so easy then why haven't they?” Winry huffed. 

“Don’t know, maybe I’ll ask them. Give them a week, bet they could make automail better than half the greasy dorks in Rush.” Ed said with a smile, leaning back in his chair. 

“Those pricks aren’t going to do anything that benefits anything but their wallets,” Eve spoke up, Selim darting his eyes to glare at them sharply. He didn’t need them to be disrespectful, much less to another major and a guest. 

“Why doesn’t Fullmetal do it?” Eve continued, Selim slightly wishing they won’t. “He can already make iron, throw in a couple more metals and you got yourself an alloy. Unless they call you Fullmetal for nothing.” Eve teased.

Winry smiled with a finger to her lip. She mused about the idea for a bit. “You know, that’s not a bad idea. Don’t you think, Major Elric, Major Hohenheim?” 

Elric shifted back in his seat, Trisha giggled lightly. Ed caught Selim’s gaze, Selim humming a bit. 

As much as he liked Elric, he could only stand back up. This wasn’t exactly his fight to win, “I’m afraid I won’t be much good, electromagnetic waves are my specialty.” 

“So you are backing out?” Winry accused, “What happened to proving how inferior mechanics were?” 

“Backing out is a strong statement, more so I know my skills. I can vouch for my fellow alchemists, but I am bound to my field. You won’t ask an ear surgeon to mend your leg pain, that doesn’t devalue one's skills.” Selim replied, Winry merely quirked up an eyebrow skeptically. 

“I guess that leaves you, Ed.” She hummed, Ed remained unmoved, his mind lost in thought.

He mentally shook himself of the fog of his mind and straightened up, leaning forward with bravo. “Yeah, I could do it. A month, easy. I’m not a gear hugging weirdo, so it might take a little bit longer to get familiar.” He stretched, his voice far too casual.

Winry chuckled. “Willing to put your money where your mouth is, Major?” She teased. 

“See me in a month, I’ll be running my own little shop out of Central.” He smiled, something felt off in his smile, but Selim ignored it. It was likely just arrogance. Selim liked Elric, but he seemed to specialize in two things, metal alchemy, and digging his own grave. 

“I’ll be looking forward to it.” Winry hummed, her sharp look of determination in her eyes only matched by Elric’s bravo. 

“You know Eve studies alkahestry, it's quite fascinating,” Trisha commented, softly breaking the competitive silence between the newly-weds. 

“Alkahestry? That’s the alchemy from Xing, right?” Winry asked, clearly taking Trisha’s cue. 

“It’s not alchemy, it's a whole different system,” Eve said, now a bit of pride in their voice. “It uses energy that flows and pulses from the earth, alchemy is energy from the tectonic plates. Elric couldn’t get it, but it’s pretty genius in its simplicity.” 

Ed rolled his eyes. “It’s not in my field, it's mostly medical-based after all.” He defended, of course, he would use Selim’s reasoning. 

“They are quite skilled when they aren’t filling the walls with holes.” Selim began, with slight irritation. His mind drifting back to their room at home, and the wall with more holes than a linked fence. “Of course, alkahestry is more simple in its process, which is likely why it is so much more accessible. Alkahestry is the main medical source in Xing, unlike alchemy’s use in Amestrian society. Eve is a caring person, it's no wonder they leaned toward it.”

Eve sharpened their gaze at Selim, before calming. He was surprised he didn’t need to calm them, they had always been defensive about alkahestry. He never understood why, unless it was a case of their ego? Yet Eve was sensitive, immature often, but egotistical? It was the opposite. Maybe they were realizing the truth in his words, the thought brought him some peace. His sibling was growing up after all, in their own little ways. 

Winry was taking in his words, or maybe coming up with her own? She had to have a lot of questions, alkahestry was virtually unheard of Ametris. He mused in his thoughts of which ones he could answer, Eve would have to take most. Yes, he had read father’s journals but mostly the ones of alchemy, the ones of alkahestry weren’t fresh in his mind. Even if they were, he never bothered to put them into practice like his sibling. He hadn’t found it necessar-

Winry whispered something in Trisha’s ear before the older woman smiled sweetly. “I’ve actually been wondering that myself, but you would have to ask them personally.” 

“Ask us what? Nothing about alkahestry is personal, most of our knowledge is from our father’s journals after all.” Selim hummed back, but Winry shifted a bit awkwardly.

“That wasn’t what I was wondering.” She said her finger to her lip briefly. She glanced around, like whatever she was asking she needed to format carefully. “Whenever you talk about Eve, you call her ‘they’, not one of you has called Eve ‘her’ since the dinner started.” 

Eve froze, and he felt the room get tense. It seemed only those two had noticed, the other three at dinner seemed to carry distance curiosity. 

Eve tightened a sharp glare to Selim as if it was his fault. How was it his fault? His sibling liked to be referred to that way? Did the sudden attention bother them? Winry was simply curious. 

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to make it weird, I just-” Winry shrunk down. “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have asked-” 

“No.” Eve piped up. “It's fine. It’s whatever,” Eve shifted their gaze, their arms crossed. “I’m a girl, just so you know. Selim just does that because he’s a weirdo, guess Trisha picked up on it because Major weirdo was doing it. Didn’t feel like correcting them.” 

Eve was lying and he knew it, but he couldn’t help them from trying to save face. Mother always had them safe face for their little incidents and being ‘caught’, but life was different now. Trisha, Edward, even Winry, they were good people. The closest thing to a family the siblings had. The thought hurt in his chest, but it was the truth. His father was an incredible man, but he was a traveler, a man of mystery. He was never around for Eve to remember. Mother… Mother still lingered in their souls, in Trisha’s acts of kindness, in Solaris’s knowledge and play of a crowd...But she was nothing more than waste in the ground, and a burden of a life Selim himself couldn’t except was truly gone. 

“Eve, you can trust us,” Selim said though he knew there was sorrow in his voice. 

Eve looked down at their plate. “Trust you with what? I gave you the truth-” 

“Selim it’s fine if she doesn’t have too.” Winry insisted he could see the guilt in her eyes, the way the mood shifted darkness around them. Winry didn’t deserve it, none of this was her fault. 

“They. Even if they don’t trust you to tell you the truth I am their sibling. I don’t know why they are like this or why they aren’t comfortable admitting it, but I would never do something to make them uncomfortable. I’m not forcing them, they have been like this through childhood-” Selim said, with stern focus. Even if Eve did do to save face, there was no face left to save. It wasn’t worth his sibling’s unhappiness, Winry would understand. ”It makes them happy, I see no other reason than that.” 

Eve turned away, tightening their arms trying to disappear. 

Winry looked at them, eyes still full of guilt. Edward put his arm around her shoulder, meeting her eyes with confusion and his guilt. Trisha rose from the table, walking toward Eve. They shifted away from her. 

A few moments of silence passed before Eve spoke again. Their voice was weak, ashamed. “Murder makes a lot of people happy, doesn’t make it okay.” 

Selim sighed, it sounded just like something mother would say. Something mother likely did say, along with other things he wasn’t around to hear. “No one is going to die because of your comfort Eve.” 

“So what? That means we can spit in the face of the person who already did?” Their volume grew but their eyes kept their blankness.

Selim got up, he walked opposite to Trisha. Whatever display Eve was making was not continuing here, Winry had done nothing wrong to deserve it. He met Eve at their chair, his voice stern and eyes cold. “Eve, come with me upstairs.” 

Eve’s eyes widened before they huffed sharply. Their body relaxing slightly and posture loosening. “Why? So you can scold me?” 

“No, I want to talk.” He said curtly.

“Oh yeah, you look like you want to talk-” Eve huffed, rubbing their eyes in annoyance. 

“Eve.” He repeated, his sibling rolled in their seat. 

“Yeah, yeah.” Eve pulled themselves up, standing up with a sharp grin. “Lead the way.” 

Selim went upstairs, his sibling following close behind. Eve waved goodbye to the group and Selim did his best to rein in his temper with his sibling’s fit.

Once upstairs, they settled in his guest room on the bed. 

Eve did their best to keep their false swagger, sitting forward on the bed avoiding their siblings eye contact. 

Selim thought of his words carefully, he wasn’t in the best state of mind. His sibling was sensitive, he had to be an older sibling. To be an older sibling would only make them more upset, or make them find a way to cause a bigger stir than they did. Eve wasn’t thinking of Winry or the other Elrics. Selim sighed loudly, before softening his cold eyes. 

“I’m not expecting you to act like everything is fine.” He stated, his sibling chuckled. 

“Yeah, that’s your job.” They replied instantly, he dismissed it.

“Mother is gone, whatever expectations or mistakes she made are of the past.” He said. It wasn’t like he wanted it this way. Eve knew of their mothers' mistakes, even in death it followed the siblings like a thick fog. A fog he knew only he could see, that would only drown his dear sibling. His fists gripped the once flattened blanket tightly. “It’s not fine, whatever happens now will be different. All I am asking of you is to tr-” 

“Try and get over it l-” Eve began. 

“Eve.” Selim snapped, his sibling’s eyes widened and then turned aside from him. He hated to see them so uncomfortable by him, but he had no choice. This was how it was, they never listened, they never respected him. 

“I’m not asking you to get over anything, I’m asking you to try. We can’t pretend mother is still here, she is gone. We can’t hold ourselves to rules set by the dead, no matter how important.” He looked up to the speckled ceiling, a part of him wanting to say more. He wasn’t sure he could, no it was better that way. All he could see was the bills that scattered Solaris’s table and hear the landlord screaming at him through the phone. “The dead still make mistakes, and mistakes don’t pass on, they carry forever-” 

“Mother didn’t make mistakes,” Eve muttered, clearly not convinced themselves. 

“Major Wilks was a mistake. He screamed in our faces, and Mother let it happen.” Selim replied. It seemed like it was only yesterday he saw Eve in tears in the shed. The day Wilks threw a book in Selim’s direction in the middle of Wilk’s tutoring sessions, shouting at him and his family. The distant screams between his mother and the major that carried until the sunrise. A week later he went alone to Wilks's family home and did his tutoring. There was never a question about it. The thought still shook him to his core. 

Eve was silent, stewing in their thoughts. Their knee now up on the bed, now holding it close to them. 

“She was just worried about you, just as she was then. She was worried people would hurt you,-” He began, Eve chuckled somberly. 

“No, she was worried I would embarrass her. ‘What kind of child doesn’t even know basic grammar? Do you like looking like a fool?’” Eve mocked. “Look, I get you’re trying to help and all. Pull the ‘big brother gives a shit now’ crap, but let's be real here. You didn’t care then, you went to Wilks house after he hit her in the face. You let him go to her funeral, you gave him a speech. If you really gave two shits, you -you should have told him to fuck right off. Or was it not worth the trouble? I mean he only abused our mom? What, do you want brownie points because you played a good guy at the funeral you invited him too?”

“It was what Mother would have wanted,” Selim muttered it was true. He only did things as Mother wanted them. She would never have him burn a bridge like that, she didn’t. He and Wilks were still close, even with the man's foul temper. “I had no desire to patch things up with that man, it was for Mother. She-..” He sighed. “I suppose that makes me a hypocrite doesn’t it?”

“Maybe, I was going to say asshole. But a hypocritical asshole sounds better, adds flavor.” They snided, waving their free hand loosely in the air. 

Selim glared at them, well at least they were feeling better. “Don’t push it.” 

“Sorry, am I upsetting the puppy?” Eve mocked, a finger to their lip, their knee went lax. 

“Rich talk for a glorified nurse.” He snarked back. 

Eve smiled and fell back on the bed with a bounce. “Tell you what, you call Wilks a bitch to his face, and I’ll accept the whole ‘they’ crap.” 

Yeah, sure, pretend they hate it now. The minute it's called out, Selim rolled his eyes.”Or I could never call my fellow soldier something that degrading and I start referring to you as she. If that’s truly what you desire.”

Eve flinched, “Sure, saves me the trouble.” They lied, their grin shaky. 

Selim pushed himself up from the bed, with a playful smile. “Funny you didn’t bring it up before, really would have saved me the trouble, sister.” He was slow on the last word, catching his sibling’s eyes drift away and forward, the flinch in their skin. The word was as alien to his lips as it was to their ears, Selim could see the discomfort in their eyes. “Unless…” 

“Unless what?” They curled their eyebrow up, weirdly focused on his words. 

“Unless...I don’t want to do that. You don’t make a very good girl, after all, swearing is unwomanly.” He smiled. 

“Unwomanly? What, you get that from Wilks too?” Eve teased, getting up to straighten their dress. 

“Please, if it was Wilks it would be far more vulgar,” Selim replied. Eve seemed rather overdressed for a casual party come to think of it? Not that either of them owned anything close to casual. He should probably mend that if he can make the time. 

“Pfft… Yeah, probably something along the line of ‘whores’ or ‘bitches’.” They joked back, still a bit tense but far calmer. It was nice to see them calmer, their own version of it. 

“Yes, as opposed to you. Who is far more dignified.” He hummed in response. 

Eve stepped toward the door, pushing the stray hairs from their face. “Wilks is a whiny bitch, I just call it as I see it. Not my fault half the women in the military are glorified arm candy.”

It wasn’t worth calling out the hypocrisy, not with his relationship with Wilks. Eve didn’t know anyone from the military, they had no intention too. They didn’t understand or have a reason to want to understand. So he left it be. 

Eve opened the door. “You coming or you just gonna be a lazy bitch up here?” 

“Give me a moment, I’ll be right down,” Selim said he wanted to sit with his thoughts for a little longer. Their conversation on Wilks wasn’t one he desired to have, but now it's happened. That’s enough to mull over in itself, and it wouldn’t hurt to make it obvious he wasn’t forcing his sibling to apologize. He didn’t exactly give them the best impression when he had to bring them upstairs after all.

They rolled their eyes dramatically. “Whatever.” 

When he came back down all the plates were being removed from the table, he could tell from Winry’s somber expression and Trisha’s kind look they had had their own conversation. He smiled softly back at them, making his way into the kitchen to grab the remaining utensils from the table.

“Eve should be just fine, they are cleaning themselves up,” Selim answered the question lingering in the air. 

Winry grabbed a plate for the small pile of dirty ones, turning on the sink with her other hand. “I’m sorry I brought it up, I didn’t mean to make her-th-Eve uncomfortable.”

Trisha set a hand to Winry’s shoulder kindly, and the younger woman smiled weakly back to her.

“Don’t be, none of it was your fault. Eve has their own things they’ve been going through, we both do really. I didn’t mean for them to take it out on you like that, I’m sure they are sorry too- even if they don’t say it.” He said, setting the dirty knives and forks into the sinks steaming water. 

Winry was quiet for a moment, picking her words again. “It must have been hard for you two.” She said sympathetically. 

“It was hard for many people, you lost both your parent two didn’t you miss Elric?” Selim replied it was strangely hypocritical for her to assume only him and Eve had it hard. Their problems were simply more recent, plenty have had it far worse. 

Winry looked away briefly, before focusing back on placing dishes in the filling sink. “Yes, but that was years ago, and I wasn’t- I just can’t imagine it’s the same. I wasn’t there, not like you two were.” 

There, of course. Eve had seen their mother’s corpse, Winry hadn’t even been close. To Winry, it was all words written on a page, not the smell that haunted Selim’s nostrils, or the startling clear image of a white woman with eyes sunken into total darkness. Selim shook the thought from his head, it was the past. 

“Pain is relative,” Trisha said, now grabbing the table cloth for washing. “It’s only been a few months, barely so. Mourning is a long process with many steps, there is no guilt in needing time.”

Selim couldn’t help but feel the irrelevance or randomness of the statement, Eve was mourning with their own time. Winry would know of mourning as well, but Selim had never asked her. He thought it was unbefitting to dig so personal. 

“Eve is just taking things as stubborn as always, I’m sure they will find their peace. For now, try not to take anything personally, I assure you it isn’t.” Selim said, he heard Trisha step away toward the laundry room. 

“I take it, it's genetic.” Winry hummed back. 

Selim chuckled a bit. “I suppose so, our mother was quite a stubborn woman herself, and father- well I can’t speak on that, but it certainly won’t surprise me.” His father had to be a bit stubborn to achieve all he did, but he was a man of mystery. A wonderful man, but Selim’s vague memories made only a weak image of him. 

Winry laughed softly at that, “Yes, your mother was the stubborn one.” 

“Well, it’s not like you know my father more than I do. I would be well aware of if he was!” He had read all of his father's journals after all! Who better to know of his father! 

Winry rolled her eyes, then grabbed a wire scrubber for the dishes. 

Selim tilted up an eyebrow. “It’s true, I know my father better than most! I’ve read every single one of his journals and it's fascinating. He had to be stubborn to some extent to get anywhere close to his achievements.” He set a hand to his chest proudly. 

Winry chuckled and began to scrub the plates. “Well then, proud son of Hohenheim, mind helping me with these dishes?” 

He straightened up, his face going flush. “Right, of course.” He cleared his throat. “My apologies, I get carried away sometimes. I just look up to him fondly, as most do.” Selim shifted his gaze quickly. He walked over to grab a dishrag for drying. 

Winry smiled at him, a nice and warm smile. “I can tell.” She handed him a plate.

“I have a good reason, I wouldn't be who I was today if it weren’t for his achievements.” Selim smiled, drying the plate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still getting my motivation back, and deciding on shorter more frequent chapters. Life has just been too busy to pull out my normal length, will be updating every couple of weeks. The lengths will vary, but hopefully, this is as short as the chapters get!
> 
> Also a surprise, this chapter is all fluff, at least I think. (I have no idea what fluff or any of that stuff means, I just like angst)


End file.
